- Date posted
- 2y
trust
is ocd linked to a lack of trust in the self? since we doubt everything so much. and is recovery about finding that trust, or about accepting a lack of it?
is ocd linked to a lack of trust in the self? since we doubt everything so much. and is recovery about finding that trust, or about accepting a lack of it?
A lack of trust doesn’t create OCD—that’s genetics or trauma. But it can definitely lower your self esteem and therefore trusting/knowing yourself. All mental illnesses will do that if you don’t have a handle on them.
@Nica true
I think so. I read something which I can’t recall where or if it was ocd related but it described how for some coping becomes very external focused more than interval - seeking answers and coping strategies outside oneself /control vs. strengthening self/trusting in abilities to cope. I think this is often learned or can result from trauma, and potentially some are just inclined to it. Additionally recently read that for people with OCD the perceived/ possible self (what if I do do that, what if I am that) tends to take up more mental space/importance than the actual self and that’s the bases from which obsessions and consequently compulsions follow. Or something to that affect. If I find the links I’ll share, but one of my open questions in therapy (non-ERP) is how to develop trust in self. I don’t struggle with self esteem issues, or much doubt other than around important things where anxiety is blinding but it seems from a need to control external to protect self from bad things, which I don’t feel I can handle.
@Aanoymous very interesting, thank you!
@Aanoymous Interesting! Please share links if you find them. I love the psychology behind it.
@Aanoymous I didn’t fully understand this but I agree with everyone please send links
@Aanoymous I went searching for the article since it seemed interesting to you all as well. It’s here: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/233639190_The_Menace_Within_Obsessions_and_the_Self It’s an interesting idea that while may not change the work of confronting the fears to break the anxiety cycle it may help us see how we got/get into these fears to begin with and may help one create some distance from it.
I would say it also affects trust in ourselves to handle catastrophes!
It affects my confidence and self trust when making decisions
@smileycat7 yes me too. i’m indecisive when making decisions and unsure whether i made the right decision afterwards. or i don’t feel very firm in my beliefs and opinions since everything is subject to doubt!
@garden me too
What if you give yourself permission to do things, because you do the wrong things. I used to give myself permission to look at my fossil watch because I didn’t think I deserved something so nice
thank you for posting this question ❤️ its thought provoking, in a positive way :) lol
@takiflavor ❤️
Yes I want to know this too
Same
Good post. I wonder if there is a link between people with lower confidence and ocd. I know I definitely doubt my ability to handle hard things sometimes.
@Anonymous yeah i think there must be
@Aanoymous, reading this comment help me understand so much about this subject! Thank you! I also had alot of traumatic experiences in childhood/early adolescence. I think this is what contributed to me being like this alot of the time tbh. A good point to bring up in therapy
@Bellaahhhhh I’m with you, even if there is a genetic predisposition, who we are, the copying strategies we developed will more than influence our experience in treatment. Therapist will talk about cognitive distortions but before we get to those I think this concept of our relationship to ourself may continue to make us vulnerable.
So I’ve noticed that my OCD has calmed down, I’m getting less intrusive thoughts but I feel more uncertain than ever. Is this normal for recovery?
I'll start by saying, I have not been clinically diagnosed, as I do not have the funds to see therapists or psychiatrists in my current situation. Once I'm in a better spot, I very much intend to. That to say; after months and months of having issues with anxiety, specifically health related, my partner was the one that mentioned OCD. I did have some somewhat OCD related behaviors in my youth, though those likely could be explained by potentially undiagnosed ASD (as my mother is on the spectrum as well as a sibling, both diagnosed.) But I never considered OCD taking form in a health sense. I posted earlier about how I've had 4 days of pretty minimal anxiety and intrusive thoughts, and it has led me to doubt the OCD label I've been working at treating? I don't want to be the person that identifies themselves with a disorder they don't have, which is why I hesitate to self diagnose with OCD or ASD or anything else. At the same time, I've read that a lot of even clinically diagnosed people with OCD doubt their diagnosis. It makes me wonder if I will always have this doubt, and if that means it is worth it or not to get tested? I know that if I do, they can actually do ERP (whereas I've been self taught and self guided so far) so that would be worth it...
The subject of OCD matters to the sufferer because it feels like confirmation that they are fundamentally unlovable and unwanted—as if even existence itself doesn’t want them. They feel like an error, carrying a deep sense of guilt and shame, as if they were inherently wrong. They suffer from low self-esteem and a deep internalized shame, because long ago, they were fragmented and learned a pattern of fundamental distrust—especially self-distrust. But the real trouble doesn’t come from the content of the most vile or taboo thoughts. It comes from the fact that the sufferer lacks self-love. That’s why, when you begin to walk the road to recovery, you’re taught unconditional self-acceptance—because that’s what all sufferers of OCD have in common: if you aren’t 100% sure, if there isn’t absolute certainty, the doubt will continue to attack you and your core values. It will make you doubt everything—even your own aversion to the thoughts. You have to relearn how to trust yourself—not because you accept that you might become a murderer someday—but because you enter a deep state of acceptance about who you truly are. It’s not about becoming a monster at all. It’s about making peace with what lies at the root of the fear. Making peace with the guilt. With the shame. Making peace with yourself and the person you fear you might be. Because that fear is not rooted in reality. It’s not rooted in any true desire to act. It’s rooted in your identity—specifically, in what might threaten it. That’s what confirms the belief that you are fundamentally wrong. And OCD fuels that belief by using intrusive taboo thoughts to attack your very sense of self. But then I wonder: let’s say, for example, someone fears being or becoming a sexually dangerous person—how could that person practice unconditional self-acceptance? I would never accept myself if I were to harm anyone—the thought alone makes me want to cry. I know it’s not about whether or not someone acts on the thought. It’s about the core fear underneath it. So how do you accept yourself when the thoughts—and the feelings around them—feel so completely unacceptable ?
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