Testing

my appointment with the psychiatrist is months away and still need to confirm everything but after talking with my therapist last night I just feel even more scared. Like scared I'm not going to provide enough info and then she'll tell me that nothing is wrong then all of this is for nothing. Of course, id love for there to be nothing wrong with me and to feel none of these things that have been bothering for so long. But the fear of being told that there isn't when its causing so much worry... it's making me really anxious. But it also makes me feel guilty because I feel like I'm just looking for attention or making something out of nothing. Even though I know very well it isn't nothing. I know that people sometimes take years or even decades to get help or get a diagnosis that actually fits what they've experiencing and im scared of that too.

2 days ago I decided that I will do my bloodtest, last time i was in 2017 and for some reason when i stood up I started to feel dizzy and I couldnt see anything, I didnt fainted but i was close to it,the nurses quickly layed me down, and then i was fine, but the whole day my body was shaking. I was afraid of blood test, and i always avoided it, but my health anxiety got worse cause i was afraid everytime that i have cancer but i cant check it cause im afraid of bloodtests. This year i had to do other medical tests and now they asked me to do bloodtest too, and 2 days ago i said okay this week i will face this fear. And i felt excitet, motivated and happy that finally i will face my fear. I did not cared if i faint cause it might not happen but if does I can handle it, i will feel good after i wake up. But someone after some hours, the fears came up, and i wanted to face them (cause people say you need to challenge the thoughts) so i tried to challenge them and find ways that i will handle those scenarios, but after time i got stressed cause i didnt know how to respond. If i faint and then vomit and feel sick and vomit alot of times cause im also panicking to the point they have to take me to the hospital... this jist scared me. I dont know how to handle that panic. The body will react to the blooddrown so either way i will feel bad. And im afraid of it and I cant deal with that fear.I dont know what to do if i will feel sick the whole day, if i will vomit the whole day and faint because of stress. This might be catastrophising but now these thoughts comes up, if i imagine myself being there and getting my blood drawned, i imediatelly feel the panic and these scenarios come up and then i dont know what to do so i just panic... Last night i asked help from others and it helped that some said that its pretty rare that you will vomit after blooddrawn, people who do are sick already or they are really scared. And this made me feel good but then i read about it and i found out that its pretty common that people faint, or vomit or fo both after blooddrawn... and now im just thinking about not going... i cant deal with it cause idk what to do. Breathing techniques didnt worked for me, if im panicking and i try to relax by breathing, i get more stressed cause my brain knows i do it to calm down and the panic is a danger so i get more panic... idk what to do.

17f So I don't have an official diagnosis, but I know I have it, I struggle with it since I was 4, I went through like almost every theme like contamination, symmetry, checking, existential, health anxiety, false memory, moral ocd, sexual ocds, and also a therapist told me I have it (another one said I have generalized anxiety disorder but idk like I was talking about textbook ocd to her) I don't have a therapist now therapy is not working out well for me but I was hoping to maybe get medication For me the absolute hell is POCD and real event ocd. I genuinely don't know how do I start. I also think I will replace POCD with harm ocd cause well I'm to scared to talk about POCD. But what do I even say like do I come in and talk about more obvious ocd stuff I experience and then randomly jump to POCD, seems like a crazy jump idk... Also I thought it will be in the evening and I will have time to prepare but it's in and hour and a half I'm terrified Anyone? Help? How do I start what do I say I'm so scared