- Username
- shiv00
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I can relate to this as well! I think HOCD is one that has always come and gone for me but it hit worse than intrusive thoughts a year and a half ago after my husband proposed and I started worrying about if I was making the right decision blah blah blah ROCD and then HOCD got some major hooks in. I started worrying that “what if this doesn’t feel right? Is this how it’s supposed to feel? What if I only think it feels right but I am actually a lesbian” etc. I had recovered really well and then a lesbian started at my job, and I had read a story about a woman who left her husband and took her children to live with this other woman in New York. This new person starting at my job has sent me back into a spiral and I feel like I’m back at square one. I would trade literally any of my previous OCD themes or any other theme in a heartbeat.
I just can’t accept the uncertainty. If it’s possible, it seems probable, and if it’s probable, then it’s definitely going to happen. And I am fighting so hard to not be okay with that. I know it’s causing the cycle but I can’t stop
what does hocd mean?
I do
Can you please tell me about your experience i need to talk about this to some one
I just can't take it
Anymore
Do you want to share your experiences or talk about it
I was suffering from dying ocd few years back and right now i just turned 20 and i am in a beautiful relationship with sweetest girl around 1 month back this question just popped up because i noticed something i dont cleary remember what. But since than i have been in conflict sometime it feels this is all real and i am in denial but my history doesn't let me believe it i did all sorts of things to get relief but it backfired i dont know what is real and what is fake now . I just dont want to leave my gf.
I’m so glad Lauren said she has dealt with this since being young because I remember being younger or in high school maybe and actually hearing about lesbians and stuff. I just always worried that there’s no way that it could’ve been OCD because if it was then it wouldn’t keep coming back, so clearly I must be in denial about something.
Actually it is a mental illness it can reoccur like hocd or some other ocd which our brain wants to obsess about
Well then I also tell myself “what if it never went away? What if they weren’t intrusive thoughts and just the real you that you’re in denial of”
Anyone here who is a Christian and deals with or has dealt with hocd? If so, how do you deal with this biblically?
I’m so exhausted. Been having HOCD since May & had it once before when I was 15 - both times began as me genuinely thinking I was questioning my sexuality, then it became obsessive and that’s when I landed on HOCD. It was more like HOCD that actually questioning. But I will say I do find women attractive, and have always watched lesbian porn & in my mind I guess I do find women’s body’s somewhat sexually attractive. This being said - I have always had boyfriends, always fell for boys and not once have I ever been genuinely interested in a girl or fallen for one. I’m 20 too, so it’s not like i’m only 14. In very open about sexuality and accept everything and everyone, so the idea of being lesbian or bi isn’t alien to me. Some of my friends are gay and lesbian . Earlier this summer I even started coming out to people as maybe being bi, and i was almost pushing that label onto myself to try and accept myself - but it still didn’t feel right and I am still unsure and uncertain. Just want some advice - is this similar to other people’s stories ? Not looking for reassurance, just genuinely wondering wether it is HOCD or maybe I am just abit gay hahaha (which would be okay, just doesn’t really feel right)
Hey guys. i’m a 14 year old female and i think i may be struggling from HOCD. My reason for this is because i really struggle setting aside thoughts about my sexual orientation. Growing up i always wanted to marry a man and have kids but up untill now there’s something in my head telling me that i don’t want to do that and i’m making it up. i have all kinds of intrusive thoughts about s€xual intercourse with girls and even just being in a relationship with a girl and they have become that common it’s like in my head that i’ve accepted it and my head is tricking me into the fact i like it, when in reality i don’t! there’s so much more to this but all i want to know is is this HOCD and i’m not in denial? pls it’s causing me so much distress, i’d appreciate any help! <3
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