“So OCD”

Not your fault, no one teach people to be open minded/ acculturate on thoose things. I suffer from a chronic phisical disease, and every time i talk about it there is always someone telling me what i have to do to feel better/ telling me how should i feel. And do we wanna talk about all the assumptions about my personality too? Uhhh the time that i heard "uh? It's normal to feel pain we all do sometimes don't be dramatic" "you should go out more" *While i was having a bad bad pain episode* "have you tried doing something instead of staying in bed? Like a run maybe?" YES SUSAN WHAT MAKES YOU THINK EXACTLY THAT A RUN WOULD MAKE ME FEEL BETTER WHEN I CAN'T EVEN MOVE without feeling like if i'm on fire? But again, it's not our fault. They just don't know and grew up in an environment where no one teached them. So you can choose: 1) you teach them: telling how you feel about their answers, and what you would have loved to hear insted / you talk better about what your condition do, how it works etc in an assertive way 2) you don't have to teach them. So simply don't and ignore their ignorant answers I recommend trying the first one only a couple of time with the same person (talking for experience). That's because people that don't live our problems have a really hard time understanding them, and they answer based on what they can "see"/based on their experience. Some of them would really like to be closer and understand better. Some don't. So personally, if I'm in the right mood i give everyone a chance. If i see that they are not listening/ not interested in understanding i simply ignore them :)

I take it with a grain of salt or sometimes if I trust the person I explain a little what OCD is. But it is really annoying to hear that sometimes because some days Im in such pain from it that when someone misuses the illness I dont feel heard.

To be fair, depends on who it is. I often try to educate them if I’m in a good headspace. If I’m not, and let’s say a colleague was to say “I’m so OCD about items facing the correct way” I simply ask them “oh you poor thing, do they have to face the correct way or your *some sort of family member* will be r*ped tonight? No? Then you might just be pedantic”. Usually bringing up a type of intrusive thought which involves their loved one makes them realise the severity of the condition, and it makes them realise it’s not some quirky trait.

I told a good friend of mine that I was diagnosed with postpartum ocd and she said “Well at least you didn’t get postpartum depression and wanna die, I’m a little ocd too”. I just looked at her. I didn’t say anything more. I’m not gonna elaborate

You’re right in the fact that ocd is a poorly understood disease. I have a cleaning obsession and upon telling someone and being open about it their reaction is always “wow I wish I could be that clean.” Or “oh she cleans a lot? Send her over to my house!” It’s honestly the most annoying and frustrating thing and it makes having ocd feel even more lonely. I already feel like no one understands and those comments make it more apparent. These kind of comments and misunderstandings can be extremely hurtful but I try not to take them personally as I’m not responsible for someone else’s ignorance.

This reminds me of an entry I remember in my journal, it was something along the lines of: overheard a conversation between two kids in front of me, and one of them used "intrusive thoughts" in a sentence like, "my intrusive thoughts make me wanna show up at *something* on Wednesday just to see what *someone* will say," (something like that), and in the moment, it made me so mad, but after writing for a minute its kinda clear that (although I do think its annoying that people use terms like that so loosely!) I wasnt really mad at the kid as much as, just mad that I have to deal with what I do. I mean, I start off writing, like, "he has no idea what its like and he never will, and if any one of the people that uses terms like that had to live in my mind and see what its actually like..." and sentiments like that, but after I'd calmed down, I'm like, I'm glad that kid will never have to face what I face. I am happy for him, yk? I'm glad most people won't ever know what its like, because it's awful and I don't wish that pain on anyone. But it's still upsetting that I do have to! And it's a pretty isolating and frustrating thing to hear.

I say actually if you had ocd and give a relevant example of what it would be like if they did have ocd for what they mentioned - like a bank teller saying it’s a little ocd to recount the money once and have the bills in the same direction -I would say if you had ocd you’d have to count it and check it multiple times and an hour later you still might be wondering if you counted it incorrectly. I’m willing to say I know because I have ocd, it it’s not lying to say you know because you know someone with it.