- Username
- Cheeks
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Wow! My mind is really blown. "Reassurance is a big part of CBT"??? Not at all my friend. I think you should study more about OCD. What CBT proposes is "talking back at the thoughts" (far from reassurance) , which actually studies have shown that it does not really work for people with OCD, only people with GAD, since it can turn into a compulsion. Hence the rise of new waves of CBT such as ACT, which promote acceptance rather than counter-argumentation.
When you feel relieved through reassurance you are just putting a temporary patch on huge wound - that will only keep feeding the OCD long long term. Now, the line between reassurance and support is very thin - Support addresses the victim (you) and your distress. Reassurance supports your obsessions and its contents.
I think that reassurance isn’t good as a compulsion, but that it is needed to fully learn about OCD. I say this because it is a form of reassurance to learn that these thoughts are not really us. If we don’t learn this, how will we ever know that we can let the thoughts pass because they’re just nonsense?
@FernandoV, I completely agree, asking for reassurance just digs a deeper hole and makes the climb out that much harder. What people should be seeking is advice, and support.
We should use it for supporting each other.
What do you propose.? People tell them to suck it up and get off the app and just deal with it? I’ve studied ocd for years and reassurance is what the territory comes with. Now all the people on here are gonna overthink what you’ve just said and think they’re abnormal which they’re not. Support IS reassurance. I know because I’ve overcome a ton of ocd. Ocd is a reassurance issue as well. Reassurance is a big part of ocd and cognitive behavioral therapy.... if you know anything about ocd... with intrusive thoughts you know that trying to point away and redirect also can reinforce the thoughts as well. It’s a tricky subject. There’s not really a wrong way of doing this... other than idk... telling people to stop reassuring people who are really suffering
Reassurance is not support.
I agree, there are way to many people seeking reassurance. And no one will get better by seeking reassurance. This app should be a place to ask advice, rant, and like @Catlady said, support, not reassurance.
I’d encourage you to study ocd more..... because I think you’re not fully understanding it in its entirety ... also I don’t mean this ugly... but it’s really a painful thing people struggle with as I’m sure you well know :)
I respectfully completely disagree with you. There is nothing natural about reassurance seeking. A person without OCD does not go around asking in a million different ways whether their fears are true. --- Educating yourself and learning how OCD operates in general is not reassurance as it does not address the obsession directly. Unfortunately there is still a lot of ignorance on this and people don't recover faster because of that. I have seen first-hand how feeding the starved reassurance addicts only perpetuates their misery. It is the equivalent of saying that it is O.K to give drug addicts a small dose of dope for their withdrawal symptoms. Yes - it will calm them down for a couple of hours; however the loop is endless.
I suspect many people here are still “coming to terms” with their OCD and thus are only just learning what reassurance means.
Talking about it though is also allowing thoughts to ruminate and so can asking for help. Ocd is very very tricky :... I’d say one of the lesser understood issues people face and at diff levels of severity. Neither one of us are wrong. It is an individual process:)
Our ocd also has a way of knitting itself into lots of our conversations even in asking advice Because our minds construct a lot of false perspectives. For example, I can ask things in such a way that is actually still seeking reassurance or whatever.... our ocd kind of cleverly constructs questions to meet the compulsion.
I guess decades of research and behavioural theory have just being debunked by you. -
How old are you, may I ask?
Asking am I dying? And being told you’re not when you’re in withdrawal, and/or in pain, it’s not the same type of reassurance as asking am I really gay/trans/bi/murderer? If I’m feeling sick, and I ask a doctor if I’m dying, I would love to be reassured, but if my thoughts are telling me that I’m a unicorn and i ask people if they think im a unicorn, I’m in no way making progress. The only time that reassurance was good or helpful in some way to me, was when I found out that I had ocd, so knowing that I was not crazy, and that my thoughts and symptoms had an explanation, was a relief, but I realize that if I want to get better, I won’t be out here seeking reassurance, and how do I know this? Because if reassurance really worked, we’d be cured by now, and all those teens receiving reassurance, wouldn’t come back every few hours after they got reassured with more and more questions.
Absolutely. However, sometimes people constantly seek reassurance to make sure that it's OCD, and then 5 minutes later start worrying "what if it's not?" And the cycle repeats. Health OCD is a tricky one, as if you actually have symptoms then of course a doctor needs to check them and when they turn out to be fine and you get reassurance because of that, that is pretty unavoidable. However, reassurance seeking for every tiny mark or ache or minor symptom is also unhealthy reassurance, which is why doctors mark people down as hypochondriacs when they spot the cycle.
We can all do it! Everyone is going to get over this!
I understand what you mean but with everything it takes time. In any form of counseling yes you will face the fear maybe through erp or other forms of talk therapy. However knowing it’s normal helps and I’ don’t know how bad your ocd is but for me it helped me to have reassurance that it was normal and later it would pass Everyone is individual so let me rephrase:) For some reassurance actually is a great help not for others
Advice seeking can be seeking reassurance though. For me as an individual reassurance was part of the process now I don’t rly ask for reassurance anymore but like I said everyone is different. For me it didn’t hurt me asking a question. Rly what hurt me was being placed on medication for anxiety... tried on 27 psych drugs in two years misdiagnosed bipolar.... stripped off cold turkey 6meds and it mad my ocd an unstoppable force Anyone taking meds please read about meds and what they can do and never stop cold turkey even if a dr says to I took meds as prescribed and when I was cold turkeyed experienced withdrawal symptoms for 6 months, having to reinstate and come down slowly and am almost off all meds For me because of what I’ve been through..... the ocd pales in comparison to what I went through. That’s for me. The meds actually exacerbated my ocd and gave me intrusive suicidal thoughts and all kinds of physical and mental pain I don’t want to write on here because it’ was really severe. Anyway that’s the point of view I’m coming from I almost died... With reassurance, and help from others my life was saved :) Thanks for the input
Amber I think you're talking out of your arse and I kindly request that you get off your high horse. Your first response to me was a load of rubbish. Reassurance is not support and no where did I suggest people "suck it up and get over it". I have studied OCD for years, I've studied various different methods of recovery and I've heard far more people's OCD stories than you or I have had hot dinners. I'm one of the most active members on the UK's number 1 OCD forums, in which I offer scientifically accurate advice on how to get over OCD. Reassurance does not work for some, unless you mean it works for the first week before they relapse in which case yes I'd agree, but that's not effective. All advice I give may seem harsh, but "nice and warm reassurancey" replies aren't automatically empathetic, especially when you know the consequences of the reassurance. I suggest you be more empathetic by understanding that while reassurance may have helped you (and we only have your word for that) it very rarely helps anyone else with OCD.
@Tqh That’s exactly what I meant. There is more than one form of reassurance and it is helpful when you’re trying to understand how the illness works.
You’re totally right, that doesn’t apply to hypochondriacs, I wasn’t thinking bout them.
Also. Sorry didn’t mean to type so much lol As I’ve come off the meds the right way my ocd is barely there anymore
When you’re messed up on meds like I was and I know because it happened to me.... reassurance and my faith was the only thing that helped me.... you cannot say it is not true for someone else because it didn’t help you.
When I wasn’t on meds I could control my ocd and when I was in withdrawal I was burning from head to toe to the bone like I was dipped in acid, so derealized and depersonalized I didn’t know who I was where I was etc every day every second for 6months..... the ocd in withdrawal is the worst ocd I’ve ever experienced and it’s hell on earth. I feel better now on less meds and am almost off them
Human instinct is to want to be reassured unless you’re talking about robot human beings lol:)
For example am I dying? Because in withdrawal and on the pills I was super super sick and that’s an understatement .... asking if I was dying was actually a legit and logical question because the pain was so unbearable . Unless you’ve been harmed by psych drugs I don’t think it will make sense where I’m coming from
Now if you’re talking about from a perspective where someone’s mind isn’t altered then yes it is better to let the thoughts pass and not ask for reassurance. I would say it depends on the state of mind :)
I kind of find it really mean how you’re responding. I almost died because of psych drugs. Research means nothing until the people who actually go through it tell someone what it’s like
Psychiatry is a crock. I’ve seen it hurt so many people and it hurt me deeply. There is no test to actually prove anyone has any of these issues but we know by experience ... experience is authority over theories. Which are all psychiatry is
26. 4 years of my life were ruined by doctors misdiagnosing and overmedicating . Age means nothing. Experience does
Age is irrelevant ... I went through hell on earth and don’t want what happened to me to happen to anyone else. You don’t have to agree or believe but at least be respectful that others are going through hell on earth and accept that they do and just because you didn’t doesn’t mean something didn’t actually happen to someone I have a psychiatrist who has been in this for 70+ years and he has helped me get off these meds. He also specializes in ocd and is very forthcoming and straightforward and is in agreement with me. He has seen more than you and I combined....
Theories. Can you show the definition of that because rly all they are are educated guesses..... and theories are not factual If you’re right then you could just fix everyone here right now....
The human mind is not an exact science and.neither is ocd. I’ve seen top drs in the US and they all say the same. Reassurance CAN and does work for some whereas it doesn’t help others. Then someone will obsess over not being able to ask for reassurance Let me talk about a pink elephant and then you say you don’t think about a pink elephant . It just is what it is. Be more empathetic:)
I didn’t have withdrawal from addiction by the way. You can’t stop taking meds cold turkey or everyone will go through withdrawal. Most if not all go through it after having neurotransmitters altered for a long period of time especially the gaba receptors in the brain
My psychologist is one of the top in the state and she reassures me but also uses ways to change focus of thoughts but to let them pass. There is a cycle that can perpetuate . People can then obsess over their obsessing about obsessing on obsessions I know what I’m talking about because I’m about 99.9% better now
Sorry he’s in his 70’s is what I meant lol! He’s been in it 40+ years! ???
I was simply sharing my experience which has been medically documented and a lot of drs didn’t believe it was really happening so when I asked if I was dying they thought I was crazy. When in all reality what was happening to me was real. Get off my high horse?..... I don’t want people going through the same thing I did. Thanks
I think you’ve sincerely taken what I said to heart and the wrong way. If you knew me personally you’d be like oops.... she’s actually a genuine person who doesn’t want anyone going through the same hell shes been through.
I have been cured of ocd for the most part anyway..... for me ocd actually was heightened by medication and it was really unbearable. My ocd prior to meds was bearable ... annoying? Yes... able to cope.. yes. On meds.... not at all. Thought of killing my self all day but that’s also a sign of withdrawal from medications cold turkey. Sorry if I sounded rude.... I just get really passionate about this whole thing because of what I’ve been through. :)
Also we don’t say arse in Texas ??♀️??
I see a lot of undiagnosed teenagers doing lots of compulsions (without knowing) and asking lots of reassurance here. - This app might be doing more harm than good to them. I can't believe the administrators allow it.
The amount of posts seeking for reassurance is ridiculous, people, if you see posts like that, please please don’t answer their questions, I know that you’re just trying to help, but you’re doing more harm than good by feeding the ocd monster. Notice how people wanting to be reassured are always coming back with the same question a few hours, or days later, so it doesn’t work and it won’t help you get better!
There are so many posts on here now that it’s become quite overwhelming. Some days I can use the app appropriately and get actually helpful information out of it or attempt to offer insight to people struggling. However, lately I’ve found I’ve been using it as a bit of a compulsion to see other people struggling like me to “reassure” myself it’s OCD. But I’ve also been triggered by a lot of people offering others really bad advice that isn’t good for OCD. There are way too many reassurance seeking posts (I know it’s hard, I’ve been guilty of it too). I think I’m going to take a break from the app. My advice to you, stop seeking constant reassurance. Stop obsessively reading stuff related to your intrusive thoughts/worries.
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