- Date posted
- 2y
I can’t handle this overthinking anymore- 18+
I’m struggling to allow myself to do anything, every time info I overthink. Last night me and the guy I’ve been seeing slept together for the first time, but for a couple months now after anything sexual I get this overwhelming anxiety. So overwhelming that it sits with me for days. So yesterday I decided after crying and having a anxiety attack that I’d confide in my best friend, I shared some details that were important to the story, but now my brain is telling me it’s wrong of me to have said such personal things even though it involves me. One thing was personal to him and I made sure she knew not to tell a single other person. I want him to trust me I have fallen deeply for him and he means the world to me, but this anxiety it hurts. I want to be able to have fun with him without feeling disgusting and dirty and like I’m breaking some kind of law. Or beating myself up after it. But right now I’m feeling this overwhelming sense of just pure disgust and that everyone is judging me. I’m 21 and this shouldn’t be happening. I have a feeling it’s because my parents have always if it was every mentioned, made sex look wrong. So now I just feel horrid, and I’m not sure what to do