Do I have OCD???

Hi idk how to start this but Im a 16 year old dude any My therapist says I have PTSD, Panic Disorder and maybe ADHD. Im pretty sure Im autistic, same with my mom and brother and many other family members. for years now ive had my friends telling me to get checked for OCD and im starting to think they might be right. anyways, for one thing, I get like really bad intrusive thoughts. Its really hard for me to be around kids, I cant stop thinking about horrible things happening wether its me messing up and hurting them or me hurting them on purpose, usually sexually. I have always been overly concered with seeming creepy in romantic relationships. Ive only dated one person younger than me EVER and its one of my current partners (polyamory) and shes a day younger than me and even that makes me feel like a creep whos taking Advantage of her, I cry if I sit with my partners while they sleep and im awake becaude im scared im going to hurt them, I wont Initiate intimate acts at all because If I do I will cry because it cant not feel like rape to me if I initate. Numbers. Holy shit the numbers. I count my steps, I count how many times I adjust my hair, I count how many food items im eating, everything. and If I dont I feel like Ive done it wrong somehow. I have to press the crosswalk the right amount of times or i feel like ill get hit, I have to wash my hands using the right amount of steps and repeating them the right amount of times or Ill get sick and Ill throw up (I have ptsd from a major sickness when I was a kid, and my triggers are almost all related to throwing up). I dont know if theyre intrusive thoughts, but I also get intense images or thoughts that are so intense I think they are real, of me hurting myself, hurting others, throwing up, other throwing up. I think it is worth mentioning that I have HPPD, and some pretty intense Halluzinations from past psycedellic and delirent drug use. My have bad memory from using but even before then Ive always thought that maybe Im not remembering right and I freak out about it and ask family if im tripping myself out or i remember it right. Idk theres definately more to this that i dont feel like typing, I just want to know if Im tripping myself out or its actually OCD, I want to know before I being it to my parents or my therapist. Help!

Username: LikeAnOnionLikeAnOnion

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Yeah, that’s OCD alright

Username: TapDrumRollTapDrumRoll

Date posted: 1y ago

There are many levels of autism. So not sure about the autism. But for OCD the Yale Brown Obsessive Compulsive Scale would be used to see if it’s ocd. They would have you fill this questionnaire out and that way they can determine if it’s ocd and see how much you do suffer on a daily basis. I’ve been diagnosed with many things throughout the years and then other doctors will rule them out and years later another will rule them back in. We are very complex, all of us. They can’t hang one title on us really. I cant speak of the sexual part. You are young, teen years are tough years for all people though. We are just coming to grips with who we are and what we like and who we like and are attracted to. What attracts us changes and morphs as we get older and experience more relationships. You may be attracted to older women in 10 years, so it’s not a bad thing to be attracted to younger people within reason. Our brains have plasticity, meaning we can always improve it. We build new synapses and neurons when we learn new things, meet new people and exercise our bodies. Make learning new things a habit. Puzzles, reading, painting, foreign language a job that challenges your brain, those things help your memory immensely. Because I have done hallucinogenics in my teen years, about a dozen of times & pot for years after that. I realized by accident that after learning to paint, learn how to play an instrument, read books and remember peoples names, that my brain was changing and holding on to events, names, and enabling me to make better decisions and be more analytical and have more patience to pay attention to details. If you don’t feel comfortable with your doctors opinion/diagnosis then try another. I also think that fact that you are concerned about the sexual thoughts is good thing. I’m not saying obsessing about them is good for you. But if you think you are bad and are horrible, that is very rigid label you place on yourself. You will be limiting yourself from enjoying any relationships if you just cease to have them. So the alternative is to have the relationship and learn about yourself, learn about what/who you like. If it feels uncomfortable, then give yourself permission to step back for a bit, ground yourself and try again. That is only my opinion, I am not all knowing, but I am in my 50s and have some experience in life. I hope some of this helps you.❤️

Username: JenniesOCDBrainJenniesOCDBrain

Date posted: 1y ago

hey there, i just wanted to say that it sounds like you're going through a lot right now, and i'm really sorry to hear about the struggles you're facing. i suffer from pure o myself, with different obsessions, but i totally get how overwhelming and exhausting ocd can be. just know that i'm here to listen if you need to vent or talk about what you're going through. so my therapist told me about this free ai ocd therapy tool called "unstuck" (www.AIOCDtool.com), and i thought of you when i heard about it. given the intrusive thoughts and compulsions you're dealing with, like the counting and the intense worry about harming others, this tool could be a game-changer for you. it's designed to help you break free from ocd by guiding you through the steps you'd take with a trained therapist, but it's an ai that's available anytime you need it. you basically type in what's bugging you, and it walks you through the process, just like an ocd therapist would, to help you manage those overwhelming thoughts and urges. i really don't like when people push apps, but i'm bringing this up because it's genuinely helped me out and i just want to pass on something that could make a difference for you. if you have any questions about how it works or anything, i'm happy to chat. remember, you're not alone in this. 🌟

Username: AidenHeph420AidenHeph420

Date posted: 1y ago

I went through all of the intro stuff but it makes me pay to use the app, and I dont really have money like that :[

Username: JenniesOCDBrainJenniesOCDBrain

Date posted: 1y ago

@AidenHeph420 - ah they must have changed it then :/ you used to be able to use it before needing to pay.. but also i think if you just reach out to them they'll give it to you at discount or for free!

Username: katee.evans29

Date posted: 1y ago

i need help

hii everyone, so, it has been about 2 or 3 years I’d say since I’ve been dealing with this. let’s just get right into it, so first, whatever I have (which might be OCD, I’m not entirely sure what it is) has taken over basically most of my childhood, and what kills me is that I’ll never get it back. one thing I know is that im not normal, i now get sleepless nights. why you may ask? because of my horrifying thoughts, “if you don’t look up you’ll be praying to the devil and you’ll go to hell!” “if you don’t say ‘God bless them’ their condition will happen to you!” “if you don’t say ‘good yetho 2x’ (idek..) ‘your mom will die 5x’ you’ll die and forget how to read. “if you don’t put your arms up, look directly up at the ceiling because if you look down you’ll pray to the devil so you need to look up, and say ‘Dear Heavenly Father, I pray that you forgive me for my sins in the name of Jesus Christ Amen.’ you’ll go straight to hell!” or whenever I touch a wall, i need to touch it with my small finger because if I touch it twice with my pointer finger my body will go to hell. it’s an endless cycle, and what’s even worse is that I may never be able to get help. I’ll never get that life back that I wanna live, and it kills me. I’ve named most of the compulsions and obsessions I have and I have 18 compulsions that are physical and about 5 obsessions that I really don’t wanna name right now. anyway, i really don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve done a lot of research regarding around disorders, and it’s safe to say that I may have OCD. Now, do i want ocd? absolutely not. however, there’s a family member in my family who has it. so the chances of me having it are strong, i don’t think I’m able to get better until I’m 18. an adult. I’m 12 years old, my mom has noticed my compulsions and me repeating certain words. but she does nothing, absolutely nothing. instead, she just argues with me over it. if I ever tell my mom to sit down and ask her about getting a test, she would probably call me the R-Slur and tell me I’m crazy. Therefore, I’m all alone in this situation with no one to help me. another obsession I have is about me catching cancer if I don’t do a compulsion or I might get paralyzed and get sleep paralysis. It’s so horrifying, there’s more obsessions and compulsions I have but I really don’t wanna name them right now. I cry almost every day because of how exhausted I am, and how much help i truly want to get but I don’t think I ever will. I’m unsure whether or not I have ocd, people tell me to get a diagnosis. but the situation I am in right now makes it impossible. i have no way of getting tested but I have a good feeling I have ocd, if you’re reading this, please try to give me your thoughts and what I should do, and if I even have OCD. Thanks! :))

Username: kaylee00229

Date posted: 35w ago

Do I have OCD?

I’ve always had a feeling of having OCD but I’ve never been sure. I’m a teenager, and I’m hoping people on this app can help me try to figure out if I have OCD or I’m just crazy. Starting off with these terrible thoughts I have all the time. Someone can come home late and I immediately think they got into a car wreck, and check my phone for recent car crashes and other thing etc. etc. number 2, I always have intrusive thoughts, terrible ones ever since I was a kid I can’t control. I immediately feel like thinking these will lead god to hate me, and that he made an imperfection on me. And every time I try to hide these thoughts away, like right now they’re coming out I just can’t stop thinking of them and it’s so hard to do anything. Just thoughts like, “you hate your mom” or, “you hate god” and stuff that scares me like spiders. It’s hard to do anything with these thoughts. I’m also a major perfectionist, if anything is out of order I freak out. Yes, my room is messy. But I feel a sense of incompleteness and anxiety if I don’t empty the dishwasher, or don’t clean dirty dishes around the sink. These are recent and I feel like God will punish me for committing the sin of laziness. I also have a thing with the number 5, when I touch something it needs to be 5 times and if it’s not 5 times I freak out. I’m also terrified of getting sick, every time my friend is sick I freak out and don’t get near them the entire day, constantly washing my hands. Writing this is triggering a lot of my terrible thoughts and I don’t want to continue writing. Please let me know your thoughts, mental illness runs in my family but my mom is constantly telling me there’s nothing wrong with me. Maybe she’s right.

Username: CD…

Date posted: 34w ago

I’m not sure if I have OCD, but…

Hi, I’m Cede. I am 15 years old and I’m greatly concerned if I have OCD. I do so many things that relate to others with OCD, and find myself constantly matching symptoms of it. But I feel like if I bring this up to my mother she will tell me I’m making it all up in my head, or say something stupid like “it’s because of that darn phone” I was hoping to find people here who do have OCD and see what their thoughts are. And hopefully find my answer. These things have been happening as long as I can remember. They started out as a few things but now they’re building and getting worse. Stuff I do that I believe is OCD related: -When I was younger and believed in good and praying, I would have to triple check I prayed for all my family and friends. Or I thought they would die. I would panic every night. (Age 4-9?) -When praying I would also pray that specific things wouldn’t happen to me. Ex: “dear god, please don’t let me get kidnapped tomorrow” -I got into a car crash when I was younger while I was asleep, ever ever since then I wouldn’t allow myself to fall asleep because I thought me sleeping caused us to crash -I would (still do) see the spray paint on cement and imagine if the line extended. I would have to avoid those spots or I’d feel panicked or think a bad thing was soon to come -I skip count by 2’s, 5’s, and 10’s when anxious, or something like it. -I have to hold my breath while crossing the street because I think something bad will happen if I breathe before I’m across -I have to run half way across a street before a certain light changes otherwise I’m convinced Doom is released upon me -I will randomly feel dirty in my body. Typically my hands. I will wash and wash them till the “bad” is gone. -I have the habit of over showering because I feel like when I sleep “bad” is layered all over me and showering will get it off -when making a timer for something it needs to only be “good” numbers (minutes) with a “good”number for the seconds. Ex: 11 min and 44 seconds -Numbers, Colors, Letters, and shapes all are split into feeling “good” or “bad” ex: 6 is very bad. It’s like a dirty feeling almost -I refuse to go into stores that feel “bad” or “dirty”. Like the AIR feels dirty to me, even if I know it’s clean -If I push my bedroom door shut before it closes I need to run to a carpet and stand on only my right leg or get to my stairs or I feel like something bad will happen -I will rewrite a letter or something till it feels it’s done “just right” -when walking on tiles I can’t step on lines. But also I don’t like how they’re spaced. My right foot is always stepping on one part of them and my left on another. It’s not fairly balanced. And that causes me to rewalk or step there again. And it causes me to panic and sometimes tear up. -if I only get one hand wet I need to get the other just as wet before drying them off or I can’t leave the place I’m in. -if one nail breaks on one hand ex:pointer on right, I need to cut the other one down to that length as well. Or I can’t function -when I’m sick I convince myself I’m going to die in my sleep (I’m literally sick rn and refusing to go to bed because I’m convinced my family will find me dead) -I have asthma and I sometimes think it gets so bad I’ll want to write “I love you” notes to my family because I’m going to die from not breathing in my sleep -I think I forgot something so I have to check it a few times to make sure I have it or done something -I won’t take medication unless my mother gets it for me, because I think I’ll accidentally over dose. And sometimes I’ll be worried to take it even from her (Tw for these because they’re intrusive thoughts) -I’ll be looking at my dog or a little kid and have the most vivid and violent visions of them. Ex: I will see myself bashing my dogs brain with my foot -I will have intrusive thoughts if me specializing myself to older adults, even family. Like guys. I don’t even want to give an example because it’s disgusting.. -I’ll get intrusive thoughts of me unaliving myself and writing su’cide letters to people -I will get an intrusive thought of me taking too much medication There’s still so much, but I’m sick and tired. If anyone who has OCD can let me know if it sounds like I have it please tell me. I want to figure this out. Have a good day! -Cd

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