Nia
- Date posted
- 6y
UltimatelyumiUltimatelyumi
- Date posted
- 6y
I understand this, a lot. I have been through this before and I used to be TERRIFIED of being abusive. Try and let yourself press the button. Don’t even let yourself check if you’re manipulative, just... press it! “ur being manipulative ahahahha” Is what your OCD might say. But you know what? FUDGE IT. say what you want to say!!! Maybe you are being manipulative, maybe you’re not. Who knows? It’s okay to be uncertain. Keep doing what YOU want to do, don’t let your OCD keep you away from your values!! Sending love to you!!! ?❤️
UltimatelyumiUltimatelyumi
- Date posted
- 6y
@Svaupe Don’t you think that saying that to the other person is a compulsion? Since it relieves you of the idea that they might think you’re manipulative, so you tell them yourself that you’re not being manipulative.
SvaupeSvaupe
- Date posted
- 6y
I often feel this way too! One thing I’ve started doing recently is to explicitly express this concern to the person I’m talking to or texting with. For instance, I was texting someone about something sensitive recently and was afraid I might come across as manipulative so I just honestly mentioned something along the lines of “I promise I’m not trying to be manipulative, I genuinely —“. That made me feel much better, and the other person understood this and responded positively. While you can’t always control what others might think, I find that being honest about these concerns helps you keep your conscience clear and also let’s the other person know that you don’t intend to manipulate them in any way.
harriet221harriet221
- Date posted
- 6y
@svaupe I completely understand why you do that as I do things to relieve myself to but apologizing for it, kinda buys into the idea that you are that. At that moment it’s just a mere thought, by mentioning it you kind of are making it real. I suggest trying not to and see how it goes :)
SvaupeSvaupe
- Date posted
- 6y
@Ultimatelyumi - Yes, I think you’re right, I’m so sorry! Thanks for pointing that out, gives me something to contemplate about as well.
Related posts
aaanonymous
- Date posted
- 25w
is this manipulation?
I have a very persistent confession compulsion. most of the time i confess to my lover, mostly because i have obsessions about our relationship and stuff ( im always terrified I'm treating my lover badly). at times when I confess bc im scared i did something wrong i also tell my lover what my therapist or a friend of ours told me ( usually that i actually didn't do anything wrong and that i should calm down). i think i tell them because im deeply scared in those moments and maybe i do It because im afraid that what im confessing sounds extremely bad and i want to make myself look less of a monster? idk. i don't think i do this to make my lover reply a certain way, like ofc i want them to tell me that everything's fine and i didn't do anything wrong, but i genuinely want to know the truth and if they feel okay or not. i don't care about lies and i think the proof that i genuinely want to know what my lover feels is that even when they reassure me i cant stop thinking about it and wondering if what they tell me is true and i ask them many many times. i also always tell them that if they feel uncomfortable or hurt they can tell me or that they can straight up break up with me. idk if it's manipulation that i say those things because im scared and in some way maybe i want to justify myself
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 22w
Thoughts of what if I was to text someone something horrible
Hey so lately I've been thinking along the line of the theme of ocd of 'what if I was to shout something inappropriate out" only this is what if I was to text someone something inappropriate please help me somebody it's causing me to panic.
aeristifa
- Date posted
- 20w
anybody else
any of y’all feel like every single thing you say is some sort of manipulation. like you’re not genuine at all and everything you do is to get something out of something? the same with therapists too. i feel like ever since i was a kid i’ve manipulated my therapists in some way, like to look like the victim or so they’d think about me a certain way. like therapy could never help me cause i can’t tell when i’m lying or manipulating or whatever. i’ve seen someone mention something similar on here and just wanted to see what y’all thought!
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond