- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Omg! I used to have this with my ex!!!! You’re not alone... I think OCD can take a genuine subconscious suspicion and turn it into a full on ritualistic obsession. Perhaps your skepticism is warranted, but the compulsions around it aren’t, you know? I suggest having a candid conversation about your feelings with him. For example, “I fear that you’re interested in other girls and it’s causing me anxiety. Do I have reason to feel that way?” I also suggest that you stop doing the checking. It’s a form of seeking reassurance, and it won’t help mitigate the issue. Good luck :)
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Wow... idk if this is a “sign” that you replied to my question but your username is the same name as my dog who passed away last month. Although sad, I actually smiled. Thank you for your advice. We have talked about it and he’s somewhat understanding to the best he can... but it’s honestly SO difficult to resist/ignore the compulsions. Especially when I text him, and he doesn’t reply ... I’m always waiting and checking and waiting and checking to see when the response comes through. And if he doesn’t reply then I go and incessantly check social media !! It’s so consuming
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m so sorry to hear about your dog ? I’m glad I could make you smile, though :) I’m glad I could pay some unknowing homage. So of course it’s hard to resist checking his accounts and stuff. Any compulsion is hard to fight off. But maybe try limiting yourself first. Like “okay I can check his Instagram 3x a day” if he doesn’t respond to your text, but you’ve already checked 3x, you have to resist. It sounds super silly, but retraining our brains is kinda just part of OCD even with the little stuff. Do you think you could manage something like that? (Obviously doesn’t have to be my example)
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’ve tried so many things... 1. Putting my phone on “do not disturb” - so if any notification (not necessarily from him) comes in I’m not immediately grabbing my phone to see 2. Putting only HIM on silent / hide notifications 3. Completely deleting all my social media platforms for two months to entirely rid of any possible way to engage in compulsions and reassurance seeking It’s exhausting... almost like i know to engage in the compulsions is bad but I do it anyways over and over agin
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Do you think that at the root of the issue there may be some anxiety about the relationship in general?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Definitely a lack of trust that exacerbated the ocd... and we’re really working on building that trust back ... but I’m more so just trying to find a way to resist/stop worrying about what he’s up to in order to not consume my day!!!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Have you explained the OCD part of your relationship anxiety? Like have you told him about the compulsions?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yah briefly, and told him the reason I went on a social media hiatus months ago was BECAUSE of my compulsions
- Date posted
- 5y ago
i am going through the same thing.... i’m a lesbian and my girlfriend is pansexual, so sometimes (most of the time) i am so scared she’s going to cheat on me with a guy, or another girl, or whatever’s in-between. i don’t have social media (besides this, but i’m not sure i count it as such as no one knows me and i like it that way) but she has twitter and i’m constantly checking on it! i get so upset sometimes when i see her interacting with others.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w ago
Hi, I’m new here!! I’m praying I don’t get judged for this. But, back in late May of 2022 ( literally right before I graduated high school), I added this one random girl from my school on Snapchat. She posted something about a graduation party , so I swiped up on her story basically saying how I can’t believe we’re almost graduated. She replied and we had a really short and simple conversation. The next day ( i believe) , we started talking a lot , and I just so happened to see her at the highschool when we were grabbing our graduation outfits and doing the rehearsal. When I saw her irl, I kinda got turned off ( I heard she was kinda crazy) , and on top of that , she was a little ugly irl. I remember seeing her Snapchat bio , and she was close friends with my female cousin ( a year younger than me) , who I happened to experiment sexually with when I was 10-11 years old. I remember going to work later that day and having sort of a lightbulb flick thought ( it wasn’t a good thought though) , what if my cousin told her about what happened when we were younger? So I started to kind of panic and immediately distanced myself from that girl. I also experimented sexually with one of my female friends when I was 10-11 , and from that day onwards, I’ve been pretty much living in paranoia and a little bit of guilt about someone finding out and my life being ruined . On top of that, It’s gotten worse to now sometimes I wonder if a girl I added off of quick add ( Snapchat) is underage even if they told me they were 18+ or had 18 and above in their bio, and I get so much guilt and anxiety about that. I even had a quick thought last February on what if I did something inappropriate with my younger cousin when I was 15-16 but I just can’t exactly remember when it happened , and it still eats me alive when I think about it, because I don’t know if it happened or not. I’m sorry for the long vent, I just wish I felt normal again. No matter how much I try to do things that old me used to do, life always feels “ off”. I always kept the top part about when I was younger a secret up until early (ish ) 2024, then I vented to one of my best friends and he told me that that’s a normal thing to do at a young age. Since then, I have told multiple friends and they all say they did similar stuff, but my brain just can’t accept that. Please help me, I quite literally overthink everything nowadays. 2021 was the last full year that I felt normal ( coincidentally, the best year of my life so far) . It’s not just about sexual related things either, sometimes I’ll wonder if I messed up something at work or hit a car while driving/hit someone and drove off. I just wanna live my life how I was supposed to live it after highschool ( carefree and happy) before whatever it is ( I think it’s ocd) hit me unexpectedly. Thanks to anyone who read this , I just needed to pour it out regardless of how negative I felt typing this, I hope someone can relate , because I feel so alone in my head at times.
- Date posted
- 12w ago
I’ve been struggling with something that’s been really overwhelming, and I’m hoping to get some perspective from others here. I feel a lot of guilt about it, and I’m not sure if I’m alone in this experience. Lately, I’ve found myself daydreaming about romantic situations or getting caught up in ‘what if’ scenarios—where I wonder if I could develop feelings for someone else, or if someone develops feelings for me. The thing is, I’m in a relationship that I love, and I don’t want to act on these thoughts at all. What makes it even harder is that these thoughts often hyperfixate on one specific friend, and sometimes they feel entertaining or give me a dopamine rush. But then, of course, I feel even more guilty because it makes me feel like I’m betraying my boyfriend. These thoughts usually happen when I’m upset and looking for comfort, but then they morph into romantic scenarios, which makes me feel so disloyal. I’m constantly going back and forth between feeling curious or entertained by the thoughts and then feeling horrible for even allowing them to happen in the first place. I keep confessing these thoughts to my boyfriend, and he tries to be understanding. He’s just never been the type to daydream, so he doesn’t know if this is something other people experience or if it’s just me. I feel like such an awful girlfriend. Has anyone else dealt with something like this?
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- Date posted
- 10w ago
Very brief mentions of pocd and nsfw jokes,id like this to be adults only . Repost bc i had to edit something Does anyone have experience with real event ocd attached to your online footprint etc? I keep checking old messages,trying to find old people i knew i used to talk to etc. To find out every problematic thing I did and if I've ever been unfollowed or blocked by anyone I used to be friends w online/atleast on good terms w. I am particularly concerned abt doing something bigoted,esp racist bc i have racism ocd,and doing something predatory bc of my pocd. I remember hanging around people who could use 'edgy' or offensive humour in my teens and i remember a lot of sex jokes and that i would join in on sex jokes sometimes . i dont remember details w the offensive humour as much,i feel like i didnt join in on it as much but i was definitely WAY passive abt things and prob let a lot of bad stuff slide i shouldnt have bc i didn't speak up it was wrong,I remember one friend in an online community would say slurs and horrible jokes when i was 16. I dont remember my response to it as much but i feel i didnt speak up abt it aside one time i found in the dms where he made a bad joke on a thing i shared for social justice. I cant stop going thru old messages and stuff or trying to find ppl from the past. I feel like if I don't check it now,that eventually it'll come to haunt me or that I'll stumble across it eventually. I worry what if someone messaged me on one of these apps I un-installed or on one of the accounts I don't have access to,confronting me abt all this stuff I did. I had an obsession w this back in 2020 and did check in depth on all my accounts,but now that it's been 4 years the obsession is back in full swing.
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