Relationships/marriage

@Isabel Davis Thank you 💋💋💋 just pretty selfish and don’t really wanna do it anymore, and feel like I shouldn’t have even made the promise. Sounds terrible. I’m on 2 meds already so I don’t wanna add any more to my pile lol. Thank you though for your support/advice.

@Nica It was a little joke just to emphasize that it feels like it can’t be fixed

@mattyp I’ve struggled with ROCD yes, but we also had terrible fights before we got married. Then when we did get married, I did feel criticized and judged quite a bit, there’s a lot of manipulation and other people who know our story have told me it’s emotional/spiritual abuse. He isn’t constantly putting me down, but I feel like the longer we’ve been married the worse I feel about myself/question myself, my standing with God, etc. Similar to you I think overtime as each arrow hit, it just has made it harder to come back from you know. I feel pretty disconnected. Our communication is terrible. We’ve done premarital counseling but it didn’t seem to do much. The issues only have gotten worse since getting married.

@K-M K-M im really sorry to hear that. Sometimes it can be really hard to get an emotional abuser to stop or even admit that how they treat you is wrong. My suggestion would be don’t have kids with him if he is emotionally abusive or you really just are that unhappy. We have a kid and it makes it impossible for me to leave. I want my kid to have a two parent home. I would suggest telling him how he treats you with a therapist present and see if he is willing to change. Lucky for me mine is trying. Also letting them know you are know longer going to just take that from them has helped. It took a while because for a long time she couldn’t even admit that her behavior was a large part of my unhappiness. It always turned back to me being mean because I was standing up for myself. Finally I think she understands I won’t take that crap anymore. I moved into our spare room and told her. Therapy or I’m out. She chose therapy thankfully.