why is it when i try ‘accept’ the thoughts to let them pass, or try sit with them, it spirals into another one, each a little more realistic as they go. i was doing so well. i’ve not felt so deflated in years 🫤
Two things help me..one I named my ocd. I am not my thoughts. And two I yell at ocd and call her name when doing so. I've found the response prevention piece is super important to stop my looping. I also try to remember ocd ebbs and flows. I was doing good for a month or so and some life stuff happened and right now is more challenging, especially the ruminating in my head. Me and audiobooks are becoming a thing cause it distracts me after I do my response prevention especially when thinking harm thoughts. You said you were doing so well.. can we focus on that? I'm super proud you were doing so well.
@Anonymous what is the response prevention peace? thank you for your support ☺️
@lolplzhelp That's when you leave things uncertain. Ocd hates uncertainty hence the reassurance, ruminating, for me googling, asking people etc. Are you in therapy w an ocd therapist doing erp?
@Anonymous No, not anymore. I was in camhs but i’m nearly 19 now - i was kept in for other reasons but i have one more appointment. thinking about going to see a new therapist i think
@lolplzhelp I don't accept the ocd thoughts, I yell back at them. My response prevention is casting doubt for the thoughts I have. For example if I thought I should put the knives away or hide them cause I might lose it my response prevention would be something like. Well I guess I'll just worry about it when I lose it. I don't know for sure I'm not going to off someone because I'll have lost it. I'll just worry about it when it happens. If I think someone hates me or j did something wrong etc and I want to text them again or message them to get reassurance I say we'll maybe I did something and maybe I didn't. Ocd is yelling at me so I'm again just gonna wait and see. There's a lot of Maybe, we'll I'll worry about it when and if it happens, it could happen i don't know, for my response prevention. If it's harm thoughts about suicide or self harm I say my response prevention then listen to an audiobook.
It takes practice. We're desperate for relief and so we tend to believe that "accepting" or "sitting with" thoughts should work like magic. You have to ride the entire wave. As much as possible continue to live your life :-).
@Ben84 I think it just scares me that i could end up sitting with/accepting the thoughts for a long time and have them not go away, that that would make it a reality sort of thing. I’m not sure. it’s scary!!
You were doing well and are still doing well. Remember Ocd ebs and flows and sometimes there's a spike. I'm in a spike right now and I have to push back and it feels like I'm pushing an entire mountain up a never ending hill
does anyone else with this theme feel like their suic. ocd skyrockets when something in your life happens?? i’ve been doing so good managing these thoughts and not panicking, but i had a event happen in my life and all of them are back hitting hard. i’m arguing with myself on whether im actually depressed or not and “what if this means my thoughts are real”, it’s all what if thoughts, but because ive been doing so good with them, what if they are real this time? like im panicking again because im scared they are real? like i’m not depressed im just going through a few things right now. idk what it is. but i really need tips on how to help with setbacks and what to do to stop myself from arguing with my mind when i already know the truth.
Last week was a lot easier for me. I felt like thoughts didn’t control me and my actions as much as they did earlier. Today was really hard for me and I feel like I’m starting to lose hope again:( I can’t take the thoughts and the feelings that come with them anymore. I feel like I have failed and I’m never going to be happy again.
But it actually feels worse, and no not because now Im letting myself feel the feelings, I feel more stressful and hopelessness sparked out too, and a weird scary feeling, i think its anxiety, that i feel back in the pandemic and I woke up at the middle of the night feeling that feeling many times.For years i felt good now that im trying to let myself feel the emotions, fear and hopelessness kicks in. I understand that you should accept and allow every feeling, but if you have alot of fear it will just throw you wherever it wants and you will feel hopeless. I know when you are there, feeling depressed and hopeless it means you did something bad(well not always but you know what i mean). I tried it but this scary feeling of hopeless anxiety made me stop it.
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