Depressed about my age

So I am struggling a lot with an issue and I don’t know if it is OCD related or not, but I am always concerned about how people see me in terms of age and I want to be seen so much younger than I am even though I get told that I do look a lot younger than my age and the age that people may say I look is how I want to be treated. Particularly at the residential facility I am going to. I just can’t seem to cope with the age I am. I think this has something to do with how I was raised by dad and unfortunately what my mom tried to teach me didn’t stick. I just feel like I have missed out on my childhood because I didn’t get diagnosed until 16 and that has made me feel awful because I can’t move forward because there is a lot I have missed out on. This also has to do with activities I could have stuck with in the past if I just didn’t let my social anxiety get in the way. I could have had a future maybe in a sport or something so I wouldn’t have to go to college since school was hard for me.When it comes to getting treatment I don’t even want to be in the age group they have for me because I really don’t relate to people my age. Has anyone else experienced this feeling?

AllyJo

Date posted: 2y

Yes! This is different, and I don’t know EXACTLY what you are going through, but I have an idea. I have had a rough childhood and had to become an adult at the age of twelve. I’m a growing teenager that struggles with teen struggles, OCD, and Depression and the stuff I’m going through. My depression and ocd collide and it’s so painful. I get down on myself and analyze every good thing about me down to the last drop until I come to the conclusion that “everyone hates me”. The depression and criticism process is my compulsion because I can control it I just don’t know how and honestly halfway don’t want to. I think that if I ignore criticizing myself I’m just avoiding the truth and it is so penalizing and crippling. I feel like I’m not getting to enjoy my youth because I’m so caught up in my Amygdala. Maybe we could help each other out @Biracialbeauty1

Warriorforever

Date posted: 2y

@AllyJo from Pluto Thanks for responding. I am a lot older than you, but I never got better and it is hard to focus on getting better when you have to be an adult. I feel sick about it really because I am never at peace and I am getting worse as time goes by. I had a great childhood when I was little, but I was shy and was afraid of talking to other kids. I guess we can help each other.

Warriorforever

Date posted: 2y

@AllyJo from Pluto I am sorry you are going through all this by the way.

AllyJo

Date posted: 2y

It will be a part of my life story someday, so don’t be sorry.

Warriorforever

Date posted: 2y

@AllyJo from Pluto I hope we can both overcome this.

AllyJo

Date posted: 2y

We will! I have faith in us!

Warriorforever

Date posted: 2y

@AllyJo I want to tell you that I don’t know if you know that I am an adult and I am 30 years old so I feel guilty about it because I don’t like sharing my age. I don’t know if sharing this is a compulsion or not. Since I don’t have a therapist right now it is really hard. Because everybody is saying I need residential treatment.

Warriorforever

Date posted: 2y

@AllyJo My OCD was tearing me up because of wondering if I did something wrong in what I posted last night. That’s all.

AllyJo

Date posted: 2y

Your probably feel that way because I’m really young. Thank you so much but I’m aware that most of the users here are grown adults

Warriorforever

Date posted: 2y

@AllyJo Oh okay.

shirleyCstar

Date posted: 25w

Advice and Unbiased Opinions Please!!!

This isn’t OCD related so I’m sorry, but I don’t know another platform like this where I can talk to other people and actually get responses. OCD has been a huge fucking setback for me in life. I had to drop classes, wasn’t able to do things, and just felt so shitty all the time because of it. I feel like I blame OCD for everything I’m not. I constantly feel like I’m not good enough. Just today I saw someone I once knew and felt all of those feelings I used to have that made me miserable. Anyways, I tried taking my driver’s test a couple days ago but I wasn’t able to. The DMV only accepted cash. I felt upset but it was whatever. I’m almost 19, and I don’t have a driver’s license. So passing it would mean a lot to me. I compare myself to others my age; they have cars, hobbies, friends, go to college, etc… I don’t have any of that. Maybe comparing myself and all of that is my fault. My family says it’s my fault I’m sad because I just wallow in it. Hearing them say that makes me frustrated and hurt, but maybe they’re right. My mom texted a couple of my siblings in a group chat I wasn’t a part of, “He wants to wallow and be depressed. And woe is me, wah wah wah.” That made me really angry because my siblings were agreeing with her. Maybe they are right. Maybe I am selfish and think the world revolves around me. My sister tells me I need to advocate for myself more, I just don’t want to be a burden. I’ve only been a burden my whole life. My OCD created this whole issue in my family and I hate that. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just want an answer. Am I really a loser? Do I really wallow in it? Am I not trying like my family says? I just want to talk to someone.

gio

Date posted: 22w

21 days till Im 18, I just don’t want it to come

I can’t totally tell if this is an OCD theme or not but I’m shaking and crying and can’t stop thinking about this. I hope that this makes sense, l'm having problems understanding how to explain my emotions anymore because I just don't know what l'm feeling some days, I just don't get it that much. I'm so scared to become an adult. I don't want to not be a kid in every sense of it. I don't feel like I'm an adult at all, it feels like an expiration date in every way. I don't think I have much going for me, l'm not very smart at least I don't think I am. The things I do like don't feel like they are that much to carry me through everything life is going to bring. I feel disconnected from the actual reality l'm living, like I'm just observing it. I just have trouble caring about my future and I have no plans for anything. But time is running out to figure out what l'll do. I would get rid of any of the privileges l'd get at 18 if I could stay at 17 forever. I don't want to loose childhood, I spent my younger years trying to feel smarter than I am and trying to seem like I was mature, but I'm not. I've had really bad things happen when I was young and things I feel like set me back. I don't think I've grown at the same rate as I should have. God I'm so confused. I don't know what to do about it man. No matter how many people I talk to this doesn't stop eating away at me. Does anything I'm saying even make sense? I wish I could stop time so badly. I don't want things to change. I am not ready for it at all.

flyana

Date posted: 22w

Sometimes I feel too old for OCD

Anyone else over 30 and dealing with thoughts that feel debilitating? I know I’m not alone, but I’m curious who else is with me.

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Depressed about my age

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