I’m looking for my harm/suicidal ocd people here to shed some light and hope. I’m not asking for reassurance (I know we can’t do that with OCD) but just people who can share their experiences and what has worked for them in dealing with and overcoming this awful theme. Thanks in advance.
I have pretty bad harm ocd and I’ve had it for going on 6 years. I will say within those 6 years I have had several months of happiness here and there where I feel close to normal and I’m not ruminating much and the thighs aren’t as prevalent. I had like a period of almost a year where I felt really good. Unfortunately ocd can be such a high and low disorder where you feel better and then it comes back.one of the things that helps me get out of a deep cycle is saying to myself that I’ve done it before and I’ve felt that doom and hopelessness in the past where I felt like nothing would ever be ok again, but I’ve gotten better even after feeling hopeless I don’t really struggle with suicide ocd but I have had episodes of it where I’m scared to be alone and scared I’ll kill my self and things like that. I guess that theme just doesn’t stick to me as much as harm and going insane does. Remember our disorder attacks what you value and love most. Typically ppl who struggle badly with suicide ocd have no desire to die and want to live their life and can’t imagine what them killing themselves would do to their family. You just have to separate yourself from the thoughts and feelings and urges. And Trust me I know it feels impossible. I’m struggling bad myself right now with this. But we have got to listen to the ocd professionals
@taylor1234 Thank you so much for this. I’ve had this theme for a while and it’s very distressing. I’m doing ERP now and just doing the exposures alone sets me off into anxiety. I’m trying to stop the rumination part of it. I do have days where I feel great and like I can take on the world. Then there’s other days where it comes on very intensely and very convincing that I’ll act on the thoughts. I have small children who I worship to the ends of the earth and I feel immense guilt around them thinking “they won’t have a mom anymore”. I just wanted a little bit of hope that it gets better.
@Santo123# I have a two-year-old son, myself and guilt and distress and feeling like a failure and a bad parent is all of the emotions that comes with having these thoughts. These thoughts are not us and we have to learn to separate. It is just so damn hard.
@taylor1234 You’re right and it really is ! Stay strong girl !
I'm 24 years old and I've struggled with this since I was about 17 I can relate with Taylor where I had months of feeling okay or normal just to have harm OCD come back with a vengeance I was a self harmer from the age of 12-17 so I've got a lot of scars on my arms I also attempted suicide more than once while I struggled with depression but one thing I can say is things get better they have to the ruminating and constant fear that come from intense urges is a sign we're at our lowest and life is like a bow and arrow when you get pulled back and feel like your regressing it's because you're going to get launched forward and into better things
@Gene Ross I’m sorry you went through that. I’m glad you’re doing better ! Are you sure that’s OCD though? From my understanding OCD is ego dystonic meaning they go against what you really want to do. I’ve never heard of someone actually acting on the thoughts, only feeling the urge to. I’m just wondering sorry
All I can say is we're in this together and I look forward to experiencing the highs and the lows with all of you and will always be here if need be if you need to talk
Rest assured I may hate how I feel some days but I love living❤️
The suicidal thoughts and tendencies happened way before I ever had any type of OCD I had been diagnosed with Chronic Depression at the age of 12 and didn't experience any sort of harm OCD until I was about 17
@Gene Ross I’m happy you’re here keep going strong
Hi. Does anyone out there have Suicide OCD? If so, I’d love to chat. It’s a new theme for me and extremely scary. Just would like to talk to someone who is experienced with it. Thanks!
Hey guys. I’ve been dealing with Harm OCD for around 3 and 1/2 months now, and it’s been extremely difficult to experience. I’ve had OCD my whole life and some of my family members do as well, one of my cousins actually has the same main subtype as me, but he was diagnosed almost a year ago when I didn’t have it myself. I’ve been going to an OCD & Anxiety Treatment Center the past week and I’m really struggling with the exposures we do there, as well as the ones we do at home. I constantly feel like I’m judging myself and I genuinely feel worthless, like I’m a horrible person to have unwanted intrusive thoughts like these. I feel like it’s so difficult to stay mindful and to not judge any of the thoughts that surface. Those with Harm OCD, have any of you here gone from debilitating OCD to living fulfilling lives? If so, what was the process like for you, if you’d like to share? Thanks and I hope you’re all doing well, or are continuing to improve.
Anyone else feel like their worst ocd theme is harm? I have several themes but I’d rather experience any of mine than my harm ocd. When I get anxious over my harm ocd, I’m miserable but when I don’t get anxious, my ocd latches on to “oh so you like this? Could you do this? Do you want to?” Ugh. I just hope someone understands or can respond bc I’m in a bad flare and just want to know I’m not alone 😔. Mine was personally triggered by the Idaho murder thing that I keep seeing on Tik tok. I made myself watch dateline about it for ERP so I’m sitting with all the anxiety right now and I can’t stop ruminating. He had OCD (the criminal who did it) so of course that has me legit spiraling. 😣😣😣😣
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