im not getting anxiety from ANY of the thoughts anymore. not even all the secondary questions, is it weird to want the anxiety back? i still dont feel like myself though, and i keep repeating the same mantra over and over in my head.

These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.

So at one point I was glad I was having anxiety/stress about these thoughts but now I feel like something has changed is it normal to not want anxiety and stress even tho it helps me realize these thoughts are not mine. Like the anxiety and stress is doing me no good and it's really messing me up. Is it normal to not want stress and anxiety after awhile or is something wrong with me

My thoughts are here but I have no anxiety. No matter what if I agree with the thoughts it doesn’t give me anxiety. If I think about how not having anxiety means that the thoughts are my truth since I’m not having anxiety. Nothing is giving me anxiety and I don’t know why but I don’t like that it’s not giving me anxiety. Is this normal?