[Deleted]
- Date posted
- 2y
SimplerTimes SimplerTimes
- Date posted
- 2y
I had to do a double take to make sure I didn’t post this… cannot relate more. People asking how I am or treating me with human decency sets me off because I feel undeserving. After working with my therapist, I am slowly starting to enjoy things again. Like tv shows or hearing about a friend’s day. If you have not already, work with a therapist, practice ERP and remember to talk to yourself in the same way that your loved ones do. Starve out that OCD, give it nothing to work with. It’s taken so much from you and is always going to make you think you’re undeserving or unforgivable. I want to give you reassurance but it wouldn’t help, embrace the uncertainty and live your life as if you’re OCD recovered.
liliesinbloomliliesinbloom
- Date posted
- 2y
@SimplerTimes I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I’m glad to hear you’re making some progress with your therapist. I’m hoping to see a therapist sometime soon. I get that for sure. I get emotional and sometimes feel kind of irritated too when someone does something nice for me or thinks I’m good, because I feel like It’s a waste or and I don’t deserve it. Thank you so much for the advice, I appreciate it so much. It’s really hard to let go and not ruminate, or not try to explain myself and fight the bad thoughts. But you’re right, I’m giving it too much to work with by doing that. I wish you the best as well and hope you’re able to get to a place where you feel deserving of good things again.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
Ask yourself who is perfect? Who doesn't have regrets and guilt? The fact that you do have guilt means you're probably a good person. But that would be reassuring you if I said you were for sure. The truth is no one can be certain if we are good enough or have suffered enough. Only God knows. So the key to recovery is to reframe how you see the world. Live with uncertainty. Right now you're reacting to your OCD thoughts and feelings which aren't facts. But they could be, who knows. See my point? There is no way to be 100% certain. Don't react to your thoughts with judgement but instead just notice them and let them be. Then say " maybe or maybe not, " in response to your thoughts while you do something that you enjoy instead of ruminating on them further.
liliesinbloomliliesinbloom
- Date posted
- 2y
@StoicGuy You’re right. I struggle with that too, worried about how God sees me. Living with uncertainty seems scary to me, I don’t want to feel like I’m just dismissing things and getting away with anything. But yeah I guess there’s no way to be certain about it. And trying to solve everything makes it so much worse. Thank you so much for the helpful advice, I will definitely try that until I can get a therapist. I haven’t ever tried the “maybe or maybe not.” I usually just try to turn it into something else because I get scared and want it away as quickly as possible, which probably just brings it right back up. I appreciate your help so much.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@bloominglotus That's the trap of OCD because you can't solve anything that requires certainty. Also, you're not getting away with anything or dismissing anything. If you do something against your values then make changes in your life to align with your values but that doesn't require you to suffer and ruminate. I know God wouldn't want that either. He wants us to learn from mistakes and do better next time improving as people. Not to be defined by our mistakes while living in future thought state of mind therefore not growing spiritually.
liliesinbloomliliesinbloom
- Date posted
- 2y
@StoicGuy Reading this helps tremendously. Thank you so so much for talking with me.
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