I don't need exams but does anyone have multiple themes that thrive off of one type of compulsion? I realised I had this years ago and wondering if anyone else has/ had the same issue. I think I may have had 2-4 themes thriving off of one compulsion.
I had harm ocd and moral scrupolosity. Someone did me wrong when I was a teenager. I struggled with knowing if I was a good or bad person but the anger I felt towards this guy was frightening and I'd do compulsions to convince myself I was bad to alleviate the feeling of uncertainty. Mainly ruminating. I had a lot of hatred in myself for years. It's almost as if the compulsions justified each theme. I dunno, It's a weird one
@happiness._.123 Sounds like you were gaslit by the school because of a simple printing error. That sucks. I remember being mistaken for another student by a teacher and being annoyed too. Nowhere near as bad as yours though. All of the other things you mentioned kind of makes sense why you got ocd. My mother has Ocd too but hers is different to mine. Is your dad's difoto yours?
@happiness._.123 My mother's has a counting compulsion and I've never had that. I don't know what goes through her head as she won't ever talk about it. It's very private for her. I believe she feels ashamed and thinks it can't get better because she didn't get hers through trauma like me, she got it following and illness and it was an overnight thing. When I talked about getting better as quick as I did and proved it, it triggers her so bad. She's never even tried, but every one has their own recovery goals. She's just accepted that's hers. She's a very successful woman and it hasn't held her back much in life.
@happiness._.123 I know it sounds weird as I don't know if I believe in a god but I believe in something more out there. I argued and debated with whatever was out there and as to why I got this and others didn't and think its cruel. I wouldn't wish ocd on any living creature, even if they were the worst person on the planet. The way I see it now was a challenge or a trial not given to many because maybe they're meant for a different one of their own. I was caring before I had ocd even though I don't remember much before I was 6, I remember that. I still am now and I'm so much stronger than I think I ever could've been without it. As much torment and suffering I went through with ocd, I am grateful for all of it now. I was forged into something stronger because of it.
@happiness._.123 I dont disbelieve. I believe in something and not sure what it is and I'm not going to figure it out either. I believe whatever it is has good intentions. I'm jus going to show my gratitude by moving forward and paying forward the kindness and knowledge I received on my recovery journey. I don't want my recovery to just end with me when I know others are going through it. I can't walk their path for them but I can attempt to be a guide I also don't think ocd is evil even though some of the themes seem to feel that way. When I found out I had it and saw the stats, it was a "challenge accepted" kind of moment.
@happiness._.123 Not so much the struggle ocd causes by itself. More the hardships that go along with having it. The challenge is to overcome it and understand what makes us work. Like a form of enlightenment I guess.
@happiness._.123 In all honesty, I'm a little unsure what you were asking. Sorry 😅
@happiness._.123 Almost there. The last bit where you say the brain helps us prevent the thing from happening... That's the issue. That bit is the disorder and a processing problem that you can kind of undo. I really really want to do a video on this so it's easier to understand
@happiness._.123 I don't know when I'll make it. I need to learn how to do it. I've never made a video before and I'd want it animated as I'm not the most articulate person and I swear a lot 😅
@happiness._.123 I'll talk to my dad later about suggestions as he has studio equipment for recording and my mums a therapist. I'll see if she has any input
Spoke to a local non-profit organisation that helps with mental health and they're going to have a meeting to see if I can do anything there to help or possibly point me in the right direction. The woman I spoke to actually used to volunteer somewhere I used to volunteer at 10 years ago and we know some of the same people
@happiness._.123 I believe in the morning ocd can be worse because the stress hormone is actually what tells us to wake up every day. Stress is a trigger. I'd just work on stuff that may p lower stress levels
@happiness._.123 https://nocd.page.link/dbqYgS9T1qpwLYmg6 I don't know if you've seen this old post of mine
@happiness._.123 Hope it helps. Even if you do something in spite of it, you're still doing it because of it and that's feeds into the ocd
@happiness._.123 It's going to take a while. Could be months. I need to find an animator or learn how to do it myself and I'm a busy guy I usually work 7 days a week 🤷♂️
Different to *
I was doing some research and saw about the narcissistic traits that OCD can create. Is this after the person knows they have OCD? Because I always knew I had it. But it was the classic one, with little quirks. Years later I developed false memory and intrusive thoughts whit my present theme. I was reading this because I was thinking about attraction. And I think I'm only attracted to two people in this life. But I remember from times by I had the feeling to please people. Without any interest and without even having the intention to do it, it was very automatic. So I was constantly focusing on how I was apparently being. I never acted like I was interested, but it was always like I was dealing with people's focuses. To tell you the truth, I've noticed that I do this even in other social interactions. I feel like I'm being watched all the time and so I have to act the way I'd like to be seen, like a sweet and delicate person. To be honest, I thought it had to do with my childhood issues because I was very careless and that got me bullied a lot when I was little kid. So I thought I was super focused on my appearance because of that. And I thought that the agaradar came as a consequence precisely because I was always seen as a grotesque girl because I took little care of myself. I even remember that the compliment that made me happiest was when someone said I was delicate. It made sense to me that it really was that. But after researching more, I realized that there are a lot of impulsive and repetitive things in my actions. And never with any intention. But in a very strange way. So much so that when I was younger I swore that I had some kind of personality disorder because it was very common to act one way one day and another way the next day. Maybe I was just an unstable teenager? Thank u for the help!
I was just thinking about how OCD tries to be tricky and switches themes on us!! The amount of times I have said to myself in the past, IF ONLY I HAD THE OLDER THEME I USE TO WORRY ABOUT BECAUSE THIS NEW ONE IS SO MUCH WORSE!!! Has anyone ever experienced this before? Once I started ERP therapy, I began to really start understanding what mental/physical compulsions I was doing to really keep my OCD alive! While I did this, I would also tap into my self-compassion bucket, even when it felt like it was dry at times, because it was SO easy to judge myself for because of the sheer presence of my thoughts. I would also have the most self-compassion for myself for those taboo intrusive thoughts that really felt so strong, ego-dystonic and real!!! My OCD would hop around from theme to theme and just when I thought I figured it out (compulsion) it would hop again and make me discouraged! I noticed for me that once I really understood my compulsions, it didn't matter when the theme switched as I could tackle it at its core. If I was able to stay steadfast and resist compulsions the best I could, I started to notice that my CONFIDENCE increased in the long run! I also noticed that some of the core fears were the same for different OCD subtypes. OCD treatment is hard BUT living with OCD is harder. I have experienced subtypes including Harm OCD, ROCD, Moral Scrupulosity, Sensorimotor, Contamination, Perfectionism/Just Right, Hit and Run, Magical Thinking, Real Event/False Memory. ERP therapy allowed me to really work on stopping these compulsions and switching from theme to theme. I was fed up with what OCD took from me and I needed to do something about it. I talked to an ERP therapist and it was one of the best decisions of my life. If you are struggling, keep pushing and get the help you deserve!! You got this!!!
Why is it that you beat one OCD think, but another OCD thing comes up related to it, but the same theme?
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