Terrorised by those thoughts

Im constantly being terrorised at night by thoughts like „what if I’m just gonna hurt somebody at night?“/ „what if I wanna act on my thoughts?“/ „what if my thoughts mean I actually want them and am capable of committing them?“ and like this has driven me to lock my room and store my key in Amy wardrobe and having to tape my wardrobe shut so that k can be sure I hadn’t opened my room. I don’t know what to do, does anybody have any good tips? Because it’s always that if I don’t lock them, the next day I’ll wake up being scared tk have hurt sb and that keeps feeding into my false memory obsession that I currently have :/

I Love God T...

Date posted: 1y

🥲dude last night i couldnt sleep because if harm ocd false memory, I kept seeing images of me hurting someone i love and i kept wondering what if i did this, It makes me feel like a piece of sh**. I actually love this person alot ;(

AJ Rose

Date posted: 22w

I’m having really bad thoughts of harm ocd

Im sleeping over my boys house and im having bad thoughts to hurt him and it’s like I can see myself acting on it. I never want to hurt anyone… I hope someone can comment or give me advice as I lie in bed watching crime documentary. It messes with my OCD creates false fantasies

Aphid123

Date posted: 22w

Is this even OCD?

Hey so a couple months ago (7-8) I remember being upset at my family member. Like she was talking too much while I was annoyed and remember wanting her to be quiet. I got an intrusive thought like a really bad image of doing something really bad to her, and my hand twitched to the side a little? Like it felt like I was about to?! And I remembered thinking "if I do this, I'll get in trouble". I got up and left to the bathroom and felt horrified! I was thinking "did I want to act out? Did the only reason I didn't act out was because of getting in trouble? If there was no consequences, would have I done it?! Does this mean this whole time I've been using OCD as an excuse?" I remember I couldn't sleep for 3 nights because of how bad the anxiety was, I was crying and I felt very guilty like I should turn myself in to a mental hospital. I couldn't eat for many days or be near her because of that thought and twitch I had! I'm worried it was an impulse or I actually wanted to hurt her. And even to this day I still ruminanate about this. Like last night I couldn't sleep well I kept waking up every two hours and asking myself "am I capable?" I couldn't eat last night. Sometimes I move on from it like I forget that happened but when I remember, I feel distressed about it! I don't want to be an evil person or do bad actions towards anyone! I'm even scared to be angry because of this because I'm scared I have more "chance" of acting out due to anger. Like was it an impulse and I held back? Is this even OCD? Please help, I'm really scared!

Mitu_001

Date posted: 15w

Tw I am so scared

I am so scared of everything .Of my thoughts.If I am a good person.Years ago I didnt help a kid who was in danger.Since then I started to have terrible thoughts :( i am so terrified.I still have these thoughts and I am scared it means something about me .I really dont want to hurt anyone and I want to help that kid now but idk how I can now.Also I am scared I betray everyone.I still have terrible thoughts and when I am with someone I care is worse...idk why.For example I started to talk with a collegue and he is really nice to me.I told him some things abt me( not the intrusive thoughts) and he was supportive.I have no idea if I will tell anyone abt my thoughts..and bcs of that I feel like I lie to them and betray them.I really want to enjoy my life and be happy and support people( especially because I didnt help that kid then).I want to live up to my morals now but I feel like I lie and manipulate people bcs I am a monster.Is this normal? To feel this way? What can I do? What if I am my worst fear and just cant accept it?!

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Terrorised by those thoughts

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