I broke up with my partner because I didn’t feel like it was fair to her to have to be with someone who was in constant doubt over his attraction and the relationship long term.. now I’m missing this person and am having a hard time trusting my decision or what to do next.
I broke up with my partner too because of ocd problems I was having. That was two years ago. I didn’t know it’s was ocd at the time- that would’ve been helpful. We were apart for like a month and a half and then we got back together. He really missed me. I feel like a burden to him sometimes. Actually, I feel like one today. But he doesn’t see me like that. He wants me around because he has mental struggles too, you know? And we help each other. We love each other. Whether you get back together or not, you are definitely not alone. Lots of people have gone through and are going through the same as you. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
@Kaitlyn🌸 Thank you for your comment.. was the reason you broke up because of relationship ocd? Did you explain that at the time of getting back together.
@Jakiss12 Well, I didn’t know it was rocd at the time, but looking back, yes it was. I was constantly over analyzing how good our relationship was. Was there red flags? Was he saying and doing the right stuff? What if I made a wrong choice? Would a good couple be like this? Everytime I was able to get one worry to go away, another one would spring up, sometimes not even an hour apart. It was so exhausting, I would cry, I felt like vomiting, I wanted to pull my hair out or scream or just combust. And I loved him but I did not know what I was dealing with. I didn’t have any tools to handle it. So my solution was to just end the relationship. And I didn’t feel relief. But once I had relief for awhile, I missed him and I knew I wanted him back. Now that I know what it is, I talk to him about it and I think it really helps when your partner understands what you’re going through. Now he knows ways to support me.
I think when I got back together with him, I did my best to explain. However, at the time I thought I just anxiety, so I was explaining it through an incomplete lens. It’s awesome that you’re here and you already know about ocd!
@Kaitlyn🌸 Had it since childhood but have never had it take this form
Hey this happened in my relationship we broke up because of my rocd was really bad but we ended up getting back together in the end after realising how much I did love him I still get episodes now which can be hard but they’ll always come and go in relationships
@ambermayx What’s the best thing that has helped you cope with ROCD.. I don’t even understand what an exposure would be for it or how to reconcile your fears and doubts and trust yourself
@Jakiss12 For me, I worry that I will offend my partner and he will secretly think I’m bad without telling me. For example, I don’t really like this rug he has, but I feel really guilty saying anything at all about the rug. So an exposure my therapist assigned me was to say something along the lines of, “hey, you know what? This rug is really not to my taste. I don’t like it very much.” And then don’t say anything else, just look away. No apologizing, no admitting it was an exposure.
@Kaitlyn🌸 Oh that’s very interesting.. I can kinda see how that would work.. trying to think of it on my end
@Jakiss12 Have you talked to your therapist about it? Mine comes up with the best exposure ideas
@Kaitlyn🌸 I need to more.. he doesn’t quite think it’s ROCD because the theme switched
@Jakiss12 I haven’t had proper therapy for it so not sure how I’m meant to help it and struggling with it. But I make sure to communicate with my partner he’s really understanding and then I just remind myself it’s an episode and it will pass
Ooff this really triggered me. I’m sorry that you’re going through this. How are you feeling now?
I’m feeling very very confused… unable to trust my decision one way or the other….
Do you ever meet a guy that treats you so well and you fall in love with him but then all of a sudden you get hit with thoughts of self doubt on weather or not you do love him or even find him attractive? I’m going through this right now and these thoughts overtake my emotions and any time we do lovey dovey things my stomach drops and I get anxious when I can’t feel any lovey dovey emotions. It also makes me want to run away or makes me question that I don’t wanna be with him and it’s stressful to deal with these thoughts daily. Anyone relate?
This past week has been very challenging; I have been seeing this guy now for a couple of months, and every now and then I will experience a loss of interest in him. Sometimes this is brought upon by the OCD itself, which makes me not want to be around him because he is the trigger. Other times, it’s hard to tell if I’m genuinely not interested, and this drives me absolutely crazy. I feel like I am leading him on and forcing myself to like him just because I want to be in a relationship. To make things clear, he is the sweetest guy and hasn’t done anything wrong; he knows that I struggle with R-OCD and has been very understanding, but isn’t aware of my periods of disinterest and doesn’t know just how distressed I get. This morning, he texted me and said he can’t wait to see me. While reading his text, I never got excited or felt butterflies, I just felt sick to my stomach because all I can think about is how I’m gonna have to tell him I’m not into him right now. I feel like at this point with the back and forth feelings, I just need to end things. The more I think about it, the more I start to believe and feel that’s the right answer. I get sad because I am starting to catch feelings and don’t want to put a stop to a potentially good relationship. I’m really trying to understand why my feelings for him are constantly up and down.
Hello, I recently discovered I may have relationship OCD. I haven’t been formally diagnosed yet but I started experiencing thoughts like “I don’t really love him” or “I’m gonna break up with him”, and sometimes even thoughts that he doesn’t love me or he’s gonna leave me. This all started when I got a text from a former partner, and it was very surprising. I thought since it affected me so much that it meant I still loved him and that I didn’t love my current boyfriend. Before this event, I struggled with intrusive thoughts and compulsions but never about relationships and I didn’t think I had OCD. I wasn’t experiencing any of these specific thoughts before I got that text, and it’s really scary and I’m afraid my thoughts are true. I really do love my boyfriend but these thoughts are really making me depressed.
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