- Date posted
- 2y
Anyone Else
My OCD flared back up 10 weeks ago. Massive anxiety,followed by intrusive thoughts and fears. I had been good for 8 years. Then was triggered by a story I heard about a man with ocd that killed his family. I then went into panic mode thinking that can't be right. It doesn't work that way, then started obsessing about the people you see on TV that do that sort of thing and started fearing well what if they are a narcissist with ocd and what if I'm a narcissist with ocd and what if that is what made them do that and could it make me think i want to do that. I've kind of drifted from that Fear and my new fear is, my first major anxiety/panic attack happened when my wife was pregnant with our first child 22 years ago. Back then I thought well maybe it's the pregnancy that made me go into ocd mode. We had 2 more kids after and I dealt with harm ocd with the 2nd child and the 3rd there were no issues. I fear now that what if one day I blame the kids for my ocd and what if it makes me hate them or resent them or not love them or want to avoid them. I love them so much. My life is centered around my kids and I love being with them. How should I go about handling this fear. Accepting it as maybe it will happen or maybe it won't isn't a real option for me. It's so distressing to think of that scenario. Any help would be greatly appreciated