Relationship

It feels as if I don’t wanna be around my boyfriend anymore :( I don’t wanna feel that. I know tomorrow he wanted me to go to school with him but I don’t wanna go and it made me feel as in why? And I kept thinking does it mean I don’t wanna be with him? Or do I just not feel like going to school? I don’t wanna go to school that’s for sure I have no reason to other than be with him but I just don’t wanna be in school because I don’t need to be there. I just can’t stop and feel as if the reason I don’t wanna go is because I don’t wanna be with him :/ and that sucks I don’t wanna feel that way. I sometimes don’t feel like being around him but I don’t know why i don’t know if that’s bad it feels bad. We’ve been together for more than a year this semester we have over 4 classes together so I would say for like 4 hours and that’s all but sometimes after a while I wanna be alone or don’t wanna be with him but then I think I don’t wanna feel that way cause it’s just 4 hours and if I wanna be with him in the future I need to get used to being more with him. I know he says that when him and I are together for a long while he doesn’t wanna be with me anymore he wants to go with his friends.I love him to death I wouldn’t leave him it just feels terrible feeling this way and plus I’ve never had this feeling I only felt that way about being together to much because we once broke up and it was cause sometimes he just wanted to go with his friends and I wouldn’t really let him and he said we don’t always need to be together.

Keepin' On

Date posted: 2y

I think it means that you are normal and having thoughts that all people in couples feel. I've been married almost 18 years and sometimes I don't want to be around my husband and it's okay to want to be alone too or to want to spend time with friends. I think the part where you say "it feels terrible feeling this way" or where you are doubting if this normal feeling is bad is your ocd trying to mess with you. You aren't bad and the feeling isn't bad. I know that can't make the feeling go away necessarily, but I hope that helps some. Those doubts that we have that try and accuse us and poke us and whisper that something is so wrong with us... that isn't the truth.

whitneyx

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Hey there, I went through my doubts of if I really loved my partner before too! I totally know the anxious gut feeling you get and wishing you could just “think it through”. Unfortunately, OCD doesn’t let us do that sometimes. I practiced exposing myself to these thoughts (writing down reasons why i’m in the wrong relationship and sitting with the anxiety). I did this a couple of times along with sending messages of commitment and love even if my ocd brain was thinking “what if you don’t mean it”. These doubts suck and make you feel terrible. I still get the thoughts too just not as often nor as intense. On the other hand, you also need to build that trust with yourself and your partner that they will always be there no matter where you are or who you are with (easier said than done sometimes). My bf is going on a trip this weekend to visit some friends out of state. Soon we will be doing long distance after high school. It’s no walk in the park, but im never going to know what will happen. I’m only giving advice from what you wrote and I don’t know the details of your relationship, but you can manage! Prioritize your fears first and then learn your way around your relationship. If you ever need more advice just lmk. you got this!

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 25w

I feel like I don’t love him sometimes 💔

I realized I’ve depended a lot on my boyfriend for comfort through my ocd, and I’m starting to feel like even before my ocd I was paying more attention to the relationship itself more than him, or the attachment: even though I remember distinct feelings of me wanting to be with him forever, and feeling so happy and complete with him, time didn’t exist, I felt like my most authentic self. So now I’m trying to create a healthy attachment and see him as his own person, which was helping at first, but now it feels as if I’m seeing that I don’t actually love him for him, the thought of moving forward in life without him breaks my heart and I don’t want to but my mind keeps telling me that I want it because of the attachment. He’s the exact type of person and partner I would want but it feels like whatever I feel is not enough.. But I DO experience moments of affection and care and admiration for him but they don’t last long..before I started making this shift in perspective even with the ocd I was still so sure and confident in moving forward with him, I felt so much like I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. But now that I’ve made this shift it feels like I’m seeing him from a whole different place. Like all those good and happy feelings I had for him are gone now and I don’t have any confidence in what I want anymore. Before I did feel confident that I wanted to be with him but now it feels like there’s this wall between him and me :( I want to be with him I know I do, because even now I still feel the desire to keep going, but I can’t see the future anymore or the confidence to keep going. I was never much of a future thinker, even in my personal life but this feels like added proof I feel like I’m alone in this like no one else has this situation and the chances for me to realize after I recover that I don’t actually love him are so much higher 💔

MidoriCora124

Date posted: 22w

My relationship - potential tw???

So I’ve been with my boyfriend for about a month and 27 days and I love him but sometimes I just get the ick when I shouldn’t. I feel that he’s showing me too much affection and repeating things and I don’t wanna be rude and say I’m getting bored. Nor do I want to break up with him. He drove 7 hours just to see me and spent money on me the whole time we were hanging out. And it was fun. The last relationship he ever had was when he was in kindergarten.. so I’m assuming it’s just a new to relationships kind of thing so he accidentally love bombs me but he doesn’t make me feel bad. He’s just so annoying sometimes and I was wondering what I should do. I was considering just being blunt with him whenever I got the ick again. I just feel really bad and like I’m the problem. Thoughts?

Mariabae

Date posted: 20w

im horible

everytime i go out with my bf, he annoys me so much, but i get easily annoyed, he is just being himself and im so so si irritated by him, and i act out and i am rude to him, today i have upset him and he stopped talking to me. i font know what is wrong with me, i dont lnow if i like him, if i still have feelings, if i only want the ideea of the relationship, what if im only attached to him. i dont know anything, i have so many doubts. im so drained, i diny even know if i care that i upset him. i dont know. what if i dont care???

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