Doing ERP on your own? This article might be helpful: https://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/expert-opinion-self-directed-erp/

Trigger warning: How can I do this alone with blood fears. I can't imagine it. I know that won't work because nothing can happen that way. I can't expose myself to random blood that's just ridiculous and unsafe. I don't think I can do this on my own.

That’s a tricky one! And I know this will be a weird answer but from your profile icon it seems you may be a cis woman, so you bleed once a month naturally. Seems like quite the exposure. Is your fear only to others blood?

Also, although you may not be able to expose yourself to real blood, you can certainly watch gore movies, write scripts about blood, visit a blood bank, etc.

Yes, I'm a women but no it is not my blood that bothers me or my children's or husband's...it's blood from an unknown source. I will automatically call it human and automatically believe it is contaminated.

*Trigger warning* I just don't see how any of it will get rid of the fear. I'll still always know how long certain viruses live in the environment. How easily (or not) it is to contract something. Even if I was able to expose myself to tested safe blood or I would always fear the unknown. It's like I have to just accept the risk but I CAN'T. I'm always looking for blood wherever I go to make sure myself or my children aren't potentially exposed to any. I carry peroxide to "test" things I feel could be it to see if I have. I just don't know how to live freely anymore.

It is about accepting the risk, you’re exactly right! And while you say you can’t, it’s literally the only way to overcome your fear. ERP doesn’t erase whatever risk exists, it helps you accept it and deal with it in a more appropriate and realistic way. Checking for blood everywhere, carrying around peroxide, etc. is no way to live. And sooooo many people don’t ever do what your doing and never experience the consequences that you’re fearing will happen.

I know. It's just that tiny risk that my brain had just grabbed a tight hold on. It's the 10 on my hierarchy. It's changed my entire life. I didn't have this issue until I got pregnant with my first and it was a snowball effect from there on out. Saying that to say I know what it's like to live life without it. In a way I'm lucky, I have somewhat of an advantage because I know so many who suffer from OCD don't know life without it. I try to ground myself with that fact, that I lived life normally and for 26 years I was fine but it's still insanely hard to break that cycle once OCD had taken hold. I want my old brain back so badly.

I’ve heard that OCD being onset by pregnancy is quite common. I’m so sorry that it happened to you though. Recovery is possible, but only by doing the work to get there. An OCD specialist is the best resource to achieve it.

Thank you. I'm actually researching to find a an ERP therapist to start seeing now. Actually I kind of have a question about that. There's a place here that specializes in treatment for OCD. on the therapist profiles though they all list CBT. do psychiatrists tend to just encompass ERP in the CBT category? I'd have a hard time believing that a place that specializes been treating OCD doesn't primarily use ERP.

ERP is part of CBT. It’s just one technique of it. I’m sure they do it, but definitely clarify with them if it isn’t obvious on their website.