So at this stage in my OCD it actually feels like all of the physical compulsions I do drive the intrusive thought rather than the other way around. Does anyone have any advice other than erp on how I can start stopping these compulsions? I have to admit that I'm beginning to become really afraid now that this is how the rest of my life is going to be because I just can't seem to stop them and its been over 4 years
Increase the length of time before you do the compulsion. Say you get triggered and have the urge to do the compulsion immediately, wait 10 seconds instead. Then the next time increase it to 20 seconds, then 30 etc. It will allow you to sit with the uncomfortable feeling rather than avoid it, which makes it worse.
Thanks for your advice although it looks like I could be stuck with ocd as my whole day is spent doing some sort of physical compulsion. For example I can't even put my clothes on on the morning without half taking them off and putting them back on again and then so on am so forth with everythimg thar I try to do. The longest I have probably managed without doing a compulsion in the past 4 years is about 5 mins and everytime my anxiety is so high from it that I can't bare it and I go straight back to compulsions and the cycle continues. I would say that I have a constant intrusive thought and feeling the whole time rather than random intrusive thoughts. My constsnt thoughts are 'that if I don't do compulsions that I'm going to die or that someone I love is going to die' 'im a bad person and I dont deserve anything good' and that 'we are all going to die one day and have no idea why or when so whats the point anyway' I'm sorry of this sounds really dark and negative because I am actually a friendly guy who used to be so positive. I just don't know how I stand a chance of beating ocd until I can either stop these thoughts or become really comfortable with them. I tried erp and unfortunately it just didn't seem to help me
I replied to you in your other post which might be helpful
Thanks nica I just read your reply. The big problem that I have is exactly as I have replied to studybug above. My intrusive thoughts are very dark and are with me from the second I wake up until the second I go to sleep and therefore I feel a constant need to do physical compulsions as I feel like that keeps me safe. I appreciate that all types of ocd must be horrible but I can honestly say that I wouldn't wish how I feel on my worst enemy
@Joe87 I’ve had basically all the subtypes that you can think of, and you still treat them the same. You have to realize and accept that the more you give them attention, no matter how small, the worse your OCD will get. That’s why you need to let them be present without fighting or judging them. They’ve gotten so bad because you’ve reacted to them every time OCD pops up. You need to let it be for your brain to realize the thoughts, images, and feelings are NOT a threat, and then they dwindle.
@Nica Sorry for the delayed reply. Yes I get what you're saying. It's actually really strange because I feel like I have always been a very deep over thinker but only if I allow myself the time to be and I have always had anxiety but when i was in my 20s i was such a busy person with work and a strict regimented exercise routine. I actually never really had much time to overthink or feel anxious about things. It was as if I was so busy on most days that I would always burn off my anxious and nervous energy and my self asteem and self pride levels where very high. It wasn't until I hit the pause button 4 years ago to get some counselling that I felt the floodgates of anxiety open up and manifest into ocd and the maim reason that I went to counselling was to try and work out why in my 30s was I still occasionally binge drinking on the rare occasions that I drank alcohol and if there was an unresolved issue somewhere for that. Just to add I would only tend to drink once every 2 months and yes whilst I would get very drunk I was performimg well in all of the other areas in my life. I went to counselling because my mother encouraged me to but I'm honestly beginning to believe that agreeing to counselling when I didn't feel like I needed it triggered a perfextionism reponse in me which as we all know is terrible for our metal health
Ocd wraps itself around what matters most to you. So figure out what in life matters most to you and then try to understand that you are performing these compulsions because the thing that matters most to you is out of sync. Youre trying to get it back in sync. Let it be out of sync the rest of your life.
So are you saying that I need to learn to allow the things that bother me to just be there and accept that I now feel differently about them but thats okay
Hi! I've been on my OCD healing journey for about half a year and I have seen a lot of success. I'm reaching out for advice, I am very willing to do exposures because I know the more I do them, the more I get better, but I struggle with the response prevention part. I don't know how to control my brain when it comes to facing the fears especially since most of my compulsions are mental. I can tell myself the typical things "I am okay with the uncertainty of this happening", etc. but its like my brain doesn't believe them. I've been stuck in this disconnect for a while and would love advice you have heard from a therapist or learned that has really help you.
I have just recently realized that I had SO OCD. This began whenever I was watching porn and had an intrusive thought about the guy in the porn. It was more minor at first, it was a majority of what I was thinking about throughout the day but it didn’t feel as distressing at first. If I had downtime to think about it, it would affect me but if I was just going about my day I wouldn’t notice it. I began going through the compulsions of checking myself. This lasted for a while until another obsession occurred. Then it seemed as if my SO OCD took a step back. I would have flare ups but they would seem to pass. Recently, I had a very bad night of constant compulsions and looking at pictures and imagining things to check myself. After that night it was very distressing, it affected me to the point where people around me began to notice and ask me if I was okay. One of the big reasons I was so upset was my girlfriend, we have been together for over 3 years and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I was thinking “Oh my god, if I am gay I can never be with her.” I would sit and cry about it thinking I would lose her and that might life would change because I was gay. I finally had enough and talked to her and my parents. We did some research and I was so shocked to find out that I had a form of OCD, it was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders just knowing that other people have been where I am and that I’m not gay. However, I may have naively expected the compulsions and obsessive thoughts to go away now that I knew I had an actual problem. But I found that the compulsions and thoughts were still there and I was going to put some effort into getting better. I have researched and now know what to do when experiencing intrusive thoughts, yet I still have been performing the compulsions which is just feeding into the OCD. I find myself having intrusive thoughts and then start performing compulsions to see if they are true. What really bothers me is when I have an intrusive thought that tells me that I do like something. But when I think about it I have no desire to pursue those thoughts. However when I feed into the compulsions they just seem to feed into each other. It is like my OCD ignores all the things that I know I like and goes straight to panic mode. I am also trying to do ERP and am going to start doing my best to get better. Does anyone have any tips for not performing the compulsions no matter how anxious you are feeling and no matter how real the intrusive thoughts seem to feel?
After almost 2 decades of struggling with Pure OCD that was all-consuming, all day, every day, I'm finally in a spot where I can effectively manage this disorder. A big way I did this was realizing that compulsions NEVER help and they are NEVER the answer. It might feel like it's helping in the moment, but you're just giving power to the OCD and it WILL come back stronger. Sometimes (especially with Pure O), it can be hard to even tell if you're doing a compulsion. If you're not sure and think there is even a possibility that it could be, try to stop doing that immediately. The better you get at noticing your compulsions and stopping them quickly the better off you'll be in the long-term. It's definitely a tough and bumpy road, but if I was able to get there I'm sure anyone can. Just stick with it and it gets way easier.
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