Username: K-M

Date posted: 1y ago

Quitting a job

Who has quit a job due to a hostile environment? I worked as an in-home caregiver for the past 5 years which I absolutely loved, before that I worked in only restaurants. I moved in September and my client’s mother had retired so my hours were shortened. I decided to get something easy/part time so I started serving again in a restaurant. I’m a sensitive person as is, but I have one specific coworker who is a bully to me, a manager snapped at me and I cried, I avoid another manager cause he is mean, and another said the F word to me cause I dropped some scallops lol. Maybe they are small things and I am overreacting, but like every day before I go in there I am low key like hoping for someone to pull something so I can just leave. I woke up with anxiety looking at what time I start today. Idk why I’m having a hard time pulling the plug, I have only been there since September!! I look at my coworkers and I’m like how have you guys been here for years? Is no one seeing this? Any advice or just feedback would be great lol.

Username: Curtis Devon Curtis Devon

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

I'm sorry I thought you quit if you didn't quit you should. Make sure you have another job first before you quit.

Username: K-MK-M

Date posted: 1y ago

@Curtis Devon I appreciate your feedback! I’m a licensed tax preparer and was planning on leaving by January 15 anyway to work in my family business, so I would technically just be leaving early. I just care about leaving on somewhat of a good note because there’s a finer dining restaurant upstairs that I wanted to apply to after the tax season.

Username: organizedchaosorganizedchaos

Date posted: 1y ago

I had to walk away from a very good job I had been at for 12 years. My anxiety was so bad just knowing I had to go to a toxic environment in an office. One day I just decided to put in my notice and I walked away for my mental health. My mental health and well-being had to come first for me. I took a huge pay cut and lost great benefits but I had to move on. Hope this helps.

Username: K-MK-M

Date posted: 1y ago

@organizedchaos This helps incredibly thank you!

Username: Wolfram Wolfram

Date posted: 1y ago

I'm not one to support avoidance, which is what I was thinking halfway through reading but yknow what? Healthy boundaries are healthy boundaries. I'd almost see it as a golden chance to do ERP. Lots of little things you can practice there. You mentioned you know you're sensitive, do you ever see it as an issue for yourself? Just wondering if you wanted to relate to someone or seek advice. You're not alone BTW but there's loads of different reasons people quit for hostility. It's not a black and white though

Username: Curtis Devon Curtis Devon

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

You did the right thing by leaving. Never tolerate being disrespected by anyone. A toxic workplace is never worth staying and putting up with unnecessary stuff when you don't need to. By the way it's ok to be sensitive

Username: 777Q777Q

Date posted: 1y ago

Personally if at all possible trying to hang in there , while quietly looking for another job might be a good option, as long as you are fundamentally safe that is in spite of the negative atmosphere. Much can be learned with less than optimal conditions. Jobs are a little hard to come by I have been finding that out myself the past several months.

Username: K-MK-M

Date posted: 1y ago

Not so much an issue, but I do wish I can brush it off instead of crying in a bathroom after my coworker is a jerk to me for the millionth time lol. My husband kind of turned it around that maybe it is just me that can’t handle it or something? Because everyone else just deals with it, and they have said the management are “a-holes” and they just work there lol. I guess I’m not used to working in that kind of environment.

Username: Wolfram Wolfram

Date posted: 1y ago

Do you mind going through the bathroom crying incident? What did the coworker do and how you got to the bathroom, what you were thinking at the time ? Literally no judgement at all, and if you don't want to say I completely respect that. I just wonder if I maybe able to help you, if you want it

Username: K-MK-M

Date posted: 1y ago

@Invalid Sure! Well my coworker has consistently treated me like crap, talked down to me, kind of like I’m stupid. I made a mistake yesterday so he threw in his comments about what I did wrong, how I should’ve known, etc. I think it’s like the combination of everything that just made me want to go cry in the bathroom. I’ve had to confront him twice before because of the way he speaks to me. He’s been nice to me for maybe 2 weeks or so since then, until yesterday. Last week I got snapped at by the manager and I cried as well, and he told me to stop crying. Lol

Username: Wolfram Wolfram

Date posted: 1y ago

@K-M Have you tried the maybe, maybe not approach with the thoughts that follow? And sorry you've got that environment at work. I'd usually ask if they're OK and if everything is OK at home. If they snap I'd follow with, if you want to talk I'll listen. Depends on how you'd feel about it. I've also followed with, stop, I'm human and I made a mistake and you've made your point clear, I don't know what's going on with you but I don't deserve to be treated like that. If they get all defensive I just walk as I've said my bit. You can't rationalise with irrational people.

Username: Curtis Devon Curtis Devon

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

You're welcome

Username: Wolfram Wolfram

Date posted: 1y ago

Walk to the toilet *

Username: ??

Date posted: 4y ago

I need advice. Should I quit my job? Its making me very depressed and anxious everyday. I'm a cashier at a grocery store. I've been there for almost 4 months now and I thought it would get easier but it hasn't. Customers are so rude and it makes me feel like shit about myself. I also feel like a failure for not being able to handle it:(.

Username: donutmonster

Date posted: 1y ago

I might be making fake scenarios in my head. OCD?

I feel like no one at my job really likes me. I pitched a movie screening idea in a group chat and still got no responses at all. It’s a movie that I thought resonates with what we stand for. I want to quit. I told my mom about it but she said I can’t just quit every job that doesn’t make me feel comfortable. It makes sense. I just feel out of place. I already screwed up because I would at times, not show up to a few events. I wouldn’t show up at times or leave early because I felt overshadowed by a coworker and it probably wasn’t her fault but in my head, I kept trying to avoid her and avoid that negative feeling of hating myself even more. It started when I assumed she was flirting with my bf which made me feel intimidated and anxious around her. I ended up overdosing because of it. I kept having images in my head of bf and her together and it would break me. I would end up making myself smaller and crying. Me and this girl also seem to have some unknown beef with each other. I also don’t know if this is in my head but I noticed some passive aggressive behavior and it fucks with my head. I would leave events early because she was there, would steal the show and it would stupidly make me feel unworthy and invisible. I just have past experiences in relationships where similar stuff happened. I got called out for leaving early and told by an employer I’m not really doing my job because I flake. I work for a center on my college campus and would pitch ideas for events and post on our social media page, but, never really stick around at events due to feeling uncomfortable around the girl. I end up crying internally then I leave early to cry more. It’s ridiculous. So, I think they all just dislike me because of it. I can’t tell them why I act like that. I’m seeing a therapist and she told me this girl isn’t a big scary bear. I’ve applied to many places so far and have yet to hear from some of them. I want a new job.

Relationship OCD

Username: Magzzz

Date posted: 44w ago

What is wrong with me?

At my workplace, I have these so called “friends” or used to be “friends” that I have tried so hard to be friends with and be there for an all I’ve ever gotten in return is hurt, put down, ignored, left out, and talked down to. There’s a girl I work with and used to be friends with that acts like she’s better than everyone else and gets my other so called friends to believe her lies and she purposely tries to leave me out and makes me an outsider when I used to be there for her but she’s always been mean in return but she makes me out to be the bad guy or the problem. She has even said I’m a problem and that everyone agrees with her. I have quit from this place before but I came back because it was convenient since I’m in college and they work with my schedule. Management won’t do anything about it because of favoritism. I tried to warn my best friend about her and other people but she wouldn’t believe me and before I quit she turned against me just like everyone else. Then when I came back she acts like my best friend again because the girl that treated me like crap gave her the same treatment when I was gone and now the mean girl is I guess trying to get her not to be my friend anymore. I don’t know what to do. These people make me want to give up because I feel like my existence is the problem. That maybe if I left they wouldn’t have to worry about me anymore since they shun me and treat me like I’m the worst person ever. It’s so mentally exhausting and it’s painful because I’m a very overly caring person and I used to be a people pleaser but now that I have kind of gotten more boundaries and protected myself, it got worse. Am I the problem? What is wrong with me? I honestly don’t even know what I ever did to these people. I have an attitude sometimes but it’s because of the way they have treated me and that’s honestly all they have ever said was my issue and I have apologized countless times for the things I’ve done wrong because I have held my self accountable but they haven’t. A couple years ago I liked a guy that started working there but then she started flirting with him when she knew I liked him and now they are dating so that tells you how that went. He was like my best friend and when I tried to warn him about her, he turned against me too. I don’t know what to do anymore. Any time I would speak out against her she would say I’m a problem and that I’m acting like a victim but all I’ve done was try to protect myself from how she’s treated me. I can’t make friends anymore because I’m afraid they are just going to do me like she did. I don’t know if I’m the problem but they make me feel so angry and I can’t do it anymore. I don’t know if this even makes any sense but if anyone relates or can help I appreciate it 💔

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Quitting a job

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