So at this stage in my OCD it actually feels like all of the physical compulsions I do drive the intrusive thought rather than the other way around. Does anyone have any advice other than erp on how I can start stopping these compulsions? I have to admit that I'm beginning to become really afraid now that this is how the rest of my life is going to be because I just can't seem to stop them and its been over 4 years
Increase the length of time before you do the compulsion. Say you get triggered and have the urge to do the compulsion immediately, wait 10 seconds instead. Then the next time increase it to 20 seconds, then 30 etc. It will allow you to sit with the uncomfortable feeling rather than avoid it, which makes it worse.
Thanks for your advice although it looks like I could be stuck with ocd as my whole day is spent doing some sort of physical compulsion. For example I can't even put my clothes on on the morning without half taking them off and putting them back on again and then so on am so forth with everythimg thar I try to do. The longest I have probably managed without doing a compulsion in the past 4 years is about 5 mins and everytime my anxiety is so high from it that I can't bare it and I go straight back to compulsions and the cycle continues. I would say that I have a constant intrusive thought and feeling the whole time rather than random intrusive thoughts. My constsnt thoughts are 'that if I don't do compulsions that I'm going to die or that someone I love is going to die' 'im a bad person and I dont deserve anything good' and that 'we are all going to die one day and have no idea why or when so whats the point anyway' I'm sorry of this sounds really dark and negative because I am actually a friendly guy who used to be so positive. I just don't know how I stand a chance of beating ocd until I can either stop these thoughts or become really comfortable with them. I tried erp and unfortunately it just didn't seem to help me
I replied to you in your other post which might be helpful
Thanks nica I just read your reply. The big problem that I have is exactly as I have replied to studybug above. My intrusive thoughts are very dark and are with me from the second I wake up until the second I go to sleep and therefore I feel a constant need to do physical compulsions as I feel like that keeps me safe. I appreciate that all types of ocd must be horrible but I can honestly say that I wouldn't wish how I feel on my worst enemy
@Joe87 I’ve had basically all the subtypes that you can think of, and you still treat them the same. You have to realize and accept that the more you give them attention, no matter how small, the worse your OCD will get. That’s why you need to let them be present without fighting or judging them. They’ve gotten so bad because you’ve reacted to them every time OCD pops up. You need to let it be for your brain to realize the thoughts, images, and feelings are NOT a threat, and then they dwindle.
@Nica Sorry for the delayed reply. Yes I get what you're saying. It's actually really strange because I feel like I have always been a very deep over thinker but only if I allow myself the time to be and I have always had anxiety but when i was in my 20s i was such a busy person with work and a strict regimented exercise routine. I actually never really had much time to overthink or feel anxious about things. It was as if I was so busy on most days that I would always burn off my anxious and nervous energy and my self asteem and self pride levels where very high. It wasn't until I hit the pause button 4 years ago to get some counselling that I felt the floodgates of anxiety open up and manifest into ocd and the maim reason that I went to counselling was to try and work out why in my 30s was I still occasionally binge drinking on the rare occasions that I drank alcohol and if there was an unresolved issue somewhere for that. Just to add I would only tend to drink once every 2 months and yes whilst I would get very drunk I was performimg well in all of the other areas in my life. I went to counselling because my mother encouraged me to but I'm honestly beginning to believe that agreeing to counselling when I didn't feel like I needed it triggered a perfextionism reponse in me which as we all know is terrible for our metal health
Ocd wraps itself around what matters most to you. So figure out what in life matters most to you and then try to understand that you are performing these compulsions because the thing that matters most to you is out of sync. Youre trying to get it back in sync. Let it be out of sync the rest of your life.
So are you saying that I need to learn to allow the things that bother me to just be there and accept that I now feel differently about them but thats okay
(Long post warning) Hi, I’ve been struggling with severe OCD for six years now. it started in 2019 with my theme being getting sick/emetophobia. it devastated my life. I almost didn’t graduate high school from it. I remember washing my hands for three hours one day until they were nearly bloody while crying and asking why I could not stop doing it. I remember id have to write and rewrite sentences when I did my English homework and that’s why I nearly failed that class. I remember how I would spend up to thirty minutes to an hour pacing the halls of my apartment while my mom was asleep until I neutralized the thoughts about throwing up and I could finally go to bed. I don’t know when it happened, but my theme switched. Sometimes in late 2020 or early 2021, it switched to POCD. It started with a single thought, and I focused on it and it’s been my theme since then for four years. It has been absolutely destroying me. I feel so disgusted and lost and just tired. My compulsions are severe now. I thought they were bad before, but now they’re ten times worse. I can’t eat, drink, change my clothes, walk, or even do things on my phone normally. I’ve developed so many mental compulsions that it’s so intricate and complicated yet at the same time I’ve done them so much that they’ve become normal. An example I have is if im putting on a shirt and I have a “bad” thought, I have to take it off and put it back on two more times (that’ll make it 3 times I put the shirt back on - odd numbers are my safe number). I have to have a good thought on the third time otherwise I have to take it off and put it on two more times to make it five times I put on that shirt. If not that then I just put on a different shirt because the original is now tainted with my bad thought. I can’t open apps on my phone. It’s with the numbers again. If I open TikTok once while having a bad thought - I have to close it and open it two more times and so on. Sometimes I do it up to 30 times. So I just don’t do things usually. I don’t turn on the TV because I know I’ll redo it. I don’t open a book or grab it off my shelf because I’ll have to repeat the action. I can’t even lay in bed without getting up and redoing it even if im exhausted. I just feel so helpless. I don’t know what to do. I feel disgusting and even now my minds screaming at me that I am dirty and what I think is true. I just wish I was free of this, I wish I could just live my life. I’ve wasted hours and days because of my compulsions. I mask it so well around my friends. I don’t do them in front of anyone or I’ve learned to hide it well. But when im back home alone, it goes haywire. I just want to live again.
It has to be the most frustrating thing in the world. My OCD is mainly about doing physical compulsions in order to make sure that nothing bad happens to myself or my loved ones The really annoying thing is that by doing these compusions a bad thing is already happening because it absolutely dominates my life and stops me from living properly I've tried ERP and it didn't help
I still do not have an OFFICIAL diagnosis (I dont have the means to do so) but given my symptoms, past and present in my life hugely suggest OCD is what I am dealing with. I cannot be 100 percent certain but after searching for answers and researching for a long time now, I am fairly certain and confident this is what I am struggling with. Given this step forward, I am making more effort into giving up compulsions. at the current moment I believe to be dealing with ROCD, as I have been having several intrusive thoughts that conflict with my relationship. For starters, recently over the past month or 2, I have been struggling with intrusive thoughts like not being over my ex, being attracted to someone else, losing feelings for my partner and not being in love, etc. I can consciously identify that I dont believe these thoughts to be true but it causes me so much distress and anxiety. It gets extremely unbearable some days, and I have leaned into 2 main compulsions. I have relied on thought checking and googling as my source of relief. At first the googling was genuinely to start finding answers; hence why I have made some of the discoveries I have about OCD including this site. But it developed into every time I was anxious, I would whip my phone out and start googling strictly to find an answer that would reassure me or calm me down. As for thought checking, it acted as a way to reaffirm my love for my girlfriend in my head when I have had the thoughts that collide with my relationship and how I feel about my girlfriend. It worked at first but developed into a compulsion where every time a bad thought got me worked up id either do my normal googling or Id think about that in my head to calm myself down. Over time these compulsions have gotten less and less affective and now when I do them it only gets me more anxious and desperate for reassurance (strengthening the cycle or whatever it is lol). I did some more research and finally have accepted the very real fact that I am going to have to sit in heavy anxiety and not give into compulsions for a while in order to treat this. I have to sit in the thoughts that make me feel all this hightened anxiety and distress without giving into compulsion. to be honest I am scared, the thoughts are more rampant than ever, but I am ready to commit to this. I dont think I am gonna be able to go cold turkey on my compulsions so I am ready for the reality I might relapse on the compulsions sometimes, But am gonna keep going until I can break these shackles OCD has on my life right now. I wanna ask, what is everyones methods they use to avoid giving into compulsion when the thoughts get loud? any advice is welcome :)
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