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Remember that ocd tricks you brain and attacks the things you love the very most. You must love your niece so much ❤️

You literally explained what I’m going through. You’re not alone. I know it can get hard to the point we think not living can solve our problems. Just know your ocd plays tricks on you. You’re not your ocd. 🫶 Please stay.

That is so, so, so horrible that you had to live around a predator growing up and having to live with those memories. That sounds like an extremely heavy burden. I seriously cannot even imagine how much mental and emotional anguish you must suffer every day. Especially seeing something so wonderful like your niece showing her love for you and then have your mind override potential happiness and security from that. That does sound exhausting. Thank you for sharing what you're feeling even though you don't feel like life is worth it. You absolutely ARE worth it, but I know that with OCD, reassurance and affirmations can just make things worse and not really help at all. I hope you can get the help you need. Please keep sharing everything you're feeling even if it's just darkness. Keep getting help and sharing and talking. You are really awesome to open up about how your mind is working right now.

I'm so sorry I understand my life was slightly different I was married to a predator he's in prison for the rest of his life because of this I carry a lot of bad feelings I was abused both and my kids I always feel I should have done more they weren't hurt physically but mentally and well its long story but I understand and I'm so sorry you went through it and still feel it in your life I feel it too even when I'm not thinking about it I never saw it coming and then it slapped me in the face we ALL have a story to tell I truly believe no one leaves earth without some pain your not alone I know we feel alone but I'm glad I can tell you your not and others can as well its a small world and we're ALL connected hold on and b just breathe you can and you will be alright... 🌈

Sorry you were victimized. Talk therapy can help with this -it helped me for the minor molestations I went through. ERP therapy can help you with the fear of harm thoughts.

Also, if you are feeling suicidal, please call a suicide hotline for help. YOU ARE ALWAYS WORTH IT. YOUR BRAIN IS A MIRACULOUS THING and even though it brings so much sadness, it's capable of so many wonderful things too. I'm so sorry again that you are battling these feelings. I don't know if my words will help at all, but still, NEVER GIVE UP!! NO MATTER WHAT!