- Username
- Nia
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I understand this, a lot. I have been through this before and I used to be TERRIFIED of being abusive. Try and let yourself press the button. Don’t even let yourself check if you’re manipulative, just... press it! “ur being manipulative ahahahha” Is what your OCD might say. But you know what? FUDGE IT. say what you want to say!!! Maybe you are being manipulative, maybe you’re not. Who knows? It’s okay to be uncertain. Keep doing what YOU want to do, don’t let your OCD keep you away from your values!! Sending love to you!!! ?❤️
@Svaupe Don’t you think that saying that to the other person is a compulsion? Since it relieves you of the idea that they might think you’re manipulative, so you tell them yourself that you’re not being manipulative.
I often feel this way too! One thing I’ve started doing recently is to explicitly express this concern to the person I’m talking to or texting with. For instance, I was texting someone about something sensitive recently and was afraid I might come across as manipulative so I just honestly mentioned something along the lines of “I promise I’m not trying to be manipulative, I genuinely —“. That made me feel much better, and the other person understood this and responded positively. While you can’t always control what others might think, I find that being honest about these concerns helps you keep your conscience clear and also let’s the other person know that you don’t intend to manipulate them in any way.
@svaupe I completely understand why you do that as I do things to relieve myself to but apologizing for it, kinda buys into the idea that you are that. At that moment it’s just a mere thought, by mentioning it you kind of are making it real. I suggest trying not to and see how it goes :)
@Ultimatelyumi - Yes, I think you’re right, I’m so sorry! Thanks for pointing that out, gives me something to contemplate about as well.
Is anyone else obsessed with being percieved as "good" ? I get super anxious thinking people think badly of me and always try to make people have a good image of me but then i obsess over if im manipulating them to think that im good and im lying and are not really a nice person. Anyone ?
growing up I always really liked being nice to people and doing things for them without reason in a helpful way. It made me feel good about myself. But I’m 21 now and learned through an Instagram article that being too nice is bad and manipulative. It’s been a long time since seeing that and now I’m worried all my kindness is to get people to do things for me in return when it isn’t. I really feel like most of my purpose is to be good (I’m not religious btw) I just want to do things that make people feel good and happy and I also just feel compelled to be the best I can be and do whatever I feel is correct and good
im scared that im a psyhopath and that im just pretending to be a nice person and i that i dont have empathy im so scared omg
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