Why should I accept emotions that are based on distortions and don't help me?

I dont like the "accept every emotion" concept

Not every emotion we have is important or say something, i struggle with this alot. Why should i accept an emotion that doesnt help me? If someone hurts me, and i get a feeling that the world is evil, and i feel depressed, its nothing good in that to accept feeling depressed that the world is evil cause this thought is even a lie, its a distortion. Its okay to acknowledge that someone hurted you, but why should i accept feeling depressed cause now i think life is bad. I dont understand this. Then if you try to change that and say no, not everyone is evil, this isnt true, now youre fighting with the thoughts so thats a compulsion. Then all you can do is actually accept the feeling being there, which frustrates me cause its based on a distortion. Not every emotion is useful. For exemple i saw a post on tiktok that roman males had the right in their time to sell, or execute their childrens and because i dont have a good relationship with my dad, i had a thought that he would sell us or kill us, and that made me feel so angry at my dad and depressed, but then i realized this is a huge distortion, my dad its not like that even that we dont get along, but instead of relief i felt like i pushed away the emotions, not numbness, but that feeling that i just pushed away all. But what shouldve i done? Feel the distorted feeling that i made up? Do you know that we have alot of thoughts and a day and letting all their emotion be there would be really tiring. This really bothers me, if i dont have to let myself be controlled by emotions then why i feel like im pushing away and i get worse when im just not letting them control my day, not letting them get fully in the surface to control how i view things

Username: NicaNica

Date posted: 30w ago

You accept it being there as you go about your day. There’s a difference.

Username: PRIV8PRIV8

Date posted: 30w ago

But theres the thing that you have to stop thinking about it, cause some ocders has the compulsion that they want to solve it. I have that too and now i know its bad so whenever i have a thought now im afraid to think about it and now my compulsion is to avoid. So either if the thoughts are there i think about it or i avoid thinking about it. Its something like o try to avoid the compulsion which also turns into a compulsiom, i hope you get what im saying

Username: Chickens_FrogsChickens_Frogs

Date posted: 30w ago

@PRIV8 I am interested in what you said here about some ocders have the compulsion that they want to solve it. I have that and is that the “meta ocd”? For example, me…My thoughts go to my own diagnosis of ADHD and OCD too much. At one point, it was so bad I needed Prozac to knock me off the hard thought loop. I was writing massive notes, I was researching on the internet, taking notebooks to different family members asking questions and taking notes, I was stopping at one of my brothers houses at night unannounced because I JUST HAD to get to the bottom of all this. Why me? Why am I the disorganized mess that can’t get my crap together but every other family member seems the complete opposite? Except for the one I stopped to talked to the most but even he is much neater, organized than I am. Turns out he has clinical OCD big time. He didn’t even know it. He just said he would press the oven off button at least 5 times then walk away and wonder did he turn it off and the walk back to do it again. He can’t pass a particular light switch and turn it off and on several times and if he doesn’t he feels something bad will happen. He’s been severely depressed at times. Anyway, I have most in common with him. He’s bad with money and my other two brothers are exceptionally good with it. My point though is I had to know who I got this from? Was I really ADHD? How could I go decades with anxiety and depression treatment without this being noticed? Then when told I had both it became how is that possible and how does that even work? It’s got to be one or the other it can’t be both? Am I this messed up? How could I accomplish what I did in my life having both? And on and on and on it goes. Trying to solve it I guess something that isn’t necessarily solvable. I told my psychiatrist when first diagnosed that everything feels like anxiety to me. ? The OCD. He said “well you have to tell me what you think……then he stopped and said “no, it’s OCD” with affirmative. Yet that statement plays back in my head that “was he questioning it”. You see where this is going here. Just more questioning and doubt. I keep telling myself to just “live with the unknown” and “accept the diagnosis” only to find myself talking about it, thinking about it and researching it again. Not like I was before but still do. I wish that would stop. So, is this “need to solve” deal “meta OCD”? Why the label matters to me is questionable but if I am OCD which I guess I am depending on the day or time you ask me I might give a different answer. I don’t have a theme because prior to being diagnosed with OCD I wasn’t obsessing over OCD so I wondered what I was obsessing over. Sorry for the ramble. That maybe my ADHD. I noticed posts made by those with ADHD tend to be longer than most. Thanks

Username: RedknightRedknight

Date posted: 30w ago

Hey friend! I understand your frustration. Emotions can be complicated. Have you ever tried making a “distraction list”?

Username: PRIV8PRIV8

Date posted: 30w ago

Distraction isnt conpulsion?

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 30w ago

@PRIV8 From my understanding no, it is more of a tool to help you stop ruminating (which is a compulsion).

Username: RedknightRedknight

Date posted: 30w ago

It can be, but not in the way I’m talking about. When we feel different emotions that we don’t want to feel, sometimes doing something to take our mind off it can help us take a step back and analyze our emotions and what we’re experiencing a bit better. For example, if I were sad, I’d definitely pray and ask God for help and then go watch a documentary or my favorite tv show. That way I know that God will help me, and watching a movie might make me feel better and be able to process my emotions better. Does that make sense?

Username: RedknightRedknight

Date posted: 30w ago

We are always going to feel emotion, no matter what we do. But finding outlets that will help us process them and move past them can be a really positive and beneficial way to deal with difficult emotions.

Username: malikalimalikali

Date posted: 30w ago

even a distorted reality feels real and so the emotional reaction in those moments is real to us. when we push thoughts away they naturally get stronger, I like the analogy of trying to push a beach ball under water. it's very difficult and slippery and the second you stop concentrating it'll pop back up. just like wrestling with thoughts and emotions. by accepting that we feel the way we feel when we feel it we signal to our body and mind that we are ok, there isn't danger, this is natural. which it is 🤗 then the emotions and thoughts can fade ❤️✨ it's hard I know but you can do it 💪 🐾✨

Username: PRIV8PRIV8

Date posted: 30w ago

Oh so the whole acceptance is just for our body to see that theres no danger, but we still dont have to work and think about why do we feel this, whats the meaning. Or work on it like a trauma. Its hard tho cause people are black and white thinkers and say you ignore what is ocd and you work on what is trauma... but thats not reality. If you have ocd thats the glass youre locking at everything, every emotion, theres no this is ocd but thats trauma. Ocd is how you relate to everything. So its hard to see when you have to ignore feelings cause they have no meaning and when you have to think about why do you have this reaction, what is the meaning of it

Username: woahman

Date posted: 2y ago

Do u believe that you can control the mind or not?

So ist just about ocd, I think I have a really bad anxiety right now about this topic. So i used to believe that i cant control my mind and i have to accept every thought but deep down it made me feel like a victim that i always have to accept how i feel and what i think, theres no other way... one day i had enough of this, because i saw that others who are doing this for years are still having the same thoughts, and i still felt bad and had the same thoughts to and i decided that i will find something else. So i found a good youtuve channel where they teach you that youre the creator of your emotions and you can control your mind. I learned that i have anxiety and low moods cause i have negative beliefs about myself and the world which i need to change then these feelings will not be strong. It helped so much and i saw that its better then just observing it and moving on, bc you actually see the problem and not avoid it. It helped me alot. Then today i had a negative emotions and i started to see what im telling myself, what thoughts i have, and this time i actually got lost in my mind. Or as others said i got into the rabbit hole of negative thinking. And i couldnt get out and i was so desperate that this isnt helping me either... Trying to control your mind and change beliefs just makes me more stressed, but just accepting it and moving on still will not help,cause i will still will have the thoughts and emotions without knowing why i constantly have it. What do yall think, are you the creater of your emotions, can you control the mind or not?

Username: jj7

Date posted: 1y ago

acceptance

Does anyone else get triggered by some of the things people say about accepting and recovering. Idk Like sometimes I feel like my thoughts are so awful how could i ever come to accept that and let it roam free in my brain. I think that makes my fear worse especially when it comes to magical thinking :(

Username: PRIV8

Date posted: 42w ago

Accepting fear/anxiety

Now i know i need to accept when i feel anxiety or fear, ive been avoiding it or pushing it away.l, cause im afraid ir will take me and to be honest i cant really deal with fear. I noticed when i feel it a I say its okay, im feeling this but theres no danger and by this i pushing it away. But when theres is signs of an aczual danger i ho crazy. I try to push away the fear but it says that "there is a sign, we are in danger, are you crazy?" Ane i keep spinning. I heard alot about accepting thatbwe feel anxiety or fear but thats always makes me accept that theres a danger. Cause im accepting what i feeling but then my mind wants to know if theres a danger and im spinning over that, then i feel like i need to avoid it cause i cant handle... or if i say theres might be a danger or there is i go crazy... then i start to have the selfharm automative thoughts and in the panic i cant see that its ocd, im trying to say it but i feel like im lying, then everything feels true... i cant accept that i feel anxiety but its not a danger but even this you can see i start to rumminate over "okay i feel this but is there a problem? Yeah is see this this is a problem, im avoiding, i have to do something about it quickly, then i try to stop to not act based of fear but i feel bad cause im avoiding. I cant see the reality when i feel panic or afraid, even trying to see reality becomes compulsive. What im dealing with now is that i get hit by anxiety, i accept it and i get a feeling that but theres no fear and i get hit by this toxic good feeling like i avoided a danger and i dont like it cause that feeds the fear

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Why should I accept emotions that are based on distortions and don't help me?

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