Should I tell people my intrusive thoughts? A therapist’s advice

It’s only natural for us to tell friends, partners, and family members our strange dreams, unusual events, new ideas, or daily anxieties. Why would intrusive thoughts be any different? For people without OCD, they often aren’t. They might tell a friend about an intrusive thought they had, not in order to get any particular response, but just to share an odd experience. Sharing can be healthy, but OCD often tells people that they need to share their disturbing thoughts in order to get reassurance about them. The problem is that this can become a compulsion—and like all compulsions, it only makes OCD worse. Read more about why seeking reassurance can make obsessions worse over time, and how sharing in the context of a therapy session with an experienced, licensed therapist can be more helpful.

GermanCowboy

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Actually, sharing is a bad idea and goes against ERP therapy. It’s ok to share maybe once just to cope, but be aware that it is highly addictive and a compulsion. Learn instead to sit with the intrusive thought and put it way down in your priority queue.

tuesdaytoucan

Date posted: 2y

@NevadaCowboy Would you say sharing ‘I’m having a tough time with my intrusive thoughts today’ would be better or the same as sharing the thought itself? (Just curious)

GermanCowboy

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@tuesdaytoucan It’s a good way to single out intrusive thoughts as just that. However, it’s still reassurance seeking and still a compulsion if you think about it.

thesa52@gmai...

Date posted: 2y

Thank you!

Phil Brown

Date posted: 2y

OCD is also called the doubting disorder Everything you put your mind to will hunt you. So live with the uncertainty. You will be fine

thesa52@gmai...

Date posted: 2y

I am really sad that I have OCD. It seems to be the worst mental illness one can have

vgb

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Sometimes just letting someone know about your ocd meaning that you just share the fact that you struggle with this can help from feeling ashamed and alone.

thesa52@gmai...

Date posted: 2y

My Intrusive thoughts are ruining my life. I confided to someone my secret ... It's like I was compelled to 'confess' maybe I wanted reassurance that I am a good person who had something bad happen. How can I stop sabotaging myself?

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@thesa52@gmail.com Idk if I got ocd or what have you, but I did this and it sucks. Im sorry I hope you feel better about everything and all.

Anonymous

User type: Staff

Date posted: 2y

I think that a lot of times when people hear about confessing in OCD it is in the context of religious themes or scrupulosity. I think it is important to note that in any theme of OCD, confessing can become a compulsion. Confessing may involve just one ‘safe person’ or it could involve anyone or specific people. Confessing is used as a way to alleviate feelings of anxiety and discomfort. It can provide reassurance and a feeling of temporary relief, but it only lasts for a bit, until the next obsession arises and the OCD cycle continues. Also, I think that it is definitely okay to reach out for support- to say I am struggling with something. A good rule of thumb is "Am I saying this out of a sense of intense anxiety and urgency, a need to know or to feel immediate relief? Or am I genuinely just wanting to connect and feel validated in my experience?" If you are ready to break the cycle of OCD and confessing as a compulsion, make today the day that you decide to not let OCD control your life. At NOCD, our licensed therapists deeply understand OCD and anxiety, are specialty-trained in treating OCD with ERP, and receive specific training in treating children, adolescents, and adults. We work side-by-side with the OCD experts and researchers who designed some of the world's top OCD treatment programs, ensuring the best care for our members. You can book a free 15-minute call with our team to learn more about your child getting matched with one of our therapists and starting OCD treatment.

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 2y

Great read!

vgb

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Interesting

Anonymous

User type: Staff

Date posted: 2y

https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/ocd-compulsive-confession-vs-healthy-sharing

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond