Anger issues?

Everyone is frustrating me at work and I’m about to crash out😭!! Maybe it’s how I grew up and have been gaslit a lot but does anyone ever feel like whatever they do they are in the “wrong?” I don’t know …my coworker made me feel like that. What’s wrong to her might not be wrong to me and vise versa. I just wanna scream and throw hands lol. I don’t know if anyone else feels like this. And they wanna have this conversation in front of customers and then I look like the “bad guy” 🙄. So over it. Workplace is toxic asf and I’m trying to find a new job but it seems impossible these days . I feel like I’m not the best at conversations on the spot. That’s why I keep quiet so ion look dumb, but both coworkers came up to me and approach me. I feel like I try and smile and nobody really smiles back. Or when I say thank you and go to places like ulta, all the girls are bitchy. It makes me think am I not smiling enough? Am I doing something wrong? Etc. Maybe it just the people I’m around . I just feel nothing but anger and I’m trying to calm down but I really just wanna go off

I've been having a really tough time lately with a recent workplace interaction that occurrd today, and my mind just keeps replaying the events over and over. It feels like an endless loop, and I'm finding it incredibly hard to let go. I'm trying to figure out if this intense replaying is more about my OCD, or if it's a typical reaction to a stressful situation that's being amplified by my OCD tendencies. The specific details of the incident involve a colleague engaging in a racially insensitive discussion that I tried to disengage from. Despite my attempts to steer the conversation away and remove myself, the situation escalated with direct confrontation and accusations. This led to significant emotional distress for me. Later in the day, the same colleague misunderstood another conversation, making baseless accusations and publicly confronting me in a very aggressive way. I kept quiet throughout, just a bit of muttering. The emotional toll of these interactions has been immense. Now, my mind is stuck. I can't seem to stop dwelling on every word, every gesture, and every imagined alternative outcome. Hoping I'm not viewed as the "angry black woman" which is such an affair narrative why can't I state grievances of racism, without this narrative. * how do you manage the relentless replaying of stressful workplace interactions? What are your go-to coping mechanisms when your mind gets "stuck" on these loops? * Have you found any specific strategies helpful for navigating interpersonal conflicts at work when your OCD makes it difficult to process and move past them? * When you're feeling emotionally vulnerable due to work stress, what helps you prevent these situations from turning into prolonged rumination cycles? Any advice or shared experiences would be incredibly helpful. I'll be so grateful for any assistance. I just feel like I'm not good at life.

My ex and I were definitely not the best match for each other, even though we convinced ourselves we were for nearly seven years. We said some things to each other we probably both still carry on now. One thing he’d tell me always was that I was mean when we fought/argued. But I only ever got that way when he didn’t listen…cause when I did soften my tone, or showed my vulnerable opinions he never took it seriously. I’ve realized over the years that my OCD usually gets heightened/worse either when I’m stressed, PMSing, or am on an estrogen related birth control. Sadly my life has changed drastically and so near the beginning of this month I switched to an estrogen/progesterone combined birth control pill. It has been great so far, up until this past week. My current boyfriend truly is a saint, and is the genuinely sweetest men I have ever had the privilege of knowing. But, I still get angry. Thankfully I never EVER get angry at him. I will talk my feelings out to myself (like at my job when I’m alone or in the car on the way to him) and work out my anger before I even see him: cause 9/10 times…it’s all in my head, with whatever is wrong. I’m just so worried that 1) one day that angry and mean side of me will come out again. I never ever want to make him cry, or make him feel unworthy (which is how my ex told me how I made him felt) and 2) that he’ll see me for who I ‘truly am’. He swears to me that I’m a sweet girl, and that I don’t have an angry bone in my body. But I see how agitated I get, I see how bitter I can be. I don’t know what to do. I’m so scared of hurting him. I’ve been nonstop thinking about this past week and I just want relief or a break from me.