I gave into a POCD intrusive thought. Nothing came of it, but it was wrong. I feel really guilty and am terrified to tell my therapist but I feel like I should because of the guilt. I hate this so much.
This happened to me recently. I think it's important to be so open and honest in therapy. This way you and your therapist can assess everything, how it happened, why it happened, if there were any changes, etc. Don't feel bad, people relapse all the time and it's common. You just have to get back on the horse and start again. And don't feel like you wasted everything and are starting from the beginning. Don't give that to your OCD. And finally if you ever feel like you are being 'judged' by your therapist that is probably just the OCD too! Especially if you know your therapist is someone that you can trust.
But what if it was something deemed illegal? Nothing came of it like I Said but POCD I feel like is especially difficult
@Anonymous - Thinking about doing something illegal and doing something illegal are two separate things. OCD is clinging onto it because it's "illegal". My OCD clings onto my relationship and doubts every single aspect of the person that I am with, because he's so important to me. If it wasn't illegal or wasn't "bad", it wouldn't bother the OCD
Okay, you gave in to an intrusive thought, so you had a setback, don't you think that it's ocd telling you to feel guilty? Your therapist needs to know when you're able to resist and when you are successful, Rome wasn't built in a dat, you can't expect to be perfect and never have a setback.
I know. It's just hard accepting that I can do things going against my morals sometimes.
I mean stigmatized
I know how you feel, currently feeling the same way :( I tend to confess to my therapist but she usually always says it’s OCD
My child was laying across me and every time I breathed a certain way I was getting a groinal sensation. I kept breathing like that anyways (ugh idk why), and then my mind told me I had hurt them that I might as well do something else because what's more. So idk why or what overcame me other than the thought of doing it and causing another feeling (I literally had to question what to do during this and the only thing I could come up with was to move my elbow towards her groin area) but it came across my mind to elbow my child, and I elbowed their crotch or side area. Which caused another unwanted groinal sensation. Then I began FREAKING smooth out and asked my child to move. Then I've been stressing since. I feel like as a mom I don't deserve to be theirs anymore. Idk what overcame me, and in the moment, it felt like I wanted to move my elbow, but I know that can also be my OCD speaking. Right? I clearly regret it all and hate myself. I would never intentionally hurt my child; I don't know what happened in my head when this happened. I was doing SO well! Is this my POCD that I've been diagnosed with by my OCD specialized therapist? Just a struggling mom who used to be the best of the best. I'm very depressed by this. Idk what to do with myself. I live in regret now, and I just wish it would've never ever happened. I can't stop ruminating and being depressed thinking I don't deserve anything.
I am 15 years old and my POCD feels like its not POCD, i feel like i like my intrusive thoughts, but i have more intrusive thoughts about having intrusive thoughts, and i feel like i cant enjoy the things i normally enjoy anymore, like calling with my girlfriend and joking with her because this is still in the back of my mind, its making me question morals and if i ever even viewed P as completely wrong and i hate this so much, i love my nieces and nephews and when they're over i know id never do anything with my intrusive thoughts but when they arent present i feel like i like my thoughts. Before this i was dealing with HOCD and ROCD and i wish i could go back to that
I can’t help but feel so anxious because of guilt. I feel guilty about not sharing everything about my OCD to my partner, but because I understand that confession itself is a compulsion and would not help anyone. I feel so anxious too that if all my fears come true and she finds out, then it would be so devastating for everyone especially her. Does anyone feel the same thing? How could I change my perspective on this?
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