- Username
- kkkk123
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Me. I’m a girl and I’ve been going through everything in my life. For example: ‘Why didn’t I like shopping when I was a young teen?’ (Very stereotypical I know but still) ‘Why didn’t I get into makeup until a bit later than my friends?’ ‘Has my discomfort with my body really been because of low self esteem or because I’m secretly transgender?’ My face seems soooooo manly every single time I look in the mirror I see a boy. I feel completely different and I hate it.
I relate to this but obvs I’m a man so it’s the other way round. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety when I was lonely, which then led on to obsessive thinking (which I’ve had my whole life) and I was searching for a way out because I was so miserable at the time, and my brain suddenly (at the age of 20) was like maybe the missing piece is that you’re trans, maybe that’s what’s wrong’ I even went to a gender therapist who told me I wasn’t, told people what I was experiencing and at first they were like oh maybe you are, and now as I keep them updated on my journey they’re very like ‘hmm we think it’s an obsession otherwise you would have just transitioned’ I never want to change my body or identity. But you know what, it’s literally down to whether or not you want to change your body. I know I don’t, I like my body, and you know you don’t, so it’s just that. It’s getting the thoughts under control. I believe we have this for a reason, for us to become stronger individuals. Try not to look into the past, it’s meaningless. You’re gonna come out of this so strong
Have you gone through ERP or are looking into it? I’ve had anxiety for years, I suspect since I was about 10. I’ve thought I’ve had SO-OCD since I was 15 but I have no idea and it’s been on my mind every day for 5 years (I’m 20). I’ve been massively depressed and sometimes suicidal since. I get obsessive m thoughts about being trans on and off and I’ve been experiencing it again recently and it’s really horrible. But I really hope I come out of this more sure of who I am than ever before. I came home today and looked in the mirror and I felt okay again. I felt pretty and comfortable (sound so stupid hahaha) and I cried because I know these moments where I’m nice and calm are the real me but they’re so short. We will be stronger, hope you’re doing well!
I’m trying to find resources for doing ERP by myself, been meditating heavily for the past 6 months which has changed my life. I’m sorry you’ve had to go through all that, but it’s a part of you if that makes sense, and you is clearly a brilliant, sensitive person. You’re you, whoever that is.
My brother does.
You mean he’s trans and doesn’t have OCD? Just confused because I saw your comments on another post about your trans brother?
No, he Trans and has OCD. Sorry.
I've had every ocd there is, even transgender ocd. I thought to myself, maybe I want to be a guy, cause I thought I was a lesbian and thought being a man would be easier. But I'm really really feminine ? I also worried people would think I'm a hermaphrodite, has anyone else had this? I worry that some people think I'm a man secretely, and again I'm a really feminine woman. I don't wear thrilly dresses but I wear makeup and tight fitting clothes. I like perfume. I'm not even remotely the opposite sex ?
I'm really really scared that I might be transgender I don't know if it's ocd or denial can anyone please help
Does anyone here experience transgender OCD? It’s been my main theme for 2 years and with that I get HOCD (worrying that I’m a gay man). I identify as a bisexual woman and these thoughts have been so distressing to me. They feel so real. I’d really love to connect with people who are going through this.
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