Does anybody deal with thinking everything is cheating like I can’t even look at a guy because I think it’s cheating and I get intrusive thoughts like for example I get one like “he’s cute” even tho I don’t actually think he is and I feel so bad
These thoughts are fueled by your OCD. You have to remind yourself of what cheating really is. There's physical cheating and emotional cheating. Physical cheating is doing anything intimate with someone other than your partner (kissing, sex, etc.). Emotional cheating is usually a secret closeness with someone other than your partner. It involves flirting and sharing thoughts, feelings, and emotions that you should be sharing with your partner). Looking at a guy is not cheating. You are allowed to look at another guy and think another guy is attractive even in a relationship. It's not the thoughts that matter, it's the actions. For example, you can think, "Wow, that guy is hot!" That's not cheating. However, if you went up to that guy and asked for his phone number so that you could text him, that would be considered cheating because your true motive is to gain attention from this guy. Remember, a thought is just a thought. It's the action that you choose to make about the thought that matters!
Having similar struggles as well, one intrusive thought I had that was hard was anytime I look at my girlfriend the thought of her not being pretty or only noticing her imperfections came up, I know it’s the ocd but it does get hard sometimes. But we choose to let them go instead of fixing them, and actually enjoying our loved ones.
Yeah I’ve dealt with this before and it’s ruined some greatly great times in my life. I actually stopped drinking alcohol cause every time I did I had false memory and was worried I cheated on my boyfriend.
Yes. I obsess about things like that. It’s really hard
@fid Yes I feel so bad and just this morning I seen someone and I got an intrusive thought saying “he got finer” witch I never liked him and still don’t and now I feel so bad
@Anonymous Just remember attraction to others in a relationship is normal, even if you love and choose to be with your partner. You choose your partner over the others. Just keep an eye on it but don’t obsess.
@fid Yeah but I dont actually like the people but my mind keeps giving me intrusive thought and besides that my bf got mad at me cause I had a celebrity crush and I feel so bad now
@Anonymous I think it’s important to make sure you aren’t controlled. Some jealousy and insecurity is fine and maybe he doesn’t wanna hear about it or it makes him feel bad, but make sure he isn’t telling you who to look at/talk to/etc and have a conversation about boundaries and control. I’ve been there before. But your situation could be completely different. Love each other, not control or submit to each other okay? Be safe💓
YES BRO
Hi everyone! I have been having a rough time. So my boyfriend talks to his ex still as friends and I’ve been struggling with it lately and I can’t tell if it’s OCD or not but it does feel so distressing. She wasn’t texting him for about 2-3 months as she got into a relationship with this guy and they broke up. She had messaged him saying that she has no one else to talk to and needed to vent to someone. At first I felt okay, but my intrusive thoughts took over and it seemed like she was trying to get with him after the fact. It’s probably just my intrusive thoughts talking but he looks on Discord (the app where the message) constantly now and my intrusive thoughts convince me that he’s still in love with her. Then yesterday I saw one of his BeReals (a little photo app that shows a photo of the day) and I saw that he was watching one of her streams as she is a streamer. I struggled to talk about it because it made my worst thought feel like it came true where he is still in love with her. When we talked he gets a lil mad that I don’t tell him right away like straight up what I’m feeling but it’s hard to process because my thoughts flood in of all the worst things and I don’t want to come off as toxic at all and I know relationships are built on trust and I want to trust because this is literally the only thing that makes me nervous about him. It also doesn’t help that I’ve been cheated on before so I’m trying to protect myself but I’m lost. I get so depressed and so anxious because I feel like I have to grieve the relationship and it’s just so dramatic. I’ve never loved anyone like this before and I don’t wanna lose him by bringing this stuff up constantly when something occurs with his ex. I don’t know why I get triggered so easily and I just wanna heal from it and be the good girlfriend I’m supposed to be 😭
Despite the fact that I have never once acted flirtatiously with someone else over the course of my 3-year relationship, never talked to anyone inappropriately, never touched or interacted with anyone inappropriately, I have been battling constant ROCD obsessions centered around cheating ever since my partner and I got together. I am constantly worried about whether certain things are cheating: daydreaming about another person (already told my partner about this and he said it was okay and that he does it too), talking in a group chat with someone, sitting next to someone, speaking to them in person. I question my intentions. I worry that I cheated by wearing my hair a certain way in an attempt to look more attractive or by jokingly poking someone with a fake sword (despite doing it to other people too), looking through someone’s social media, etc. I have confessed so many ridiculous things to my partner and he’s always told me that none of them are cheating. I feel so guilty for being attracted to someone else, despite the fact that my partner said it was fine and normal. I have made a very very conscious effort to limit my interactions with this person. I never ever ever ever message them privately, I make an obsessive effort to NOT reply to their messages in a group server (constantly keeping track of the ratio of my replies to their messages compared to other people’s), to ignore them when I see them in person and hardly ever speak to them or initiate conversation with them. Yet I still feel like a disgusting dirty cheater who is hiding a big secret.
Hey everyone I know I’ve mentioned this before but, I wanted to share again just in case if anyone new sees this. I deal with cheating ocd really bad, like I always have thoughts about the past and such and get worried about things. I know my morals and values and I know id never ever cheat, but my mind always loves to play the “What if” game. It really sucks. My boyfriend is the sweetest and a god sent to me and he is always there for me but ugh this ocd dealing with cheating and false memory/real events kills me, anyone else relate? I dont know how to put up with it anymore, Just today I remembered I had an old twitter account which is now X, but I remembered I deleted my account a long long time ago but ugh I used to be on twitter so much awhile ago and my ocd acted up and was like “You better go check to make sure you didn’t do anything.” And I remembered I sat with myself and said “I know my morals I would never do that to him.” And then my ocd was like “Are you sure? What if you did?” Etc and my anxiety is now so bad about it now :(
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