you.are.enough

Date posted: 2y

Just Wondering

What is it like to not have OCD or an anxious mind that is frequently ruminating? What do people like this think about? When they go run errands or are driving, what is on their minds? I've realized how I'm usually worrying about something--to the point that it makes me wonder what my life would be like if I didn't. What would I notice? What would I think about? How would I feel? I'm tired of worrying. I'm tired of listening to that mean voice that says I'm not good enough & that there's something wrong with me. I'm tired of feeling down, sad, & anxious. I want to be without all this mental noise, without this feeling that I have to be worried about something or fixing something about myself. How would I behave if I didn't have OCD or an anxious, worrying mind? I think we can all benefit from asking ourselves this question and focusing our energy on making it happen.

Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

I remember the old me and I thought about the things I wanted to do, the task at hand, the conversations I had earlier, the tv show I was watching, the song I was listening to, whatever it was I was doing etc. There was no over analyzing it, no need to put a meaning to it.. I miss it so so much. I miss being excited about things and having that sense of wonder.

A. V.

Date posted: 2y

@Tee10 this hit hard... i also remember those times and they just feel so far away...

Tee10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@A. V. Mine do too. Now if I have moments of “normal” I just feel uncomfortable. I feel stuck.

NotSoNewb82

Date posted: 2y

@Tee10 I agree with you. I used to think about normal things too.

you.are.enough

Date posted: 2y

That part that you said about no need to overanalyzing or put a meaning to whatever you're thinking, doing, or noticing totally captures OCD & the anxious mind. I'm sorry that you feel so distant from that part of yourself who felt free to be in the present moment. I really have to believe that we can still cultivate a life that feels exciting & where our analytical, worrying minds don't run the show.

Jwals

Date posted: 2y

I think about this too a lot. How would it be to live outside my head and in the moment vs constantly in my head

you.are.enough

Date posted: 2y

Yes. I just want to be in the moment. It's so hard not to get carried away from the present by my thoughts. I think it would initially feel very anxiety-inducing to not tend to the thoughts. Maybe we just have to be willing to be with that anxiety.

AnnaCate

Date posted: 2y

Ugh I feel this so much!! You’re not alone

you.are.enough

Date posted: 2y

Sorry you're struggling with this too but it's comforting to know I'm not alone in feeling this way.

Napalala

Date posted: 2y

Tbh idk how I would feel. I’ve always had ocd and it never truly went away. But just thinking how it would feel to suddenly not have ocd, I’d imagine it would feel pretty alien, and I would be confused at first, but I would also know my mind would be like a peaceful still ocean, no massive waves coming to party crash my mood. I’d imagine my mind would also be very organized and steady about what it thinks about. No surprise entry’s here. Ya know?

you.are.enough

Date posted: 2y

I like that imagery of a peaceful still ocean. Life might bring waves but if we could still have a default sense of stillness in our minds, wouldn't that be awesome?

Joss4prez

Date posted: 2y

I experience the same things! I didn’t know it was OCD until recently which was honestly a relief to know what’s going on. I genuinely didn’t know other people didn’t have thoughts constantly running through their minds. It’s like the concept of a truly clear mind is new to me.

Dutchgirl

Date posted: 2y

I wonder what I would think about if ocd thoughts didn’t hijack my brain?

bokang

Date posted: 21w

I miss my weekends...

I'm wondering if this is a common OCD experience: does anyone else find that when you have idle time, your mind just spirals into endless rumination on negative "what ifs" & intrusive thoughts? It's been happening to me for the past three years, which coincides with starting a really high-stress job. Weekends used to be my time to relax, but now I dread weekends...I only feel relief when I'm sleeping because it's the only time my mind seems to quiet down. It's honestly so depressing to lose that enjoyment. Does anyone else relate to this, and if so, what helps you cope?

ocdonedidily1

Date posted: 20w

Perfectionism OCD and rumination

There’s this one situation that I haven’t stopped thinking about from last night . So basically, I was reading 'The power of Now' which is a book that I love so much and really got me into spirituality. It’s been so helpful for my OCD and rumination but it’s also been pretty triggering for it as of late, so I’ve taken a long break from consistently reading it. The excerpt I read was about abundance and how its not about being bountiful, necessarily in material things but realizing and being grateful for the things that exist in your life now and in doing so, you will open yourself up to more good things. I understood it but I re-read it a lot because I didn't feel confident enough to explain it to someone else. but otherwise I LOVED IT. It made me feel so at peace, I agreed with it, and it gave me hope to start focusing on the good things in my life rather than the bad. So when I went to bed I rehearsed myself explaining it to someone on a podcast and then all these questions started flooding in like “why should I only focus on the good and aren't we supposed to accept the good and bad? Aren’t those the values of Buddha and spirituality” “Ya, we're supposed to accept the good and the bad but why?- so we can feel more good??? And isn't the point of OCD to not label things as good and bad? and why should I focus on the good- so I can feel good? why should I feel good? because I'm worthy of it? why am I worthy of it? because I'm a good person and do good things? well I’ve also done bad things so why shouldn't I consider that. I just don’t understand why I should feel good without it being selfish. And then this went on for like 2 or 3 hours. Like holy shit. I over explain these ideas and concepts that I resonate with to the point where they don't even make sense to me anymore. It becomes very existensial very quick. And I’m not suicidal but these questions make me feel hopeless in society for some reason?? And myself. Like if everything contradicts everything then what’s the point to life? If nothing can be understood or explained in a senseful way, then how do people move forward and make decisions, like AT ALL? There’s never a right or perfect answer and I feel like with any decision I make in regards, I’m doing a compulsion either way. If I don’t answer them, then I’m avoiding it and if I do then I’m checking and seeking reassurance. I’m sorry if this was way too long and over-explained I just need some advice or to know if anyone can relate in any way. Also, I’m sorry if some of those back-to-back questions were triggering.

nae nae

Date posted: 19w

Existing without anxiety?

Is this even a possibility? I'm not even sure if it's an OCD issue, GAD, or maybe a lack of something else, but I'm just constantly feeling off. Even if I'm not getting constant intrusive thoughts, I just feel on edge all the time? Is there anyone who's been able to overcome this? It bothers me so much 😭

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