Being afraid your dream job isn't for you

Is this normal? Does everyone experience this or if you experience it it really means that it's not for you. Or this is the same as relationship ocd? Im not in a good state these days but its okay cause im actually getting stronger now, but im really prone to have negative thoughts and any feelings that makes me question everything. I want to work with music, when im in my normal state i do know i want to work with it, but now i got feelings like maybe its not for me, and even that i dont like it now or something similar, and it scared me, it scared me cause deep down i think i want it and before i knew this is my path but now these feeling and thoughts scared me. "Does it mean its really not for me? Am i just avoiding to accept im not good for that, it's not actually for me?" I have these kind of thoughts.

PRIV8

Date posted: 1y

If its part or ocd, it really can make me feel like i dont enjoy it, i dont want it, or maybe its just cause im struggling now and thats makes me feel like i dont want it?

anonymous00001

Date posted: 1y

I have the exact same thoughts. My therapist identifies it as ocd, which makes sense because it’s the doubting disorder. You are right, it’s basically the same as rocd, which I also struggle with, even related to my family members. It can make you question the most basic things about yourself and attacks the things that are *most* important to you. If you love music, my advice would be to keep going and try to show your brain that those thoughts are not a threat to you. That you’ll follow your dreams no matter what that voice is telling you. Don’t let it take that from you. I almost did.

PRIV8

Date posted: 1y

I just feel like its wrong to label every thought and feeling as ocd, cause everyone has these feelings and when i label it as ocd i feel worse about myself. I know it shouldnt make you feel better but its like im angry at myself or dissapointed or idk... and when i choose to view it as ocd it makes you feel a little better cause then you choose you wont care about and you kinda know its ocd. But after some time this will make you feel like your just label everything as ocd when maybe something is a real problem and im afraid of that

anonymous00001

Date posted: 1y

@PRIV8 Trust me, labeling it as ocd does not make the anxiety go away. Instead, it gives me the tools to learn how to live with anxiety and fear rule my life. I’m an artist too. I recognize that it’s a choice to follow my values and choose love over fear.

PRIV8

Date posted: 1y

@Emmanonymous For me it sometimes do cause i realize many times i had this problem and nothing happened, it was ocd so now i know its ocd. But this doesnt work with new things that i didnt experienced before or when i feel like it made me feel okay so im avoiding a problem

PRIV8

Date posted: 1y

@Emmanonymous And to add to that, with many things it sounds like a real problem, like now im struggling with seeing myself ugly... idk why wherever i see myself i think im ungly but this isnt an all time thing cause normally i think i look okay, but now its stucked that i look ugly... now if you say this to someone they will say you have self esteem problem or confidence issues or whatever, but at the same time i can see that maybe it can be ocd too cause its stucked. And if it would be confidece issue than it would be permanent not that sometimes i see myself and im really happy that i look good, then something snaps and i feel like im ugly... i cant decide if its ocd or real confidence issue tho... cause if i say its ocd i feel like im reassuring myself

Disko

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 23w

Struggling in a new job healthcare

It’s been a really long time since I’ve been here. I’m about to go back to school for nursing. But right now I’m working as a nursing assistant in the hospital. Idk if it’s my body adjusting to seeing new INTENSE things every day or shoving so much information into me at once with long 12 hour shifts. And when I’m at work and conscious it’s completely fine. But when I come home and sleep I wake up from bad dreams. Yesterday at work there were maybe 10 rapids (when you call an emergency for your patient, don’t always have a good ending) and I woke up this morning remembering my dream that I was in the hospital and my heart stopped and they had to call a rapid on me. Maybe it’s not even OCD??? And it’s just heavy heavy stuff that I’ve never seen before and it’s just my brain and body adjusting to life and things that can be really scary. It just feels a bit like when my OCD was bad and I’m scared I’m really in my head right now I don’t want it to get worse. Can anyone relate???

uncertain_Aly

Date posted: 20w

Does OCD impact your ability to get to work?

Often times I find myself spiraling out in the morning about all sorts of things. When I try and catch myself and figure out what I am obsessing over it’s like it goes away. I haven’t moved. I have been sitting frozen on the floor because I can’t go to work because I am behind on work and I hate being late and I hate being messy but I am frequently late and my room is cluttered and full of stuff. I want to be good and move and go to work but I don’t know what is coming today and I hate my job so I know I will get bored and when I have nothing to keep me busy and engaged I like start thinking and taking an inventory of what is going on and then I will feel a sensation and what is the sensation? How did it happen? And I know that I will pick up the bad emotions in the office and get contaminated, I was really worried about things like this as a kid too I cried because I had to touch dirt in kindergarten. I know I am this way and I have been this way for a while but at the same time I think I might just be normal and like I don’t know why I get stuck in thinking like this. Then I begin to doubt that OCD is real because everyone has a brain with wiring and everyone gets stuck in thought sometimes. I feel disabled from whatever this is because I am stuck. I literally cannot move because I don’t know what’s wrong and I know I have to go to work even though I feel like every moment I spend there is making everything worse because other people are so stressed and I get it from them. And I don’t feel ready because I just feel off and something is wrong and I just don’t know what to do because if it’s OCD or not OCD everything anyone knows about me is coming from me and I worry that I am often masking all the thinking I’m doing because thinking all the time is rude and inconsiderate and inconvenient for those around me, but I can’t stop. I just don’t feel right, right now - and I want to know WHY?? Why is everything off all the time? How do I even know that I am not making up the experience of OCD in my head to cover up something really wrong with me and now I am taking on the symptoms of OCD like an actress, because this could be something that I can latch onto as a final hope for explaining why I am stuck. So stuck so deeply and terribly stuck sitting on my floor next to my bed just scrolling to avoid thinking because any time I start thinking I am left with no answers or help or anything just this swirly feeling. I know I am trying, maybe not my best, but as much as I possibly can. I want to be a Special Education Teacher but I have so much so so so much doubt and uncertainty about every decision I make and everything I know that I can’t get there right now. I can’t do anything right now until it feels ok and then I will. It never feels ok. I know I have to be ok not feeling ok about it. I can be unsure and still be ok. I know it’s just my thinking and my body but I just can’t get past this feeling. And then I know that because I can calm myself and be ok even though I spent 2 hours of my life today already feeling stuck and spinning around and around and around in my head - I don’t feel sure about my OCD and I think it’s a bit of a scam made up by people to cultivate pathology around deep human thought because one day I might figure it out and we all think a lot.

oneday.x

Date posted: 18w

Scared to do things.

I don't know if this is super OCD related, but it's just there are so many things I want to do in life, but I'm scared. I want to apply for this restaurant waitress job near me, but I'm worried I'd be terrible at it as I have no experience and I'm worried they wouldn't train me properly. What if someone has an allergy and I accidentally serve them the wrong food and they have a severe allergic reaction and something awful happens and then I'm sued or go to prison? It feels like there's so many things holding me back. What if I give someone a drink but a piece of my hair falls in? It just feels like I'm never going to be able to do anything. I've never tried anything, never properly stepped out of my comfort zone, never had any kind of job. So I'm so nervous to try anything in life because there are so many things that could go wrong.

Young adults with OCD

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Being afraid your dream job isn't for you

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