My bf told me if I don’t get better he’ll leave me ? I told him about my intrusive thoughts and they ruin my days and I also deal with depression and anxiety what do I do? I love him so much i don’t want him to leave I feel like shit
Leave him. If he can’t be supportive of you he isn’t worth it. You deserve a partner that loves you for who you are no matter what.
I’m so sorry to hear that. You deserve someone who is gentle & patient with you, and who supports you in your recovery journey. You deserve so much better from a partner and i hate that your bf is making you feel ashamed or like there’s something wrong with you, or under pressure to get better soon. That’s not ok and someone who truly loves you would not treat you that way or give you some type of quasi-ultimatum. Sending care & solidarity to you 💚
Ideally partners are willing to listen about ocd with an open mind and respond in non judgmental ways. It makes sense you don’t want him to leave. If it feels worth it, consider trying to educate him on ocd, explain how hurtful it was to respond like that, and tell him how you’d hoped he would respond. I’m not going to tell you how to be in your relationship, but yeah that’s a pretty shitty response to say the least. Definitely something to consider in regards to moving forward. Anyways, hope I’m not off base here. Hope the best for you on your recovery journey
If he can't be supportive on your "worst" days then he doesn't deserve you on your better ones. At all.
I relate to this so much. I love my boyfriend so much and just recently I’ve been making him upset by constantly asking him for reassurance. We had a big argument because of how I was asking him though. I was being toxic and didn’t believe him and would be angry. But if you are nice and communicating in a healthy way, he should be understanding.
My bf has been the most supportive person ever. I told him about my harm intrusive thoughts towards our daughter. He supported me no matter what. He was open when he said that my asking for reassurance was really bad for us. And was taking a toll on him. We talked it through and he loved me through that. He supports my therapy and helps pay for it. Find someone who understands you have OCD. And that it won’t be easy. They may get upset and frustrated. But find someone who will love you through it.
wow. that’s not something he should say at all. i’m so sorry. as you love him so much he should treat you with all the respect in the world. this is not your fault at all :(
I’m so sorry. OCD is already so painful and hearing that come from someone you love is even more hurtful. I get if he feels overwhelmed with trying to understand and help you with your OCD, but there’s a way to go about it. Does he think that saying he’ll leave you will make you feel any better? This is not your fault and as others have said, you deserve kindness and understanding from your partner. What he said is really harsh and unnecessary tbh. I hope things will get better and easier for you soon 🫶🏽
I'm so sorry and I understand your not alone my life has been turned upside down and inside out because of this EVIL bullshit 😥 If he truly loves you he won't give up NO MATTER what but at the same time WE HAVE TO TRY TO GET WELL so yes we will FALL DOWN but we can't give up on OURSELVES and that's the problem I think many of us give in to the OCD when we have to keep telling ourselves it's just a THOUGHT and it's not REAL so why go any further and follow through by making it worse like doing some type of physical rituals like for me it's cutting my hair for hours and hours and hours and hours 😥 WE truly have the power but we NEED the support and HELP of those around US I believe that OCD is NO different then a addiction that really SUCKS there's really NO feeling good with this so I guess in the end WHY DO IT if only it was that easy UGH 🥴😔😥 YOUR in my thoughts be strong and tell him YOU NEED him and you LOVE him if he's not caring then YOU have to truly think about the relationship in the end YOU have to keep yourself WELL and on track and with negativity and resentment it definitely makes getting on track and trying to be healthy difficult 😔 This I know I deal with it as well in my own relationship my guy doesn't say he'll leave me but he says everything else that can make you feel like shit and then your triggered what a vicious cycle this is makes me cryz PLEASE stay strong for yourself you owe it to yourself....🥹
Having a really bad day with my ocd. Just had a massive meltdown. I’ve had 3 sessions with an ocd therapist and I feel worse. This is very confusing to me. I’ve read online that it’s normal to feel worse at the start of therapy, but i don’t know. I’m asking for a lot of reassurance from people, way more than I have ever done. My doubts and thoughts seem to be getting worse. My mum said if the relationship is making you so unhappy why are you doing it? This was sooo triggering for me but maybe she’s right? She said if I didn’t have the relationship in my life, I wouldn’t be having meltdowns or have an ocd spike, so she thinks I should consider whether to be in the relationship or not! Omg it’s so awful to hear those words. But maybe she is kind of right? If somethings making you anxious or unhappy, you stop don’t you? So why haven’t I broken up with him? That would be the logical step. Im so worried to make myself even more ill so im very scared to carry on with the relationship, because right now, my mind is telling me its the cause of my unhappiness and i would be better without it. But is that my ocd speaking? How do I know?! My life without him would be so bleak, or is it my life without the idea of someone in it? I have so many questions, it’s overwhelming. What if I’m not listening to my gut? Maybe I’m not. That makes me feel sick if I’m ignoring myself again. This is torture. What can I do to stop all these doubts and feel better about things!!! I would love some advice 🙏🏻🙏🏻 (this is my ocd talking, but comments that agree with my ocd are very triggering like ‘yes if you feel like that that is a major red flag’. Just comments that maybe give some hope, thank you 🙏🏻)
I’ve been trying my best with ERP and just everything that’s going on. I have severe OCD, GAD, PMDD, panic disorder, recently diagnosed ADHD, and currently experiencing a major depressive episode. Apparently. I was taking a break from this app but I really need support right now. My family is honestly really mean and not understanding of what I’m going through. Right now it’s gotten bad to the point I had to withdrawal from my last semester of university. My only support is my boyfriend and he’s now planning to join the military. I won’t be able to talk to him for 3 months and I feel really scared of being alone with all of this. I know I shouldn’t depend on him to begin with but right now I’m at an extremely low point and I feel like I won’t make it alone. There hasn’t been a single day we haven’t texted and talked in 4 years. I feel really scared, but I don’t want to hold him back. You guys, I feel so sad and terrified right now. I don’t want him to go, he’s all I have.
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
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