Do you have any advice on how to not be too hard with myself? I mean how could I even like myself with having those thoughts and feelings. They come from my brain and cause me so much uncomfort and anxiety, how could I not hate myself for it?! I hate myself for my thoughts, for my feelings, for how I look.. But I'm reading everywhere you shouldn't be too hard on yourself. So any advice how to practice this? Thank you.
Just remember you didn't choose to have these thoughts, it's not your fault: if you had a physical disease, would you feel guilty for having it? Try to be more gentle and kind to yourself, like you would be with a friend of yours if he was strugglingš©· I understand it's difficult, I am always too critical towards myself too, especially when I'm out with my friends, I have the impression of always doing the wrong thing or acting weird because of my thoughts. Learning to deal with ocd is a hard challenge: we should recognize that and be grateful to ourselves for trying every day :)
I love what gre-gre said! Remind yourself that you deserve love, happiness, and to be in recovery no matter what your brain & OCD come up with. Self-compassion work has been helpful for me. It's not something we are taught as children, necessarily, so almost everyone is hard on themselves, but it doesn't do us any favours when it comes to mental illness recovery to best ourselves up. Kimberley Quinlan has great content on her site, Instagram, and her podcast. Her workbook for self-compassion has helped me too (https://kimberleyquinlan-lmft.com/self-compassion-workbook-for-ocd/) Dr. Kristin Neff also has self-compassion content for free on her website (self-compassion.org).
I echo what others have said on self-compassion. I would also say, make sure ruminating on these thoughts about yourself doesn't become a compulsion. I have had some horrible thoughts about myself thanks to OCD like being so disgusted with myself but I realised with the help of my therapist that for me these were OCD intrusive thoughts/emotions themselves, so I used response prevention to not engage with them. Just something to think about in case it's relevant.
I also did a nice meditation for self compassion recently, that was nice for general self care!
A good life, success, healing, beautiful things? ā ļø Important: please donāt read if this is triggering. No one should think this way about themselves, of course you deserve it all. I struggle with real events and harm OCD. My worst fear is being a bad person, causing harm or doing the wrong thing. These thoughts haunt me all the time and cause me to essentially throw my life away. I donāt go out, pursue opportunities, etc. because what if I donāt deserve them? I think of the worst things Iāve ever done all the time. The things that Iām most ashamed of. Like a broken record thatās all I replay in my head. Doesnāt matter if it was 5 or 10 years ago. And I beat myself up for not doing better. And I just donāt know how to move past it. Iāve read a lot of quotes and books about self help and love and acceptance (e.g. once you know better, do better). But for me I feel like I have to hate myself forever. I wonāt ever get a clean slate, thereās a permanent stain on my record. I just canāt forgive myself, whether other people know it or not, I canāt allow myself to move forward. Itās about integrity for me. Does anyone relate? How do you do it? Iām so sorry if youāre also struggling. I donāt wish this for anyone. Please keep fighting, youāre not alone. ā¤ļø
Guys I need help. I feel so alone . Basically I have this compulsion where I feel the need to write everything but this stems from me being anxious about EVERYTHING. Like my mom came in my room and I was irritated and snapped, immediately regretted now I keep writing ādonāt be mean to mom next timeā but I keep thinking about it. Then I think about how I finally left my house today and all the surfaces I touched that couldāve been contaminated and now Iām writing ānext time donāt touch this and thisā. Then I think about all the things I need to be doing for this week and Iām writing ādonāt forget to do this and thisā even though Iāve written it 5 times already. This is what happens everyday btw. My brain always thinks about something I need to be doing and making me anxious that Iāll forget it which is why I write it down on my notes app. Iām sooo mentally exhausted I need help pls!! Anyone have any advice ? I used to think I need to stop the writing but really I need to stop the anxious thoughts coming into my head . People say I need to accept the thoughts and let it go but thatās too hard for me
Iām sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you canāt relate and donāt think youāll say anything helpful or kind pls donāt comment anythingā¦ Iāve been struggling with somethings thatās making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like Iām enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I havenāt done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that itās just wrong this doesnāt make sense to me because Iāve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and Iāve been known that these things are wrong so Iām just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldnāt act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time Iām genuinely convinced that Iām a horrible and itās even got into the point where I donāt wanna be here anymore and I donāt even think this is my OCD :( tbh
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