I feel like I’m on the very edge tip toe of a nervous breakdown but there’s no where I can go. If I go to a hospital I’ll loose my job that I so desperately need. Then what life will I have anyway?
Why would you lose your job? Don't get despair, there is light at the end of the tunnel, my son was really bad and now he is taking medication and he is feeling good... is there a way for you to see a Dr.? You can always get another job, your mental health is more important...sending you blessings I hope you soon find a way to get better 🙏 🙏 ❤️
In my experience, I can’t really show up fully for other people if my mental health isn’t the greatest. I couldn’t really afford to go to an inpatient treatment center for OCD, although there seems to be some great options out there (I have been to inpatient treatment centers for other issues which were really helpful). I decided to just get a therapist that specializes in OCD and start doing ERP. Since I literally couldn’t find anyone anywhere near me, I eventually found NOCD. I got a therapist and started doing ERP sessions twice weekly, and also daily on my own. Over time, I began to get some more relief from the suffering from OCD than I previously had. I went from being hopeless about OCD recovery, to having hope again. If you have the opportunity, I highly suggest getting a therapist/trying ERP if you don’t have the option of going to inpatient/the hospital. I hope this helps in some way!
To add to what Anon said there are also half day options for ERP treatment (IOPs) - there are some good ones.
I totally resonate with this. I actually just had a couple of days where I lost it in front of friends and ended up staying over at their house. My friend has a baby and a husband and she stayed home to help take care of me because I was having such a bad episode. I also felt like I needed to go to the hospital. Try to make sure you’re eating and sleeping. I took a melatonin because anxiety was keeping me up all night long and robbing my appetite. So try to find food you can eat. Broths and liquids usually help me. Try not to skip meals. If you’re truly feeling that bad, you might consider seeing a psychiatrist about meds along with a therapist to help you practice ERP. I hope this helps and I’m praying for you. You’re not alone. Something my fiancé told me, “every storm has an end”. It can feel like you’ll never have peace but it will not last forever. There is hope. ❤️
I started feeling better, more calm and relaxed but then I remembered that I’m literally heartbroken and single and I went back to feeling like shit again, all the anxiety came storming back. Why does it have to be this way, I don’t know what to do with my life anymore.
I can't do this anymore I feel fucking insane my mind keeps telling me I want to k word people and if feels like my mind is making fucking plans. I'm diagnosed with ocd but I don't even know if it's ocd what if I'm just a terrible fucking person that actually wants to do this. My mind is literally telling me to go buy a weapon and hurt people like I get fucking urges. I can't keep food down and have not for the last few days I feel like I need to go to a mental hospital but I don't want to burden anyone in my family. Like my mind tells me specifically I want to do this but I don't want to but recently ive been having the thought of what if I did do it but I don't want to. I just want it to stop I'm a good person I don't want to hurt anyone at all. But what if one day I actually do want to do something. I can't do this anymore.
I’ve recently become unemployed and the journey to finding a new job is honestly unbearable. I struggle with a major lack of self confidence and I don’t believe I’m good at anything nor smart enough for it, so whenever I look at job websites and see different things advertised I panic. Even with what I’ve wanted to do for years, the thought of going out and doing that makes me feel horrendous because I don’t think I’m capable of doing it. And what doesn’t help is the fact I’ve told my parents this and they just scream at me saying I can’t sit around doing nothing every day when that’s already something I don’t want to do. I want a job, I want to do something I enjoy, I like working I do, and once I’m it in I know I’ll enjoy it, but there’s certain things stopping me from going for it. I hate myself over every possible level to the thought of people seeing me everyday is making me panic, I don’t think I’m very intelligent so anything that requires me to do maths or organise numbers or anything like that is out of the question. I’ve worked in hospitality for 7 years, doing shit I despise and I honestly have hated every moment of it so I can’t go back there. It’s all scaring me, all making me feel like I’m just incapable of doing anything right, I genuinely just don’t even want to wake up tomorrow because the thought of living this life for the rest of my life is ridiculous. I don’t want to do it. I don’t have anything I’m good at, there’s nothing I enjoy what the hell am I meant to do with that? I’m honestly so stuck. Everyone keeps saying “beggars can’t be choosers” but this is my fucjing life and I have to do a shit job that makes me want to throw myself off a 30 story building till I’m 70? Fuck no. What kind of life is that? Just so I can make money? And afford bills? And pay to live? wtf I don’t even want to be here so why am I doing that. I don’t enjoy living I a really fucking hate it. And working down the local grocery store is just not gonna make me wanna be here any longer. I really hate it here and now I have to find a job that I’ll hate? I’m so stuck
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