It’s near the tenth anniversary of when I saw my dad die, I can’t get the intrusive thoughts out of my head of him dying. Before today I was awake for 48 hours straight. God I just feel so exhausted.
I had the exact same intrusive thought about my dad too, I know exactly how you feel and man is it awful. Today that Intrusive thought no longer bothers me and hardly even pops up in my head now. Your dad was obviously someone significant to you! I used to also remind myself of the times my dad was happy and imagine that as well, but definitely easier said than done. Emdr has also helped me in the past with things related to trauma, maybe that is something to consider? I wish you the absolute best!
@Jennaffuur I’m glad you’ve been able to get to that point. Again I’m still new to this so hopefully as I work more towards my mental health goals I’ll be able to be more stable.
Have you looked into trauma therapy? You might very much benefit from it since that can be considered very traumatic and OCD plays off that.
@Nica I’d definitely be open to it. I just had my first session today so I’ll bring that up during my next one next week.
You are so loved by him. You are loved by all of us.
Hey, I’m so sorry your going through this. OCD is so unfair and it’s debilitating on its own I can’t imagine it being mixed with what you have lived through. I recommend you give magnesium a try. I have been taking it for 5 days now and my ocd thoughts have decreased drastically. I discovered giving magnesium a try off of a forum of women who had heightened intrusive thoughts with their cycles. Do some research on it but it wouldn’t hurt to take. Also really recommend getting trauma therapy. Maybe one that works with ocd as well. Life is so difficult and I really hope this helps and that things get better soon ❤️🩹
@ Skyline 🕊️ Thanks for your kind words, yeah I’m gonna bring up trauma therapy in my next session because my therapist said I might also have PTSD. And I’ll give magnesium a try thanks 🙏 hope you’re having a good day
I have barely slept in three days, maybe two hours a night. I feel so overwhelmed and uncomfortable right now. I cannot, for the life of me, stop confessing. I feel absolutely unforgivable, like no matter what it is, I am irredeemable. These waves of guilt and dread keep hitting me so hard. Every time I sleep, all I do is dream-ruminate. I analyze every tiny detail of whatever I am obsessing over, even in my sleep. It almost feels easier to stay awake, not that I have been able to do anything else. I feel so drained. I am scared to sleep. I hate my brain. I feel so anxious.
I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.
Any one else deal with this? Like from the moment they wake up to the second they fall asleep, the intrusive thoughts are there?
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