Does anyone else screw up doing compulsions and now you’re scared something bad will happen? Like sometimes I mismatch my “safe phrases” in my mind, and they turn into an unfortunate pairing of words that only fuels the OCD to torture me more with “haha, see? you just said it, you meant it.” I’ll give an example for clarity (not a real one, to avoid triggering) Intrusive thought: You like that person Me: No, I did like them but now I- Intrusive thought: You DID??? You know what that means- Me: No! I meant to say I NEVER liked them, and I DON’T now!! It’s the biggest “And I oop-“ moment ever. (If anyone knows that meme lol). Just wondering if anyone else can relate.

Amalia

Date posted: 6y

It helps me to think of OCD as the devil. God would never want those torturous thoughts for us. If you're not religious, you might try referring to it as a monster. Either way, it seemed to get easier when I put a figure to it and could just get angry about having the thought and quickly dismiss it.

Amber3993

Date posted: 6y

Yes .... at this point I just laugh at all the thoughts I have and It helps me to keep letting them pass by. I would have bad thoughts about God for example that were really disturbing growing up and even now randomly on occasion and I’ll think no God I’m so sorry I didn’t mean that no that’s not what I meant but then I realize He isn’t mad because he knows my heart and it’s just a thought and I kinda just laugh and think thanks for the brain you gave me Lord. Things never get boring in here lolol

Amber3993

Date posted: 6y

Also I have perverted thoughts sometimes about people that come up in my head that go against my moral convictions and I’ll be like I’m in love with so and so wait no I’m not that’s gross wait what?? No what no I didn’t mean that oh gosh did I mean that?... but now I just think wow I’m not the only one who has these weird thoughts .. other people can just blow them off because they aren’t alarming to them but with ocd and intrusive thoughts we have our thoughts provoked by anxiety and then the ocd provokes more anxiety and if we can go in and change the neuropathways through other thoughts that create positive pathways, that way of thinking will eventually take focus and shift from fearful things to more pleasant ones and even if the fearful things persist we can go ok this has happened before and it won’t be the last time it does... this sucks but it will pass. And I’m not gonna lie Sometimes it’s really distressing especially having thoughts that go against moral convictions but I realize now my thoughts are not me

Nickyngo

Date posted: 6y

Hey Amber3993. I also struggle with the same thing as you and I have sexually intrusive thoughts. It’s true that God does know our heart. And he understands what we go through. But at times the thoughts are distressing. Good to hear other people suffering with the same as me!

Anonymouse

Date posted: 6y

Pro tip, immerse yourself around your surroundings and do not bother talking with yourself. It is not bad talking to oneself but for us, it doesn't help the situation.

Cantal

Date posted: 22w

Memory loss

Not necessarily asking for reassurance and I know I’ve mentioned this here before but my OCD has been affecting my cognition seemingly. I’ll forget small things or put things in odd places sometimes, or mix up words - things like that. Obviously this triggers me to be like “Alzheimers/dementia.” Can anyone relate? And if you recovered what did you do for it?

Jabre7

Date posted: 22w

Anyone else have a problem with this?

I can be way too hard on myself and beat myself up over the smallest slip up in regards to OCD. Sometimes it can feel like I'm gaslighting myself on what was "so blatantly and obviously a moral atrocity in thought and intent", when 95% of the time I'm not even sure what my own intent with dealing with these thoughts is or why I do what I do. It makes me feel like some shameless beast for "daring to even entertain the thought of something so VILE!!!" When I just get so confused and scared on moral issues, like my mind is pulled down a rabbit hole I can't escape until the tricks are done on me and it's too late, i've accepted such ideas I hate until that hate and trying to not give in convince me "it might not be that bad". It feels like anything, even the most mundane things can trigger this. This cycle happens mainly because I feel like there's "no way to escape committing more 'attrocities' in thought or compulsion anyway"...and these cycles become the basis for more of these incidents. there a way to stop this? There have been multiple times where I called myself the R word, and even knowing it's a slur I still called myself that because "I'm nothing if not deserving of such scorn". Any attempt to stop the madness makes it worse and it's like all this I talked about is so convincing I dare not question it until after the fact. Please help.

Tulip1234

Date posted: 12w

Religious OCD

What if I just committed blasphemy? In my mind, I was doing compulsions and I accidentally said the Holy Spirit is not of God but of the you know who I don’t even wanna type that on there because I know it’s not true and I’m worried that I committed blasphemy and I’m worried that if I type it, I’ll commit blasphemy I don’t wanna do this I don’t know what to do. I really don’t mean that.

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