Wth

So having not even made headway yet with sessions with my latest therapist (not NOCD) she has just left me hanging saying I’ve got too anxious and I need to increase my Remeron before she continues with me and won’t even give me a date to start again……… I don’t really want to increase my meds as it was what she was saying to me in therapy that upset me, or is it really supposed to get worse before it gets better? My career that I worked so hard for is literally hanging by a thread and her doing this to me means I have to stay off work longer and I’m just really upset by her actions and the potential knock on effects of this 😢

I am having an appointment with my psychiatrist this afternoon and I am obsessing about what to do with my medication. I think it’s also very ocd like obsessing. I am currently on 30mg mirtazapine. Ive been on this for years (because of insomnia, anxiety and depression) (15mg) and after we tried to switch to another (amitryptiline) because of nerve pain, I went down the road of insomnia and later on ocd again. So I am back on mirtazapine, and weaning off of the amitryptiline. This is/was a very traumatic experience. Because the switch caused a mental breakdown. Now my psychiatrist has mentioned to up the mirtazapine to 45mg. And my obsessive self has done a lot of research and a lot is saying that the higher the dose, the more you can experience anxiety. And for ocd it’s obviously not the first choice. I am obsessing all morning about it. I am too scared to go up. But I am also too scared to try another and to wean myself of off mirtazapine. I feel stuck at this point. Taking two meds is also not something I want. I could really use some words of encouragement right now I think. 🥹

These treatments are not designed for OCD sufferers because they treat OCD like a logic disorder when OCD is very far from that. Hence why, many patients do not recover with these treatments. ⭐️ Talk therapy involves doing a lot of compulsions like rumination, reassurance-seeking, trying to figure out your thoughts, Etc. ⭐️ Similarly, standard ICBT also involves compulsions such as arguing with your thoughts. For example, if you have POCD, your therapist might say “you know you’re not p*do so just ignore the thoughts.” This is reassurance and can turn into another compulsion called thought-blocking. ‼️A reputable therapist here (Tracie Ibrahim) has told us in a support group that ICBT isn’t even evidence-based (even though people claim that it is) ⭐️ Beware of Instagram “coaches” who want your money and say they specialize in a very specific subtype of OCD (ex. relationship OCD). A good ERP therapist would know that all OCD subtypes are treated the same way so the subtype shouldn’t matter. An ERP therapist should be knowledgeable in all of them because all OCD is just OCD. One of the only things that may differ is the type of exposures you have to do. ⭐️ Also, I suggest you do not use drugs & alcohol as a crutch. You will struggle with your OCD without those, which can possibly lead to addictions. Those substances can even increase your OCD symptoms. ❤️ What I do recommend for OCD recovery: ERP therapy, behavioral activation, ACT, mindfulness, self-compassion, OCD community support, healthy distractions, bonding time with family and friends, and healthy lifestyle habits. These habits include healthy eating (try to stay away from processed foods), going out on nature walks, consistent sleep, and consistent exercise. Let me know in the comments below if you have any extra tips for what’s been helping you through your OCD journey👇