Username: Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Someone who needs help

There is someone who frequently posts on this app about the same topics and also send me texts about the same things as well. I’ve tried to help in the best way I can, like explain how compulsions work yet they continue to seek reassurance about the same things through me as well as the app, which we all know, makes matters worse when it comes to OCD. They are aware of this, yet they continue to seek reassurance constantly. I repeat myself a lot and encourage them to try ERP but I don’t know what else to do or how to help this person anymore at this point.

Username: 6827368273

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Maybe just tell them that you are sorry but cannot answer the same questions. I did the same thing with my therapist and she literally blocked me from emailing her between sessions

Username: Erin PErin P

Date posted: 1y ago

I agree - let them know the best way you can help them is to not reassure them.

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Erin P I’ve never put it in a simple way like that. I guess if they text me again I’ll just say “I’m sorry but the best way I can help you is to jot reassure you.” But, I’ve noticed something else with this person.. when people tell them things they’ve already heard they’re always like, “oh really???” Or ask for explanations… it’s like.. you already knew this… do you not believe anything you’re being told? Why act surprised?

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

It’s starting to affect me, honestly. I feel a little guilty saying that. Because I don’t want to make them feel like they don’t have support. But I have my own struggles that I’m trying to tackle right now and I can’t really take on someone else’s problems, especially when anything I say doesn’t seem to help them anyway. I know that sounds so horrible but I feel I’ve tried to set boundaries but it’s not resonating with them.

Username: erika.alexxerika.alexx

Date posted: 1y ago

@Tee10 you HAVE to take care of yourself first, end of story

Username: Erin PErin P

Date posted: 1y ago

@Tee10 You are giving them the gift of the tough love they need and taking care of yourself. Both are absolutely the right things to do.

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Erika-Alexx Thank you 💗

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Erin P Thanks so much!!!

Username: Erin PErin P

Date posted: 1y ago

@Tee10 ❤️

Username: 123g123g

Date posted: 1y ago

I have a friend who suffers from OCD as well and she would do the same thing and constantly ask me for reassurance about the same thing and I knew I wasn’t helping her by reassuring her. I tried explaining to her why I think we should both try not to reassure each other all the time and although she didn’t take it the best at first, after some time, she realized it was for the best. Just be honest and say that you are there for them, but reassurance makes it worse. It doesn’t necessarily mean you can never reassure them; just not all the time. Hope this helps. :)

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@laughlin.123 Thanks!!

Username: erika.alexxerika.alexx

Date posted: 1y ago

I feel like I'm not entirely sure what it means to ask/receive reassurance and I think that I ask for and give others reassurance without realizing it. maybe they are also a little fuzzy on what that means. Maybe tell them to talk to their therapist about what it means to not seek reassurance or if you know of an article that explains it, it could help them.

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Erika-Alexx I’ve tried to explain this to them. But maybe I can find another way to say it. Thanks for the suggestion.

Username: Erin PErin P

Date posted: 1y ago

@Tee10 You can simply say - I’ve answered you once and if you didn’t have OCD that would be enough. OCD wants you to keep asking and get deeper into the details. I care enough about you to not answer any more questions in this. Only an ERP therapist (workbook/book if they don’t have insurance) can help you further. My husband used the “ask me once rule” and then moved to not answering anything related to OCD - it helped me identify when I was seeking reassurance and to stop doing so.

Username: Tee10Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Erin P Great point, thank you 😊

Username: Tqh

Date posted: 5y ago

The amount of posts seeking for reassurance is ridiculous, people, if you see posts like that, please please don’t answer their questions, I know that you’re just trying to help, but you’re doing more harm than good by feeding the ocd monster. Notice how people wanting to be reassured are always coming back with the same question a few hours, or days later, so it doesn’t work and it won’t help you get better!

Username: MJocd

Date posted: 5y ago

I feel SO GUILTY for this, but I suffer from OCD myself and I always feel morally obligated to help other OCD sufferers as much as I can so they dont feel alone or isolated but today somebody from a fb support group I am in contacted me with their POCD thoughts and kept asking me for reassurance, I told them it was OCD and nothing else. I told them not to engage in reassurance seeking behaviours etc. But my OCD thoughts became directed at the OCD sufferer and now I cant stop ruminating "what if that person is a bad person, how could I know?" "What if every ocd sufferer you've spoken too could potentially be a bad person?", I know the person contacting me is in therapy for their OCD and clearly struggling with a mental illness. I feel so guilty for having those thoughts, I felt anxious when she described her thoughts to me and I feel bad for having my intrusive thoughts that are directed towards her. Maybe I shouldn't help anyone since I am suffering from OCD myself. :(

Username: Jay Bird

Date posted: 2y ago

This app has become overwhelming

There are so many posts on here now that it’s become quite overwhelming. Some days I can use the app appropriately and get actually helpful information out of it or attempt to offer insight to people struggling. However, lately I’ve found I’ve been using it as a bit of a compulsion to see other people struggling like me to “reassure” myself it’s OCD. But I’ve also been triggered by a lot of people offering others really bad advice that isn’t good for OCD. There are way too many reassurance seeking posts (I know it’s hard, I’ve been guilty of it too). I think I’m going to take a break from the app. My advice to you, stop seeking constant reassurance. Stop obsessively reading stuff related to your intrusive thoughts/worries.

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