OCD & Trauma advice

Hello everyone! Recently I’ve felt and have proven to be conquering OCD, but in my last therapy session my therapist stated that if I want to be who I want to be I will have to address my childhood SA trauma. She says I have OCD and it’s influenced by the trauma. In that therapy session I learned that for me everything is connected. But it makes me so sad, I thought if I can get these thoughts under control everything will be fine and my anxiety will subside. After that therapy session I haven’t done ERP practice. And I felt like I’m forgetting my responses to thoughts. Im leaning into compulsions more like all my progress has been “deleted”. I just want a path like a step by step process. The thought that I have is “if I do these steps and instruction then I’ll get to a place of peace.” I thought I had one but now I feel I can’t see one anymore. Has anyone had to maneuver through both OCD & trauma? If so any tips?

MichelleV

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

I have been doing ERP for a year and 7 months here with NOCD, and 7 weeks ago I started trauma therapy with another provider. So I can speak to my experience here. Where I struggled, is that before I started the trauma therapy, I thought I was turning a corner with my OCD. I was overcoming some major exposures, and things were looking up. But then I left my 13 year relationship, and my world shifted again. My anxiety flared up a lot, I was having strong intrusive thoughts, and it was hard to sit with the uncertainty. Some old compulsions came up for me, in the time between leaving my relationship and starting trauma therapy. My therapist told me that ocd will flare up when you have high stress levels. And it sounds like your ocd is wanting you to have control again, especially if you go into a new unfamiliar process (addressing your trauma). I want you to know your progress wasn’t deleted. Lapses are normal in OCD recovery. You still have the tools you’ve learned, and your progress won’t disappear. I can relate on wanting a clear path, with a step by step on how to heal. But you’ll find your place of peace, even if you’re confused or lost. I will also say that my ERP therapy is helping me as I do my trauma therapy. I can use my ERP tools of sitting in discomfort, confronting magical thinking, and accepting that I don’t have control always. For me personally, there were many times I wasn’t sure how I would get through certain exposures, or therapy overall. But I did, and that experience is guiding me now through my trauma therapy. If I have a day where I’m not sure what’s next, or how I’ll process some things, I’m reminded that I’ve felt this way before, and I got through what I thought I couldn’t with ERP. So, my advice to you, is to recognize and lean on your strength. Recognize your progress with your OCD, and know that you can get through addressing your trauma. I am so sorry you experienced it. Know that even if the path forward has discomfort or uncertainty, you can handle it, because you do so already in conquering your OCD. Talk to your therapist about feeling like you want a step by step-they should be able to help you with that. I wish you the best.

Me.13

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@Anonymous Thank you so much for your kind words 💕I really appreciate it💕

peaks&valleys

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

I relate to this. For me personally, I’ve found that my ocd recovery made leaps and jumps forward after I acknowledged and accepted some difficult moments in my past. Once I accepted that some of these things happened and gave myself the space to feel the feelings, ocd had way less power over me. Your progress isn’t deleted. In recovery, we will inevitably go back to our old ways a little bit every once in a while. But then we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and keep on doing the work. You know who you really want to be - you’ll need to go through some uncertainty and growth to get there. You’re more than capable

Me.13

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@Anonymous Thank you so much. 💕 I know I am capable I’ve felt the progress. But the setbacks are just so jarring to experience. I’m so glad that this app is here cause I felt alone in my experience. Thank you again!

Lean_into_th...

Date posted: 23w

OCD/Trauma/Depression

Hi everyone. I haven't posted on here in quite in some time. I'm hesitant to post but I'm battling some things that are compounding onto each other. I've had ocd since 15 I'm 30 now..I feel it's still there but much better than years ago. Currently though I'm really struggling with depression and trauma too. Atleast I believe it's trauma and my psychiatrist saw some indicators. Long story short I was in a relationship with a narcissist and I'm still recovering. I feel my nervous system is still kinda on fight or flight. I've learned that our bodies very much stores trauma. Alongside this I'm pretty critical of my appearance and my self esteem is not so great. I've been putting myself out there more and socializing but I can't shake this feeling of being stuck in an endless loop. It's hard to tell what to tackle. It's difficult for me..I don't know if ocd treatment is for me or more so trauma based therapy. I think there is some overlap..any advice or feedback would be appreciated. A side note I've done ERP in the past and I've been to treatment centers such as mclean. I feel like I need a community because I feel pretty alone but I'm having trouble putting one foot in front of the other.

SunnyAnon

Date posted: 23w

dealing with OCD flashbacks 18+

i currently am getting over my period and have been having a horrible flashbacks from some real events. it’s a amalgamation of all of the horrible things i did as a child/young teenager. all of it associated with p0rnography + sexual activities i did. i was exposed to sexual activity very young and it lead me down a dark path. i’ve had OCD forever it seems. it’s hard because i can see that i’ve had OCD symptoms since childhood but i constantly doubt wether or not my actions where because of OCD or something i genuinely wanted/was attracted to. i can’t seem to differentiate the two and it’s scaring me. i’m worried i was genuinely into the kind of stuff and it’s constantly flashing in my mind the last two days of things i compulsively did years ago. to be absolutely clear it has been years since i’ve even thought about those taboo things or saw anything of that sort. i’m talking 5 or 6 years give or take. it still feels like yesterday. in recent years i’ve completely pulled away from p0rn and now find it and s3x a lot less appealing. but every so often i get these intense flashbacks on things i did or saw or thought and it puts everything on hold. everything im interested in gets but on the back burner in fear of my intrusive thoughts being thrown into the mix. currently experiencing that now. im mortified of ruining everything i love because of these stupid thoughts. does anyone have any advice or experience with this specifically and have any tips???

Lemon22

Date posted: 21w

Need help starting!!!!!

This my first post and frankly I am so scared. I was diagnosed with OCD as my first diagnosis, at only 10 years old. Ever since, my OCD has COMPLETELY overtaken my mind and actions. Im scared that if I ever get my OCD figured out and under control, I may loose a part of myself, because its so familiar to me and all Ive ever known. As someone who is ready to tackle their extreme OCD thinking, where should I start? I am open to any/all suggestions. PLEASE leave any advice that you recommend and that has benefited you in your own journey!!!! Thanks!

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