I just don’t know how much more of this I can take. I’m so fed up of the way my OCD makes me feel, plagued with thoughts that I hate my son, I don’t love my partner, I want to die, my life is pointless. I’m trying so hard, I’m doin ERP, I’m trying to carry on my life as normal but I just feel SO depressed. I am convinced that I am stuck like this forever now, clearly nothing is working and I’m just ready to give up 😢
Hang in there! I feel hopeless with my ocd sometimes too. It consumes me. Its like our minds are torture devices. I think people with ocd are the strongest there is.
I agree 100%, people with OCD are some of the strongest minds. We just need to learn the right mental tools to get there!
Sister I’ve been there I’m not healed yet still have a ways to go but believe me it does get better. I was at the point where I didn’t want to eat, go out anywhere, and hated myself. This started around January. And “ended” in March of 2022. However recently i got worse but better. I do less compulsions and the thoughts are less but darker I guess and give me a bad feeling. OCD is full of ups and downs we have to take those small victories and use them as hope. Continue your ERP and idk if ur religious but I’m telling you god is real even when my ODC makes me doubt I still pray and I’ve prayed for strength and wisdom and guidance for u. It’s a journey won’t happen overnight which I know sucks but there are good days ahead u will pull through gods got all of us
i relate to this, almost as if i’m just consumed completely by the thoughts and depression, you’re not alone❤️
i understand exactly how you feel. 💔 it makes it feel impossible to enjoy anything good in your life, like you feel so out of touch with it… it’s hard when you’re constantly trying to fight your mind when you feel so out of control. but you are not alone. 💗 and there is hope, there is healing, there are better days, and the sun will come out again. you are a very strong person to be dealing with what you’re dealing with, and you haven’t come this far and overcome all the obstacles and challenges that you have to just give up now. you are not alone. you are loved and you will come out of this funk. 💕
Don't worry . You will be alright . Work out and find a good solution because our life is really precious and we are blessed to have it .
If you're not already, medication helps a lot with ERP and just letting the thoughts go by. It's worth the price of admission for peace of mind.
@McDucko I am on meds and have tried many unfortunately. However, I have an appointment with my psychiatrist next week and I’m going to suggest trying something different!
I've been there before as well. Sometimes saying your intrusive thoughts out loud (like the ones you mentioned) in the mirror helps make them less feel less "guilty" because then you just heard what you said and realize that's not you. But don't give up!
@Anonymous That’s one thing I’m struggling w trying to do I think ur right though
@Anonymous It feels sort of silly and 'wierd' to do but what you get out of it is so much more. And it all started from practicing speeches in the mirror. That's also how I learned to love myself...looking in the mirror and telling myself I'm worth it. I'm valuable. I'm loved... basically the negative thoughts I would have about myself is what I would repeat out loud in the mirror but the opposite, so I was telling myself positive things instead. I found that writing in a journal and doing that in the mirror from time to time are my ways of expression.
Keep going, it gets better!
I’m in the same boat. Have had a rough ass week but each day will be better. I feel you when you say you are trying hard and still feel depressed and nothing is working. I have felt like that recently but I have just started ERP and changed up my meds so I am really trying to be patient and let things work but it is not easy. Having this sucks and sometimes it just feels hopeless. Just keep doing your thing, you are not alone. You got this.
Change what you say to yourself and try not to use absolutes like "always" or "never". There was a time you didn't have anxiety, try to remember that place. You WILL get on the other side of this and those demons have lost their grip on you! OCD is already defeated, and you have the victory. Your mind will catch up. What's something you can say positively about your life right now?
@Jacquelinda Thank you. I have so many positives in my life, my son, my partner, a lovely house, a good job, a healthy and happy dog but I just feel so numb to everything good in my life
@Ellsx That's the depression side of things, I totally understand, and it sucks. I'm sorry.
Wow I didn’t expect all of these lovely words! Thank you all, it’s such a cruel disorder and one I’m still struggling to navigate and accept. It’s nearly been a year since my acute episode and it’s like a marker point for a year of suffering
@Ellsx It’s been a year for me as well! I was on the same boat as you. I was walking around like a zombie.. I didn’t feel happy with anything around me (family, dog, weather or shows that I loved). Trust you will come out on the other side. I am now in a position I can manage my OCD.. some days I feel normal again and some days I am in a black hole. What I do now is when I have those great days I stay as present as I can and in those bad days I try to remember the good days and have faith I’ll get them back..
I’m crying so much right now. Thoughts about being stuck with OCD forever. My intrusive thoughts aren’t even causing anxiety, they just make me cry. I can’t seem to recognize if I’m doing compulsions. I feel like I’m doing ERP wrong. My OCD tells me I don’t deserve to be happy or to be surrounded by people I care about. I really want this to be over but I don’t see an end in sight. Please God just make this pain go away. I’m so tired. Sorry for such a depressing post on the holidays but I’m just feeling so alone and I feel so lost.
I have been on therapy twice a week for a month now. I am apparently a hard case to think up exposures for. I have done 2 and they seemed so pointless. I need some encouragement bad but I'm not suppose to get reassurance from anyone. It's a very tough situation. My family needs me back so bad. My children, and wife are watching me suffer. It's been a year and I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel. I have been diagnosed with OCD for as long as I can remember, but it's all thoughts. Thoughts of never getting over this extreme anxiety and depression. So I never see stories that I can relate to when it comes to OCD.
This is my first time in ocd specific therapy, even though I’ve been struggling with it since I was a kid and I just feel like there’s no hope and I won’t be able to tolerate the distress of ERP. My OCD is so wide ranging and convoluted I can’t imagine being able to untangle it and actually make progress. It’s making me miserable and has me trapped in my thoughts but I don’t even know how to verbalize some parts of what I’m experiencing. I’m just checking, reviewing and over analyzing everything in my life constantly. My brain feels like it’s on fire and it takes me days to recover from OCD induced breakdowns. I don’t know if I have it in me to work through this :(
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