- Date posted
- 1y
Rocd
How do you know if it’s relationship OCD or the truth. I’m spiraling. I’m so sad guys. I feel so weird. This sucks.
How do you know if it’s relationship OCD or the truth. I’m spiraling. I’m so sad guys. I feel so weird. This sucks.
I’m in the same boat. It’s awful. Everything is triggering and I’m irritated by everything. I just want to stay in my bed.
@ctmont Same:( my bed is the best place on earth right now I hate to say it but I just wanna stay there and be depressed. I don’t wanna do anything. This is a nightmare that you can’t wake up from
@ctmont I feel numb, I don’t feel myself anymore and I feel bugged out. I feel nothing, I talk normally how I would usually with him but there’s no sense of feeling behind it. It makes me feel like I’m leading him on but I’m not. Idk what to do
@aleigha SAME!
@____Anonymous_____ Literally! I wish I could just wake up from this.
@aleigha It makes me scared for my whole life. Wondering if it’s the truth or ocd. I tell myself I’ve been with him for so long if it was actually the truth wouldn’t I not care? Ugh.
@____Anonymous_____ Been with my husband for 12 years and we have two kids. I’m sick to my stomach about this. I’ll have a few “good” days and then my brain throws me into the pit again. “Look how many years have gone by. Do you want to be old and full of regret?” It’s so twisted and I hate it.
@____Anonymous_____ I feel you :(
@ctmont I have one kid with my boyfriend and the thought in my head is is it the truth and I’m too scared to tell him or is it just OCD?
@ctmont How can you lose feelings instantly? Is that even possible? I don’t think it is that’s what makes me think it’s OCD because I was fine a week ago.
@ctmont We broke up for a while, and we’re even in different relationships. I never felt this way in any other relationship but that’s because I didn’t care too much about all of my other relationships lol but when we first got back together, I had the worst ROCD everand it went away for years until now and it’s back so that’s what also gets me scared because why is it just now coming back it’s almost been three years
@____Anonymous_____ Yep. Same thing here. Like I’ve been lying to myself and that the feelings have been here all along. 😭
@____Anonymous_____ Not sure this helps. My ocd first flared up when I was 26. Was around 4-5 months into a new gf. Absolutely loving life. As confident as I’d ever been in myself. Then over night it was like a thought popped in my head “you don’t feel anything for her”. It ran away hard. My whole existence turned into figuring out how that could happen when I didn’t want it to happen. Almost like I wasn’t allowed what I wanted … It’s since changed themes to SOOCD, but the complete sudden loss of feelings really hit home.
@ctmont Same here
@gp absolutely same thing, everything happened overnight… it’s like I wrote each word… so scary and so hard
I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It can be incredibly distressing to experience doubt and uncertainty in a relationship. It's important to remember that feelings of doubt and anxiety are common in relationship OCD (ROCD). Here are some key points to consider: Professional Evaluation: If you're unsure whether your thoughts and concerns are related to ROCD or a genuine issue, it's a good idea to seek the guidance of a mental health professional, such as a therapist or counselor. They can help you assess your thoughts and feelings in the context of your relationship. Everybody here at NOCD is trained to treat OCD and use ERP. If you have fears about doing therapy and engaging in ERP, let me put some doubts to rest. ERP is 80% effective. Alot of individuals that seek this treatment are able to minimize the symptoms and live comfortable lives with OCD. A few other things to consider. Pattern Recognition: ROCD often involves repetitive, intrusive thoughts about your relationship and partner. If you find that your doubts and anxieties follow a pattern and are not based on concrete evidence of problems in the relationship, it could be a sign of ROCD. Self-Reflection: Take some time to reflect on your feelings. Are these doubts based on genuine concerns or are they fueled by irrational fears and anxieties? ROCD tends to create doubt where there may not be a real issue. Hope this information helps! Have a wonderful evening.
@Justin Trout Thank you I really appreciate your guidance. My thing is I was very very depressed when my rocd relapsed which was a week ago and now I kinda of pulled myself out of that depression but the thoughts are still there. Which makes me feel like it’s the truth and not ocd. It concerns me because I look for answers throughout my whole day. One second I’m reassuring myself it’s ocd the next I’m telling myself what if it’s the truth. It consumes my day.
@____Anonymous_____ hello!! one thing that has helped me is looking towards my actions rather than my thoughts. even when my thoughts are saying what if this is true?!? i just focus on the fact that i am staying in this relationship regardless because i want to. idk if this unproductive, but its been a way for me to tolerate uncertainty in that the thoughts can stay there but i am going to live and take my next steps according to my values and not my thoughts. since i value my relationship, im going to stick to it. i hope this helps :’) you got this!
@Dani.c I do the same. Regardless of what my brain is telling me I keep telling myself well you know you won’t break up with him
The entire comment section is my tribe 😅You aren’t alone.
I understand you bro, we are all in the same boat
I think it depends on the circumstance but if you are consumed with what ifs and fear then I would say it’s likely ROCD. Just remember this is a non professional opinion
Oh man! This is me…struggling with it big time…do those of you struggling with ROCD tell your partners about ROCD or is that unproductive & hurtful? Help!
I just saw my boyfriend, and even though everything was okay on the outside, inside my mind it was a storm. I kept having thoughts like: “You don’t like him.” “You’re not feeling anything.” “You’re pretending.” “You don’t care.” And then, he said something sweet — something that should’ve made me feel happy: “We should marry.” And instead of warmth, I felt anxiety. A pit in my stomach. A voice in my head saying: “You don’t want that.” “You’ll never stay with him.” “If you really loved him, you’d feel joy.” And I hate it. I hate that I’m in this state. I don’t feel connected. I don’t feel clarity. I don’t even know what I feel anymore. I just feel… numb. And the worst part? It feels like I don’t even care. But I know I do. Somewhere, beneath all the noise and panic and obsessive thoughts, I care. I want to feel close to him. I want to stop second-guessing every word, every touch, every thought. This is ROCD. It makes me question everything. It makes me feel like I’m lying — even when I’m not. It steals the moments that should feel warm and turns them into confusion. If anyone else feels this awful mix of numbness, fear, and guilt — please tell me I’m not alone.
Im scared that if I start to think it too much, I will start to believe it, and it becomes my reality. I always have thoughts like, “Do I love him, what if I lose feelings, how longs is this going to last, when will these thoughts finally go away, is he the one for me, is this how love feels like or am I just convincing myself?” I start to search things up to make myself feel better but the longest that works for is a few hours and then that gut wrenching feeling comes back. I love him I’m sure of it, but then why do I feel like this? I know if I didn’t love someone I would let them go and would t even fight for it or try to get better, but for him I’m trying ever second of everyday and sometimes I just feel so hopeless. I can’t afford a therapist and I’m too busy to talk to one. I don’t know what to do or how to feel, sometimes I just feel numb and I hate it, sometimes I feel like crying but can’t, and most the time I don’t feel jealous anymore and that scares me because I’m a jealous person. Then I get thoughts and reminders of my ex. Not in a way that I like them but the hatred and the trauma and pain they left me with. The mental, verbal and physical abuse. Sometimes my current relationship reminds me of him and why I shouldn’t be in one because I always fall into this deep hole that feels impossible to get out of. I just get so scared.
hi! I broke a short period of doing well without compulsions because I got triggered again. Before this, I had about two calmer days where I didn’t spiral so much, but now everything feels worse. I’m scared that I don’t love my boyfriend as much as I used to, or that this relationship is making me feel stuck or sad. He’s a wonderful person, and I hate thinking this way. I smelled a perfume that used to make me feel calm and in love, and now it just makes me question everything. I spent hours last night searching Reddit, especially on r/ROCD, trying to see if someone is like me or if anyone has answers. I keep rereading posts, hoping I’ll feel certain about what I should do. But I just feel more confused. I keep thinking, “What if I heal and then realize I don’t love him?” or “What if I’m only staying because I feel safe with him or I’m used to him?” I feel numb sometimes, or like I’m pretending, and I hate it. I want to feel love and clarity again. I don’t know what’s real or what’s ROCD anymore. I just feel lost and afraid. I talk to hi. now and i feel so strange like i dont want to force myself i want to like him i dont understand what i feel i feel so weird in my chest
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond