I'm posting a lot today but I need to get some thoughts out. I'm scared of life. The fact that we meet people who come in and out of our lives like it's a game. The fact that we can get ill at any given moment, or die under any circumstance at any given moment. We all try and be loved but the people we're trying to get to love us, are too busy trying to love themselves. Sight, sound, smell, texture, taste, we're all just living things in this strange environment. Absorbing everything in a very strange way. We are all doing things to get by, to have a roof over our heads, and food in our belly. We live in a world where beauty is more important than your soul. And what is beauty? It's what society has made it be. What we have adapted to like. And people get judged forever for making mistakes, but the thing they made a mistake on, probably isn't suffering as much as the person who made the mistake. I feel sorry for so many people, and I wish I had no anxiety so I could go and sit next to homeless people and give them a hug and tell them they are just as worthy as the queen. We all have different mind sets, different ways we have lived that have bought us to where we are today, and who we are today. Switch places with anyone's brain and you'd be the exact same as them, so how can anyone judge anyone? Sorry this is a long post, but life is terrifying, all of what everyone goes through, noone needs to feel less than anyone else. Everyone has so much to learn, but what happens with all our knowledge when we're on our death bed? Sorry for this depression, but, life is terrifying.

You know, I went through the same as you - Before my OCD crisis I was a very self-righteous guy who thought the world was black and white. When the OCD hit me I had to open my heart and my eyes in order to survive. It's like a blindfold was lifted off of me. I started to see people as the consequences of things beyond their control and regretted having judge d many people so harshly. One day with a lot of anxiety I went out and gave free meals to homeless people and greeted them. I saw they were not that different from me, life had just put them in a different path. After feeling an overwhelming heaviness of compassion fatigue, I realized that I need boundaries and that I can serve people better if I am doing well, so there is no use in going into depression for the woes of the world. You have a knowledge that only very few people in this world have - You can see past people's actions. It is a treasure - you carry something important. Use for good and don't let it put you down. Your pain can heal the world, through your love.

I understand. I don’t believe it’s right to judge people either. I see people making really poor decisions and get frustrated, but I agree, maybe I would have done the same thing in their shoes. I’m glad you recognize that this is depression. No matter how dull or horrible life can get, it is still so important. I think it’s important that everyone realizes that, even those who aren’t depressed because I believe they will better see the true worth in life.

Wow, thank you so much both of you! Such encouragement and words of wisdom ❤️ that is beautiful what you did for the homeless FormandoV and you're right, we need to feel okay to make others feel okay xx