Could someone who’s had success with their treatment explain how it’s supposed to feel when you start accepting the presence of the thought and sitting with the anxiety?
Honestly I won't sugar coat it. It feels like hell going through erp and everything. Sitting there, trying to accept thoughts or resisting the thoughts saying you need to do this or that. When you get better at it, and it does take practice, it gets easier. You'll lapse less and less, sometimes have a big lapse but it'll be less frequent. Once you get to a point, you can pretty much shrug it off like it's nothing. I'm aware that a single thought could lead to a relapse but that doesn't cause me stress. Being on the other side of it all. All that discomfort and stress in getting better was worth it. If I ever do relapse, I'll go through it all a million times to get better. It's completely worth every single struggle. I promise you. I didn't know my mind can feel this clear or peaceful as ocd was all I remember. Felt weird and alien at first but its calming. Like floating in a swimming pool with the sun shining down on you, or leaves been blown on the wind on a hot day, or even inside a cabin next to a fire whilst under a blanket with a hot chocolate. It's nice. You guys will love it. I bet my life on it
@Invalid Yah each time I try, it just makes the thoughts seem more real and then I get terrified. I am trying to stick to it but it feels like I’m doing the wrong thing or that I won’t be able to handle it.
@Catlove9 I 100% agree with @Invalid. I don't think you are doing wrong. This is how it's supposed to feel. I do want to add, if you feel too overwhelmed and need help, please reach out to your therapist or a supportive person and let them know what's going on.
@JustAlli I agree with this. Therapists will know how to structure erp and if you have a supportive person who's willing to help occasionally, educate them on it and they may be able to help you structure erp "exercises"
@Invalid Thank you! I have had these moments for like 45 seconds and then I’m like, “wow! I’m recovered! I can’t believe I believed all those thoughts and symptoms. I literally feel like a huge weight off my shoulders. Then, I promise myself , “I’ll never believe ocd again!” After those seconds, I’m back at it again, with a vengeance !
Following because I also can’t seem to wrap my head around this! I read somewhere that knowledge and understanding are two different things and I’ve never felt that so much than with OCD! I have the knowledge, but I can’t seem to understand how I can apply it.
In my experience (not a professional), sitting with your anxiety and thoughts can be one of the most uncomfortable experiences you can have. Sometimes accepting a thought would worsen my anxious feelings. Then, I begin to let go or even forget about it completely. I'm still mastering this, but it does work. In my opinion (again, not a professional), if it feels like it's making your anxiety worse at first, then you're probably on the right path.
@alliw281 This definitely does happen. Honestly I feel like my anxiety has gotten worse and I’m feeling more hopeless.
@Catlove9 I think that is completely normal. It gets worse before it gets better. OCD is basically an unhealthy coping mechanism. Through ERP you are unlearning what your brain has conditioned itself to do as a form of protection or even survival. You will feel threatened when accepting the thoughts and anxiety because your brain has conditioned you into thinking that acceptance is a threat and its going to send you warnings as if you are in true danger. Your brain just needs to learn that OCD is not protecting you and your thoughts and anxiety are not actually a danger to you. It's very much a fight between our conscious selves and our caveman brains, but I believe you can conquer it.
@Catlove9. You can also message the advocates. They are very helpful. They've been through all of this themselves. But what everyone has said is correct it feels awful when doing it. I did ask an advocate how long before she saw results and she said you don't need to compare your recovery with anyone else's. Everyone is different.
Everyone's journey is different. Completely agree, and you can go at your own pace
How long does it take for you to completely get free from the thought and the anxiety? Approximately how long do you have to sit with it before you are free from it for that time?
Those of you who have overcome at least a bit, if not all, of your OCD. When you went through the CBT and ERP, did it feel like the end of the world? And how did you face the fact that your fears and uncertainties might actually come to life?
So you got to ask me anything… Now I’d like to ask you something! I’ve heard from Members that they were so scared coming to their first ERP session. They were terrified that I would think they were crazy, that I would tell them their worst fears were true. That I would confirm they are some form of a terrible person or have them hauled off to prison for their thoughts. I’ve also had Members share how they’re very scared to begin ERP treatment because they’ve researched enough to know it means facing the fear, without the compulsions that have kept them feeling safe (but not really safe) this entire time. They struggled to see how they could be capable of doing this, while simultaneously acknowledging that they did not want to live like this anymore. If you have had your first session, what were your thoughts before? Did you have any hesitations or fears going into it? How did it turn out? If you haven’t yet begun to work with an ERP specialist, what is holding you back?
Can someone please tell me at what point did you finally accept that it’s OCD? When did the ERP click for you? When did you just stop buying into the lies of OCD and finally let go? Like what does it take. It’s been 2 years of this for me and I’m in ERP currently and it’s just not clicking 😣 is it just me???
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