Please help

I think I might be bipolar keep on having mood swings I go from okay to sad to suicidal to homicidal I don't know why I keep on thinking about killing myself and other people I want to tell my school therapist but I'm scared that she'll be afraid of me I don't know what to do I don't want to hurt anyone but I keep on hearing voices telling me to kill people that I don't like and I can't take it and to kill myself I don't know what's wrong with me I've thought about killing people before when I really got overwhelmed with my thoughts but everyday now I'll keep on thinking about killing myself and other people what should I do I don't know where to go for help because I feel like I'll get in trouble

hen7

Date posted: 48w ago

I had these thoughts a lot in my teens. I’m a verbal person and heard my intrusive thoughts as these “commands” in my head. I was terrified and only recently (nearing 40 yo) started talking about that period in my life. I didn’t know ocd existed back then and only got diagnosed at 26 yo. I think it’s super brave you at least dare to post about it here. 👏 I don’t know where in the world you’re located, but if you can, find a therapist who knows what ocd is. Or maybe there’s a telephone number available from an organisation that advocates for people who suffer from ocd that you can call? So sorry to hear you’re struggling with this. Know that there’s treatment for ocd and your life can get much better!

Date posted: 48w ago

I would recommend that you talk to your school counselor about this, especially if you are hearing voices that are telling you to kill people. Not sure what the exact illness or illnesses are here. So don't take any chances, go talk to the counselor, or a trusted teacher or other adult. Even a trusted friend if that's all you feel comfortable doing. You must do this. Nothing bad will happen to you. Just be honest. If these are just OCD thoughts then there is nothing to be afraid of and you're not a bad person. Many people accross the country even overseas share these same thoughts with you. Whatever is causing these thoughts do not worry it is just the illness at work, it is not you. OK? Go talk to someone before things go any further. Hopefully they will be able to help you get the treatment you need.

hen7

Date posted: 48w ago

Also know that many many people have had an intrusion about killing someone at least once in their lives. It’s a very common one, actually. I always see myself stabbing myself or someone when I’m holding a large knife. A L W A Y S. The worry about the thoughts is what’s making them multiply.

cute taco

Date posted: 48w ago

Thank you for your advice I'm just so scared one time when I was at school I was hearing voices telling me to kill people I was so scared and I'm afraid that I might be a school shooter I don't know what to do

hen7

Date posted: 48w ago

@cute taco Do you hear these voices audibly? Or is it in your head? Like self talk?

Wolfram

Date posted: 48w ago

I used to think I was bipolar too when people interrupted or clashed with my compulsions.

Pipipopo

Date posted: 24w ago

Please help I feel insane

I can't do this anymore I feel fucking insane my mind keeps telling me I want to k word people and if feels like my mind is making fucking plans. I'm diagnosed with ocd but I don't even know if it's ocd what if I'm just a terrible fucking person that actually wants to do this. My mind is literally telling me to go buy a weapon and hurt people like I get fucking urges. I can't keep food down and have not for the last few days I feel like I need to go to a mental hospital but I don't want to burden anyone in my family. Like my mind tells me specifically I want to do this but I don't want to but recently ive been having the thought of what if I did do it but I don't want to. I just want it to stop I'm a good person I don't want to hurt anyone at all. But what if one day I actually do want to do something. I can't do this anymore.

Pipipopo

Date posted: 24w ago

Please read at own discretion

This is extremely hard for me to say I have danced around it in previous posts but I simply cant hold it in anymore. The guilt that I feel for thinking these thoughts is immesurable and is driving me to want to hurt myself. I'm gonna start from the very beginning it all started when I was put on Fluvoxamine back then I had the bad habit of looking every medication that I was on up and with that I found out that a student with another student had brought a weapon to school and hurt many people with it. (I can't even write the word but I'm sure you know what the thing was) The intrusive thoughts didn't start then for some reason but later when at my school we had a threat of someone who was wanting to do the same thing. But then one morning I got the thought of what if I do that. And then it got worse I would get the thought every day. And then summer came by and I thought I would be fine but it came back when I went to school again this year it got so bad that I had to drop out of school. But for some reason I am still getting the intrusive thoughts and they are even more horrible now with images of me doing it, I get horrible urges, and my mind tells me that I want to do something this terrible. I want people to understand when I say this I don't want to do anything to hurt anyone and never have. I have 0 history of violence to anyone and have been in several situations like that where there was a threat and have felt the fear that comes along with that. I don't understand why these thoughts are there. I feel like I need to put myself into a mental hospital. I never want to hurt anyone and never will.

anonymousmm

Date posted: 23w ago

RELIGIOUS/HARM OCD

I don’t know what to do, I feel so lost and feel like I’m losing my mind… I don’t know what to do, I am still getting the terrible thoughts of “God is telling you to kill someone” and I’m literally mid panic attack, I keep trying to reason with logic because it even says in the 10 commandments “thou shall not murder.” So I don’t even know why I’m getting these thoughts… ugh… people say that intrusive thoughts trigger things you care about the most, which mine would be Jesus & the people around me, which is why I get the harm OCD about people I care about the most.. someone recently said that I could be schizophrenic and now I’m terribly worried that I could have that.. I am so terribly afraid of becoming “crazy” and doing horrible things… can someone please give me tips to help this, and or message me?

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