One thing that made me stuck in Ocd

Im having this period again where i cant move forward recovery and im stuck. Ocd attacks your values, we know that, I value being a good person. Sometimes im afraid to use disregarding/ignoring thoughts cause i feel like im avoinding a real problem like i disrespected someone and instead of realizing it and apologise, i just ignore it cause it makes me feel bad... I dont made this up, i've seen people on the internet who uses acceptance and ignoring negative thoughts to everything, they use it in an unhealthy way, to make themself feel better,but they never apologise to people or if they realize they arent behaving well, they just ignore it because they dont want to deal with it cause it makes them feel bad... Thats why im afraid to ignore thoughts that stresses me cause im afraid im being a jerk and i dont work on it cause i dont want to feel bad... Ocd made the solution a problem too...

PRIV8

Date posted: 2y

I forgot to say that its a trap cause if i start to figure it out if im being a bad person, think about it then thats rummination, so i feed the ocd more so idk what is the answer

October12

Date posted: 2y

@PRIV8 This isn’t exactly OCD treatment, but…trust the process. Trust that if you truly are ignoring a real issue/event, it will present itself. By the way, this is where I’m at too. I completely get what you’re saying and described it perfectly. I think the difference is when people do things that are truly wrong, inappropriate, etc., they choose denial. Us OCDers are definitely not in denial, rather, we overthink, over analyze, over do it with all of our thinking thinking thinking. And you nailed it; OCD attacks our values! That you (and I) are worried that we were….fill in the black that would go against our values…..already tells me the problem isn’t the problem. It the meaning we attach to the thoughts and feelings. Lean into trust. Lean into trusting the process. The answers aren’t in our heads - our OCD.

PRIV8

Date posted: 2y

@October12 I really like your answer, and that you used the word "denial", it got me question what is the difference between denial and ignoring something, like an ocd thought lets say...

October12

Date posted: 2y

@PRIV8 Denial is literally denying any possibility. I know when I’ve been in denial, I didn’t feel like do with OCD. And when I start to come out of denial, it’s a solid, gut level knowing not attached to any insane anxiety. It’s like truth is undeniable. When you try to deny truth you just feel silly. Take for example, the sky is blue. Now try to tell yourself the sky is actually green. Only in denial, you’ll believe it’s green and when people tell you the truth, you’ll casually go back to, no it’s not, it’s green. Does that make any sense? Like when I’ve told a lie. When I try to maintain that lie, it’s like there’s this voice in my stomach area that is like, just tell the truth and you’ll feel better. And when you tell the truth you actually feel better and stay feeling better. Not go deeper into anxiety/depression/panic. Can you think of times you’ve KNOWN the truth about something? Your values? Who you love? Etc

October12

Date posted: 2y

@PRIV8 And remember, OCD thoughts are JUST thoughts. We aren’t our thoughts. Our therapists wouldn’t be here to help us deny reality. That’s a thought my ocd likes to throw at me. “She’s just trying to get me to live in denial…what if I forgot to tell her something and she would tell me it was bad or a big deal? Why should I trust her? She doesn’t know me.” And on and on and on. Those thoughts give me massive anxiety so I’m learning they are OCD thoughts. Not thoughts worthy of credit and value.

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