- Username
- TapDrumRoll
- Date posted
- 1y ago
I’m a complex case. Maybe someone can relate.
I don’t have body odor (genitalia), but I had an incident when I was 19 and was on my period. I waited too long to change my napkin and I got a whiff of my scent. It gave me the OCD I have today. I’m 54 and 10yrs over with periods, and just goes to show how the brain can be your worst enemy. You see, I know I don’t smell, and I don’t spend much time showering or laundering, but when I’m public, I think people think, that I think that I can smell myself. Pretty much am fearful that I give off the vibe that I smell. It is Sooooo twisted. I bet most people can’t even understand this. I think “they” are looking at me and judging me and can tell that I am not comfortable with my nether regions. It’s crazy even typing this out. I don’t like crouching, sitting cross legged and other various positions that send me into BIG Time ANXIETY. I can’t think, I sweat, my heart races, I feel like the world is saying “You are so weird. What’s wrong with you. Ewwww!” I did some ERP for a few months, but then I’m fine for a while and then BOOM it comes back. I’m uncomfortable with my body I suppose. And my brain keeps looping on that day when I was 19. Just had to tell my embarrassing story in case someone else feels embarrassed as well. I’m trying to sit with it, haha, sit with it really. But if anyone has something similar to my type of OCD, I’d appreciate your opinions or experience or just acknowledgement. No need for detail if you don’t want to share. Thanks everyone. ❤️