Hi great community! i would like u guys to share some experience when doing EPR for harm OCD. like how to do it properly for the first time and what to expect. im going to try my first time soon but a little guidance from u guys are extremely awesome! thank you!

Just expose yourself to a certain obsession and sit with it. Don't do the compulsion. You'll see after hours or even days you stop worrying, fear will subside and your body and brain will learn that your common sense was right. There was no major imminent threat ;) trust me. Just don't do the rituals and u get better. With these more and more experience you'll have shields against future obsessions and will recognize them quicker so they won't become time consuming compulsory shit show :)

Thank you so much for the advise. How are u now compare to the time u haven’t expose ur self? are u a person who was so anxious and worried and fearful all the time?

I have it all my life. It came and went, came back and went away a bit, came back stronger... ultimately it got worse gradually over decades since my childhood. When u don't know what u have you react naturally to fears: you avoid situations you fear altogether or try to neutralize them similar way they confront you. But that, exactly that, makes it worse. Our ocd brains react to minor anxiety fears disproportionately, way exaggerated... we have to be mindful of our gut feeling and thoughts all the time to not get stuck in yet another compulsion before we even are aware... It's exhausting but they will creep into you in a different or completely new form if you are not going to be aware of your feeling, thinking and doing... I had Y-BOCS results indicating I was severely affected by OCD. I did ridiculous, time consuming, repeating, compulsions all day long. Now I still have loads and heaps of obsessions but mostly they have no chance taking over anymore.

http://www.wsps.info/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=136:how-to-defeat-ocd-by-surrendering&catid=0

Another Way to Think About ERP: Think of your anxiety as an alarm system. If an alarm goes off, what does it mean? The alarm is there to get your attention. If an intruder is trying to break into your house, the alarm goes off, wakes you up, gets you to act. To do something. To protect yourself and your family. But, what if the alarm system went off when a bird landed on the roof instead? Your body would respond to that alarm the same way it would if there were an actual threat such as an intruder. OCD takes over your body’s alarm system, a system that should be there to protect you. But instead of only warning you of real danger, that alarm system begins to respond to any trigger (no matter how small) as an absolute, terrifying, catastrophic threat. When your anxiety “goes off” like an alarm system, it communicates information that you are in danger, rather than “pay attention, you might be in danger.” Unfortunately, with OCD, your brain tells you that you are in danger a lot, even in situations where you “know” that there is a very small likelihood that something bad might happen. This is one of the cruelest parts of this disorder. Now consider that your compulsive behaviors are your attempts to keep yourself safe when that alarm goes off. But, what does that mean you are telling your brain when you engage in these behaviors? You are reinforcing the brain’s idea that you must be in danger. A bird on the roof is the same as a real intruder breaking into your home. In other words, your compulsive behavior fuels that part of your brain that gives out these many unwarranted alarm signals. The bottom line is that in order to reduce your anxiety and your obsessions, you have to make a decision to stop the compulsive behaviors. However, starting Exposure and Response Prevention therapy can be a difficult decision to make. It may feel like you are choosing to put yourself in danger. It is important to know that Exposure and Response Prevention changes your OCD and changes your brain. You begin to challenge and bring your alarm system (your anxiety) more in line with what is actually happening to you.

Source: IOCDF

Prevailing theories indicate that OCD is a biological disease. Functional brain imaging studies have produced a model for pathophysiology of OCD which involves hyperactivity in certain subcortical and cortical regions. On the basis of imaging studies, Insel has proposed that inappropriately increased activity in the head of the caudate nucleus inhibits globus pallidus fibers that ordinarily dampen thalamic activity. The resulting increase in thalamic activity produces increased activity in orbitofrontal cortex, which, via the cingulate gyrus, completes the circuit to the caudate and produces increased activity in the head of the caudate. Hypothetically, primitive cleaning and checking behaviors are "hard-wired" in the thalamus. Insel's hypothesis is supported by evidence from MRI (magnetic resonance imaging) studies, which have found an abnormally small caudate in some OCD patients, and by positron emission tomography (PET scan) studies, which have found increased metabolism in orbital frontal cortex, cingulate gyrus, and caudate, with decreases following successful treatment. The association of OCD with Tourette's syndrome and Sydenham's chorea, which are believed to involve basal ganglia pathology, is also consistent with this model. In the section below, we have outlined a more detailed description of the various theories and hypotheses involved in the biological basis of OCD. As will be noted by many readers, the information provided here is more suited for clinicians, medical professionals, or others who are more familiar with medical terminalogy. For this reason, readers are encouraged to seek further information from their physicians/psychiatrists and/or other OCD resources.

source: OCD Stanford university education

So act unnaturally to your anxieties, to those you recognise as ridiculous and confront them, sit with them, endure them. Don't avoid compulsion inducing situations - Don't react to obsessions with neutralizing compulsions. The feeling of anxiety will vanish and instead you will have a feeling of such relief that you have one less compulsion over an obsession which won't be vanished immediately maybe BUT which won't have the upper hand anymore ;)

thank you for the source. would like to share my experience with you. my brain is always focusing to worry as if nothing is right if i dont worry. telling my self not to worry is just going to bring me back to the cycle. my brain is used to think of the harmful thoughts. as if i will act on it as there is an urge. that is like my default mode now. anything i do from time to time im aways reminded by it. im so confuse..if i do the opposite, wont i just reinforce the memory by provoking it? i can be more specific. im afraid of balcony, i think u get what im thinking now. how do i start provoking my brain to start training? by thinking ‘i could go crazy and jump down’ ?

So you have harm ocd?! For example: start with a little thing, not with the balcony. Maybe you are afraid of harming yourself with a needle. So you avoid needles. Now, you place a tiny needle next to you and don't avoid it for minutes, hours, days. With time you won't be afraid of that needle anymore, because you learn that you didn't harm yourself with said needle... why didn't you hurt yourself with the needle? Because you never wanted hurt yourself in the first place. You're just afraid you might do it. When you're conquered minor obsessions, you will feel you can take on the balcony. So you go on a balcony first floor. Until you're not afraid anymore. Then second floor. Then third floor. You learn you didn't jump so you can increase the height... You get what I mean? Now- I am no trained therapist. I am j u s t a sufferer myself. So I am not legally authorized to give you therapy. It's just my experience, what I learned, what helped me and others.

Fantastic explanation by Katie D'Ath: https://youtu.be/zCqA5Ua3OVA

Hierarchy model. How to label your different minor to mild to severe (balcony) anxieties: https://youtu.be/TftHDYFS8-8

Where to start with erp

https://youtu.be/GXoGlpd00Co

Thing is, you can have 10 therapists but in the end it's you yourself, you alone having to do the work, the exposure and response prevention all on your own in your daily life. Only you yourself can make you better I'm the end, but use all the resources you can get to learn about OCD, like this app and its community. There is also a lot false information or half baked information out there. So be aware. A lot who write about it, don't really understand it... Understanding is key. Like everything else... As I'm writing I experience obsessions but I recognize them and can ignore them. It's unnerving, but liberating at the same time.