I’ve convinced myself that I have bpd and major derealization. I went to school today and I was totally spaced out. My life just hasn’t felt real recently like I’m outside of my own body. Help.
Splash some cold water on your face, take some deep breaths, cozy up with a blanket. You got this. I'm going to recommend Nathan Peterson & Ali Greymond (both OCD specialists) on YouTube. They've got countless videos to aid you. I've convinced myself I've had COUNTLESS health conditions & mental health disorders. It happens. You got this.
Ugh, I am so sorry youre going through this. I have BPD and go through this as well and this is a terrible feeling. Something I’ve been trying to do lately is the 5 things you can see/hear/taste/smell/feel to try to center myself back to reality… I also like what the person above said. I’d just try different techniques and see what works for you
I went in and out of dissociation (derealization) for about a month when I was 15-16 years old. It isn’t something that’s happened since, so it was a passing period in my life and I believe it would have needed to be more recurrent to have a diagnosis. I spoke to a therapist about it later on and she told me that what I was experiencing at that time was derealization. It looks different on everyone though. The first time it happened to me I felt like a part of me had lifted above my body and I was on the outside of myself, looking down and watching myself going through the motions. Watching myself walk to class, have conversations with friends, etc, but it didn’t feel like me. It felt like I was an observer to my own life. I continued to have multiple out of body experiences after that. I don’t actually remember much from that time. It took place over the course of about 4-6 weeks and it feels like there are just these black holes in my memory like someone just erased them and I have no idea what happened during those moments. I just remember feeling like I wasn’t real. Like I no longer existed. Like I was some sort of spirit or a ghost and had no real connection to my body or sense of being.
I learned from my previous therapist that derealization is often a coping mechanism that happens when a person is experiencing a lot of pain and suffering. Additionally, I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 disorder a few years ago but don’t know much about bpd. I would recommend that you make an appointment with a therapist who specializes in personality disorders and/or a psychiatrist that can talk to you about your symptoms and experiences, who will know the right questions to ask to see if you really have bpd and derealization or if something else is possibly going on. They could also give you an official diagnoses if necessary. That way they can also help you get the proper treatment and teach you skills to help manage your symptoms if need be. I think the only way you will know for sure whether or not you have either or both of these mental illnesses or are even struggling with symptoms related to them is to directly talk to a mental health professional.
I feel like im loosing my mind. I feel like i experience derealization or what. I feel confused like very very confused. I cant even think normally. Im just tired. I feel like im loosing myself. Im scared that everyone tells me that i have OCD, but what if this is all true? I dont think and im scared that other so-ocd sufferers dont feel this way as i do. I feel literally, LITERALLY so convinced that this must be true. It feels like i already accepted that this is true. Im done. My brain is broken. I even started to have thoughts like what if i have schizophrenia or dissociative identity disorder. Help me please. Do i have psychosis or what?
Earlier today for about a few hours i spent the whole entire time in my room researching a certain topic and feeling 100% convinced it was true and that it was the real me and i never had ocd. There was convincing evidence too. I was freaking out, crying, etc. i hardly remember what i was thinking, its almost like i blacked out. I keep trying to remember because from what i do remember some of the thoughts kinda bother me. I ended up calming down and snapping back into what i think is reality, and felt completely opposite of what i was thinking just 5 minutes prior. Im so confused, i dont know who i am, i feel like im actually going crazy.
I don't know what's real. I don't know who I am, I don't know if everything I believe is made up, all my emotions, my memories..it feels fake, I'm stressed the fuck out because I can't even tell if my past is real
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