- Date posted
- 2y
F OCD
I have been to SOOOO many therapist been on SOOOO many meds NOTHING WORKS IM SO SICK OF OCD RUINING EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE
I have been to SOOOO many therapist been on SOOOO many meds NOTHING WORKS IM SO SICK OF OCD RUINING EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE
I'm so sorry You are having a hard time, this POS disorder is hard, but remember You are not alone, I promise You, keep fighting it will be worth it, what r u struggling with, maybe I can speak a word of encouragement, I have gone through this a long time, but my experience has taught me alot of things, we are resilient and You will get through this, we just gotta keep fighting, take heart friend, you are not alone, this whole community is here for You!!!
@Danny R Thank you for replying. I struggle with fear of harm and death. I’m always worried someone’s going to die and it’s terrifying
Don’t loose faith. No one is therapy resistant.
@Anonymous Thank you
I so agree, 18 yrs if life in this nonsense ruined
@Alya Aziz Stay strong we got this
Have you done ERP specifically? Im so sorry, OCD is so hard to live with. Trust me I was at rock bottom. But with time I am starting to get better little by little
@Anonymous I have for a bit. Not many in person ERP therapists around me. Keep getting better!
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I feel your frustration completely. I know it seems like it’ll always be this way, but I promise it won’t 🩷 what type of treatment have you done? ERP is the best for OCD, but there are also other options that you can look into. Please don’t give up, everything will be okay
@blazed What are the other options? ERP isn’t doing it
@blazed Thank you. I did ERP for alittle bit until that therapist made me get help for my trauma before continuing. The ERP therapist wasn’t that great.
@Anonymous There’s acceptance & commitment therapy (ACT) and inference-based CBT which are both effective. I’d also suggest trying DBT, however, it’s not an evidence-based treatment for OCD; but it can definitely help bc it teaches you how to regulate your emotions and build your distress tolerance. Also, I did a mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) program (not specifically for OCD) and I found it very useful for managing stress and anxiety, so check that out as well!
@Morgan Were you seeing a NOCD therapist? I'm not entirely sure about this but I think you can do trauma therapy and ERP at the same time; so you could've still continued. But perhaps it's better to focus on one thing at a time. And I do hope you heal from everything you've been through :( stay strong, there's brighter days ahead
Start with, I don’t care. So what. Bout this time mean it. Say I don’t care about xyz. Nothing is as powerful as your brain. No one is brown with ocd. No one can stop thoughts or filter them. We can just give them a certain value. Devalue your thoughts and start living
Don’t blame yourself. This is a process. I’ve been to 4 therapists total and I currently have 2 I work with now (erp therapist + psychiatrist) and I’m glad I found the right professionals to help me. I have tried 4 different medications and I am still adjusting my current dose but I am glad I started to find something that helped me get my life back. We love you and we can all relate.
If I ever experience myself happy in life, my relationship, or friendships, OCD just finds a way to ruin it for me. As soon as life’s going good, it pops up into my head with all these intrusive thoughts that make it impossible to just relax and enjoy myself. My relationship has been improving, along with my mental health, and I have been feeling so in love and present with my partner. Everytime that happens OCD pops back up, with all these thoughts in my head like “What if I don’t really love my partner” “What if I’m not actually attracted to him” then it spirals to “What if I’m gay” “What if I don’t even like men” and it keeps going and going. Now, I can’t even hang around women friends without OCD popping up and saying “What if I’m attracted to them” “You have a crush on them”. I have always identified as straight, and I have always been boy obsessed growing up. I don’t want to be gay and lose everything I have with my boyfriend. That’s a huge fear that OCD is putting into my head. That I’m gay and I don’t actually love my partner and am attracted to him. I’m so upset. I just want to be happy in my relationship and at peace. And I want to be able to make female friends without OCD ruining it for me. :/ It’s like if I’m really stressed, my OCD gets really bad. And if I’m happy my OCD gets really bad. Unfortunately NOCD doesn’t accept my insurance, but I am meeting with a therapist I found on Rula who treats OCD, so I’m hoping that helps. I am also considering meds, because I can’t keep living like this. It’s been 25 years.
I dont know what to do anymore. I think Ive had the 'pure O' version of OCD for more than ten years. I feel like so much of my life has been wasted from this disease. For the longest time I just tried to ignore the intrusive thoughts, and push them off as anxiety, and basically dissociated for years of my life. Feels like Ive just been on autopilot and a shell of myself for nearly 15 years. Its actually hard to even imagine of all the experiences, emotions, connections with others, and personal growth that Ive missed out on- if I do, I think it would be too much to handle. I think Ive even forgot and dont even know at this point what it is to live a normal life and experience positive emotions. Now that I sought treatment for it specifically, it feels like it's gotten worse. Like by acknowledging that part of myself, suddenly added focus just makes it more real and in the forefront now. I wonder if I am actually going insane. Will not go into details for reassurance but the thoughts just rip my soul out. Its so difficult as well because I will get random 'clarity moments' throughout the day where I feel like Ive solved something, then get completely derailed by another OCD thought stream and forget everything. It feels like Im just on a merry-go-round of hell, not going anywhere thinking I am at times.
I’ve recently been struggling a lot with OCD. I have had OCD for a long time I just didn’t realize it until more recently. About seven months ago I developed panic attacks one day randomly at work. I thought I was having a heart attack and went to the hospital where they told me it was just a panic attack and I assumed I would snap out and be better within a few days. However it didn’t. Here’s where it gets scary, I was staying at my then boyfriends house while dealing with blurry vision, anxiety attacks everyday, and more (unsure of what was going on). But at some point I saw my bfs (pew pew 🔫) on his table and it sent me into an anxiety attack after sudden thoughts that I was going to hurt myself with it. I begged him to put it away when I’m not looking so I didn’t know where he put it. He did. These thoughts lasted for about four days but began to go away. (I thought that was it and I would be back to normal). Unfortunately though I ended up moving back in with my family when we couldn’t get my panic attacks under control in time for me to get back to work and pay bills. However, coming home brought up a lot of trauma from when I was kid. My anxiety got worse but I didn’t have those thoughts again. About two and half months ago though, I got sick and went to the hospital where they gave me steroid pills and a steroid shot but sent me into some kind of psychiatric event. Ever since then though, I have been suffering from harm OCD, I have had moments of intense anger that I usually have to completely walk away and go on my own because of how intense they are, and it feels like it’s getting worse. Today I felt fine until about and hour and half ago where I started to dwell on the fact that my suicidal thought was influenced by my OCD and at the moment my OCD is at the worst it’s been. This caused me to get suddenly really depressed and I started crying thinking about how I can’t handle this. I then saw a post talking about how suicide rates are high for people with this form of OCD and it made me question if I am mentally strong enough to pull through this. I fear that at times I’m getting worse. I have good days but I have a lot of bad days. Unfortunately this sent me into such a bad panic attack I went over to my nanas crying about how I can’t deal with this. I took a 0.25 mg Xanax which helped calm down the panic attack portion of it but my brain is still uncomfortably active. I guess I just need hope. I’m so saddened by this. It’s like my life took a total 360 in 10 months and got even worse since the steroid shot. Idk what to do about it. I can’t stop the spiral. I talk to two different therapist weekly and start more next week, making it 5 times a week. I feel no improvements…
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